UMD Stories


James, Birthday Boy Turned Cosmic Joke
Story by CockySuit aka James Jx
Posted 27 days ago     424 views
1
So, there's this guy, James, right? Total phony with an ego bigger than Texas. Thinks he's the cat's pajamas, parading around in his fancy navy blue suit like he's the king of the world. But lemme tell ya, underneath that slick exterior, he's just a ticking time bomb waiting to explode.

So, it's James's big birthday bash, and he's strutting into this grand ballroom like he owns the joint. His suit is so tight, it's practically choking the life outta him, but he's loving every minute of it. Meanwhile, the rest of us schlubs are dressed like we just rolled outta bed, which obviously sticks in James's craw. He's soaking up all the attention, lapping it up like a thirsty dog.

Little does ol' James know, karma's lurking around the corner, ready to knock him down a few pegs. It starts with some harmless pranks--handshakes that zap you like a lightning bolt, flowers squirting water in your face. James tries to laugh it off, but you can see it gets under his skin.

Then things start getting real silly. Someone plants a whoopee cushion on his seat, and the room erupts in laughter while James's face turns redder than a tomato. But that's just the beginning of his woes.

Next thing you know, someone's tipping over a punchbowl onto James's head, turning him into a sticky mess. He's stumbling around like a blindfolded bull in a china shop, and wouldn't you know it, he crashes right into his precious birthday cake. Seven tiers of tiramisu come crashing down, burying him in a mountain of frosting and shame.

And just when you think it can't get any worse, the pinata hanging overhead decides to join the party, exploding like a firecracker and showering James in molasses. Now he's coated head to toe in this gooey mess, looking like a drowned rat in a sugar factory.

The room falls silent, except for the sound of James's friends howling with laughter. And there's James, lying on the floor, covered in muck, tears streaming down his face. Then, like a toddler who's had his favorite toy taken away, he throws the mother of all temper tantrums.

But you know what they say: pride goeth before a fall. And James? Well, he fell harder than Humpty Dumpty off his wall, just one big cosmic joke.
Tagged male
Comments:
tunasandwich:
27 days ago
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Poor James! He's becomes a laughing stock to all!!!
Bo Shorts:
27 days ago
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Yes James got what he deserved Vanity Is a deadly sin. Next time maybe you will be brought down even harder James. You were lucky to only be covered in molasses this time next time it might be nastier with molasses eggs Melted ice cream And even Pies Period
CockySuit aka James J:
27 days ago
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@tunasandwich and @Bo Shorts: On my birthday!!!!
PCE:
26 days ago
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How awful for you. They should be ashamed of themselves for laughing at your misfortune...oh wait....bahahahahahahahahahaha!!!
CockySuit aka James J:
26 days ago
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@PCE: !!^$!#@(&^%!#!%!&!*!*!*! NOT FUNNY!!!!!
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