UMD Stories
19 results

Stories by
CockySuit
The Fall of James
Story by CockySuit6/14/25 248 viewsmale
The Fall of James Carrington James Carrington strutted through the county fairgrounds as if he owned the place. In his mind, he did--figuratively, of course. His outfit was a declaration of dominance. A Brioni two-button suit in deep navy, hand-stit...
James, Birthday Boy Turned Cosmic Joke
Story by CockySuit4/6/24 783 viewsmale
So, there's this guy, James, right? Total phony with an ego bigger than Texas. Thinks he's the cat's pajamas, parading around in his fancy navy blue suit like he's the king of the world. But lemme tell ya, underneath that slick exterior, he's just a...
Pompous Windbag Gets a Saucy Surprise
Story by CockySuit9/4/23 658 viewsmale
THE STORY The members gathered to celebrate Season Closing Day. It was a day of relaxation, camaraderie, and indulgence for most, but there was one guest who always managed to sour the mood--James Anderson, the conservative columnist and perpetual t...
Bossman Gets Muddy Makeover
Story by CockySuit8/19/23 789 viewsmale
So there I was, right in the middle of the urban circus, where the skyscrapers were shooting up like they had something to prove, and the construction orchestra was banging on my brain like a drummer on steroids. And right in the middle of this mayhe...
A Different Perspective: No Smoking
Story by CockySuit8/17/23 559 viewsmale
Oh, buckle up, 'cause I'm about to spill the beans on the mother of all trainwrecks that was this pool party. There I am, chilling by the water, taking in the scene, when my eyes lock onto James strutting in like a peacock on Viagra. This dude's wear...
Psych! Smarmy Reporter Falls for Fake Apology
Story by CockySuit8/15/23 598 viewsmale
Amidst the tempestuous whirlwind of pranks that engulfed the weary baseball team, Jack MacFarland found himself dancing on the fine line between camaraderie and tension, a place where the bizarre and the mundane intermingled like the eerie mist that...
Covering the Infield, Literally
Story by CockySuit8/13/23 882 viewsmale
James' constant bullying ever since Phil had been assigned his cameraman six months ago had left the latter feeling exasperated and resentful. James' condescending behavior had pushed him to his limits, and Phil had decided that it was time to orches...
Locker Room Celebration
Story by CockySuit8/13/23 1028 viewsmale
"NICE SUIT, James!" the voice of Jack McFarland, relief pitcher and team prankster rang out, as James made his way into the locker room with Phil, his cameraman. In this city where baseball was more than just a game, the fervor for the local team's...
Embezzler!
Story by CockySuit8/12/23 800 viewsmale
In the quaint town of Willowbrook, an annual pie-eating contest was the highlight of the summer festival. The contest drew crowds from neighboring towns who gathered to watch as participants devoured pie after pie, their faces smudged with cream and...
No Smoking!
Story by CockySuit8/12/23 569 viewsmale
"Can't believe this nonsense about non-smoking, outside even," James muttered to himself, his disdain evident in his voice, "Who's gonna stop me?" Dressed in an impeccable charcoal gray pinstripe double-breasted suit with a contrasting collar, Our...
Embarrassingly Transparent! Humiliated at the Garden Party
Story by CockySuit8/11/23 1132 viewsmale
In the heart of a picturesque town, where elegance and refinement were the norm, there lived a man named James, the epitome of good looks and charm, with a smile that could melt hearts and a demeanor that exuded confidence. But he was also ALL ABOUT...
Bachelor Auction
Story by CockySuit1/10/23 919 viewsmale
(sobs between whimpers)(sobs between whimpers) It's no secret Yours Truly, a.k.a. CockySuit, is known as one of The City's most eligible bachelors. In fact, I was listed as #7 out of 10 in CITY MAGAZINE'S most recent feature story, with the promise...
Build Your Own Story: Halloween Gunge for Bruce Wayne Wannab...
Story by CockySuit10/31/20 264 viewsmale
This was the year Patrick's friends were finally going to teach him that lesson. For years, every Halloween, Patrick's version of "costume" somehow always managed to afford him an opportunity to look his best, in one of his form-fitting, bespoke sui...
All about Perspective Part 3: Rich, the Cop... (Conclusion)
Story by CockySuit9/13/20 509 viewsmale
The Guy in the Suit is pissed. PISSED. He starts to let fly with a string of invectives as he scrambles up out of the water, a frigging, dripping mess, until Rich announces and identifies himself as police, which shuts him up real quick-like. Rich h...
All about Perspective Part 2: Thom, the Suit
Story by CockySuit9/6/20 647 viewsmale
1
His name is Thom and he really shouldn't be here. He really shouldn't. But three times in the week since he discovered it, he's had fun so why not? Sure there's an afternoon meeting he has to get to after lunch, but he's got plenty of time. The numbe...
All about Perspective Part 1: Hal
Story by CockySuit8/30/20 623 viewsmale
2
Hal sees the man in the gray suit and he knows what he wants to do, but should he? The "man" is closer to a boy playing dress-up, but Hal doesn't mind. Hal's alternated between following and preceding him down the wooded path to the water's edge, a...
Glory Days: Soaked at the "Bar Mall"
Story by CockySuit8/25/20 550 viewsmale
Summer 2009 We have an outdoor "bar mall" here, and one Sunday afternoon during a heat-wave, they were advertising something called, Models and Throttles, which was supposed to be this biker event. I mean I guess there were some bikers there...I did...
Glory Days: Thrown into a Kiddy Pool at The Lure
Story by CockySuit8/25/20 608 viewsmale
August 2000 Late summer in Manhattan can be so hot that the entire city smells like the subway; this was one of those nights. I'm on my way to the Lure (a leather/levi gay bar in the meat-packing district) on a Wednesday night for what is called "...
Ode to a Splash from a Passing Car
Story by CockySuit8/23/20 426 viewsmale
Ode to a Splash from a Passing Car Downpour at dusk You meet corner Hey, there, Corner! Light changes, "Don't walk." Car 4th behind a left-turning one switches to its right lane, accelerates, meets puddle Hey, there, Puddle! just before...
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