The Pie Fight Family (Sung to "The Addams Family" 60's TV show theme song) (with apologies to Vic Mizzy) Ba-da-ba-bum, snap, snap Ba-da-ba-bum, snap, snap Ba-da-ba-bum, Ba-da-ba-bum, Ba-da-ba-bum, snap, snap Ba-da-ba-bum, snap, snap Ba-da-ba-bum, s...

In the quaint town of Willowbrook, an annual pie-eating contest was the highlight of the summer festival. The contest drew crowds from neighboring towns who gathered to watch as participants devoured pie after pie, their faces smudged with cream and...

The Sound of Splatter (with apologies to Simon and Garfunkel) Hello, des-sert, my old friend Ilve come to play with you again Because a pie that I was keeping Left its mark while I was sleeping And the torte that was planted on my face Still remains...

"NICE SUIT, James!" the voice of Jack McFarland, relief pitcher and team prankster rang out, as James made his way into the locker room with Phil, his cameraman. In this city where baseball was more than just a game, the fervor for the local team's...

James' constant bullying ever since Phil had been assigned his cameraman six months ago had left the latter feeling exasperated and resentful. James' condescending behavior had pushed him to his limits, and Phil had decided that it was time to orches...

Amidst the tempestuous whirlwind of pranks that engulfed the weary baseball team, Jack MacFarland found himself dancing on the fine line between camaraderie and tension, a place where the bizarre and the mundane intermingled like the eerie mist that...

Oh, buckle up, 'cause I'm about to spill the beans on the mother of all trainwrecks that was this pool party. There I am, chilling by the water, taking in the scene, when my eyes lock onto James strutting in like a peacock on Viagra. This dude's wear...

Looking for WAM in all the Right Places (Song: "Looking for Love) (with apologies to Johnny Lee) I spent a lifetime looking for WAM Then I found UMD*, get me my cam Playing those WAM games, certain to win** And throwing those sweet pies and wamming...

So there I was, right in the middle of the urban circus, where the skyscrapers were shooting up like they had something to prove, and the construction orchestra was banging on my brain like a drummer on steroids. And right in the middle of this mayhe...

Let them Fly (Sung to the melody of "Let it Go" from "Frozen") (with apologies to Idina Menzel) The cream glows white on the paper plates Ready to do their thing A promise of much messiness All these pies that I should fling The pies are creating t...

I met this girl Jessica through some friends at a party one night. We talked a lot that night because she had that fun bubbly personality and smiled a lot making her fun to be around. We mostly just joked around telling stories and stuff danced some...

I met Paul and Emma (Em) at a party. It is amazing how a few drinks open up the conversation. There was a pool at the party and they threw in a guy for his birthday and when he climbed out I commented on how nice that was and I loved to do that. Th...

One summer evening, two chambermaids were walking on the beach. One of the chambermaids (Vica) was dressed in a green work robe with cord and long sleeves, the other chambermaid (Alia) was wearing a blue work robe with cord and long sleeves. Both wom...

THE STORY The members gathered to celebrate Season Closing Day. It was a day of relaxation, camaraderie, and indulgence for most, but there was one guest who always managed to sour the mood--James Anderson, the conservative columnist and perpetual t...

On another hot summer day, I see the woman in the long blue denim dress (Jenna) again. Jenna adjusted her long denim dress a bit with her hands, sat down on a sunbed and took off her shoes. Next to Jenna sat a young woman in a long gray dress (Petra)...

On a hot summer day, a woman wearing a long blue denim dress (Jenna), probably a beach vendor, was sitting on a sunbed. Next to Jenna came a fat woman wearing a long white dress with flowers (Fiona). Arranging her long white flowered dress with her r...

It was a sweltering summer's day, and the vibrant Dreamland Theme Park beckoned with promises of thrilling rides and laughter-filled adventures. Gemma and Clara, best friends since childhood, had been looking forward to this day for months. They arri...

I'm in the Mood for Wam (with apologies to Jimmy McHugh and Dorothy Fields) I'm in the mood for wam Simply because you're creamy Honey, but when you're creamy I'm in the mood for wam Chocolate is in your eyes Dark as the night we're under Oh, is it...

Pieing Me Softly (song: Killing Me Softly, Roberta Flack lyrics) (with apologies to Charles Fox and Norman Kimbel) (chorus) Strumming my heartstrings by pieing Giving me thrills with his throws Pieing me softly with his hands Pieing me softly with h...

Mark was feeling a bit down. He had just finished a relationship with his girlfriend of two years Penny. Well to be more accurate Penny had finished the relationship on the grounds that she had discovered Mark was having a fling with his Sports Physi...

My first bath with a skirt on me Seeing that during the summer some young girls and even mature women, in order to cool off, take a bath in the lake or in the sea nested in a skirt and a blouse or a T-shirt, I tried to see how I look and how I feel...

I Was Born Under a Wallowing Star (Song: "I Was Born Under a Wandering Star" from "Paint Your Wagon" (with apologies to Lerner and Loewe) I was born under a wallowing star I was born to find the mud from afar I was made for mud, rolling in the muck...

Since the Joker had been locked away in Arkham, Harley had been forced to go solo. She had been keeping the old pie and confection factory hideout in working order in Mr. J's absence. In fact, she'd even made it into a small business that would one...

On the same warm summer day, but in the afternoon, the two plump women I mentioned before, Arina and Erin, came to the beach again. This time Arina was dressed in a long shiny black skirt and a gray top with long sleeves. Erin, as at lunch, wore the...

Christmas Pies (song: Jingle Bells) To the store we go, Buying our supplies Then we knead our dough Preparing our surprise We smell crusts we bake, We set them out to cool And we know that they will break When thrown by stooge or fool, Oh, (choru...