marcus8710 said: Is it just me or does this topic seem to come up every couple of months or when some community member gets disheartened or harassed and leaves?
To be clear, I'm not saying that it shouldn't come up/be discussed/be addressed/get fixed, this is just definitely not the first time it's been discussed recently. I think KelseyRose synthesized why a lot of this goes unreported and the underlying psychology as to why really well...so how does it get fixed aside from trying to rely on people organically changing their behavior?
You aren't the only one who has noticed it. I noticed it yesterday, in fact, with the "Jenn" post. While it was all fun and games in the post with lines like, "Why is Jenn?" but I couldn't help but wonder if there might be a connection to this.
marcus8710 said: Is it just me or does this topic seem to come up every couple of months or when some community member gets disheartened or harassed and leaves?
To be clear, I'm not saying that it shouldn't come up/be discussed/be addressed/get fixed, this is just definitely not the first time it's been discussed recently. I think KelseyRose synthesized why a lot of this goes unreported and the underlying psychology as to why really well...so how does it get fixed aside from trying to rely on people organically changing their behavior?
If you read my post I wasn't actually talking about being harassed I was reaching out to the female fetishists on here.
Topics come up again and again on many subjects like "What's your fav substance"
Like many have said for those who feel are being harassed and this could be harassment for one person and just repetitive and annoying to another is to change your settings, close your chat, if someone wants to contact you usually an inbox wont be a message like "What should I put in my shorts?"
marcus8710 said: Is it just me or does this topic seem to come up every couple of months or when some community member gets disheartened or harassed and leaves?
To be clear, I'm not saying that it shouldn't come up/be discussed/be addressed/get fixed, this is just definitely not the first time it's been discussed recently. I think KelseyRose synthesized why a lot of this goes unreported and the underlying psychology as to why really well...so how does it get fixed aside from trying to rely on people organically changing their behavior?
If you read my post I wasn't actually talking about being harassed I was reaching out to the female fetishists on here.
Topics come up again and again on many subjects like "What's your fav substance"
Like many have said for those who feel are being harassed and this could be harassment for one person and just repetitive and annoying to another is to change your settings, close your chat, if someone wants to contact you usually an inbox wont be a message like "What should I put in my shorts?"
Very valid points Cinq, TBH I forgot the initial intent of this post by about page 2. Sorry about that
I really like the idea of a group like this. Not only could discussions be had sharing things in a girl talk fashion, but also a hey, heads up with this person so that when inbox messages show up from a certain user people know a head of time. Or where people are changing names and messaging and some of the same red flags are there to help keep the dicks out. I think it is one of the big things that keeps a lot of women from being active on this site are the actions of boys. I do not want this to be an excuse as it is not, more of an understanding of sorts. Here we have something that is a very taboo subject in relationships due to whatever you want to blame. You could literally fire a shotgun at a board to hit all the reasons sex is treated the way it is. So there is a fear of bringing it up and finding someone that is like minded. With that fear comes an over zealousness when you find someone that is interested in the same taboo kink that you are. Any single women on here that might have given you a look are instantly turned off by the barrage. Then there are just boys who are pieces of shit and still live in the women are objects and here to please me mind frame. I think that there needs to be a culture shift among the male population where we just have conversations with people as if they are someone we are friends with. If something mutual happens great. If the person you are talking with is in a relationship or not looking that it needs to be respected and that is fine too. That does not mean stop talking with them or don't be their friends cause that is a dick move.
What do we think about the growing trend for being messaged with something that goes a bit like:- Mmmmmmm. I mean, this literally makes my skin crawl. Any other ladies struggling with this creep fest, or is it just me?
As a female having a fetish like this believe me I've seen and heard from some of the weirdest people on this site most of them are actually pretty harmless but I have had the odd person that seems to think that because I'm here I am open to either abuse or they feel that I literally can say anything sexual and that I'm going to be impressed by what they want to do to me The block feature is definitely one of the best ways to deal with someone who is giving you harassment and I've used it a few times over my time on this site The good thing is with my new role as part of the already hard-working admin team I hope now to be able to put a bit of a female spin on things and hope But if anyone is having issues especially a female so they can come to me directly just PM me directly and I will do my best to get your issue resolved, as a member of admin we have some tools that allows us to see how conversations have taken place beforehand to see what's been going on and if there was any abuse has taken place I have had to use the block button in the past but often just talking to the person and educating them slightly has also heard the great effects once they realise I'm not here for just a pleasure that is something I actually enjoy and choose to share with others on this site Just because I'm selling a video doesn't mean I'm selling myself to abuse and once people start understanding thatThen we can make this site and even better place than it already is
As I've already said especially to the female community I am here for you so please feel free to contact me whatever you say to me is in confidence and will be dealt with in a professional way
The Man and The Wife said: Female wammers are God's gift to earth.
So I'm often told.
I've spent my whole life feeling as odd as hair on a frog. I'm sure there are many women who enjoy incorporating some amount of wam play as part of their foreplay with their partners. For whatever reason, they are not on umd. I wonder if we'd get more positive responses if we polled women who identity as lgbti or those who are also into other fetishes. Hummm... Ms, I've always been fascinated by all things sexual, wants to know.
Frogs don't have hair? Who knew? Seriously, I had a very active single life and my experience was that fetishes with a person tend to come in bunches. In fact one way to gauge a woman's potential interest might be to scope out her feelings about other fetishes which are more common. If she likes even a little BDSM, e.g., she may be likely to be friendly to the humiliation aspects of WAM. If she likes a massage with oil, that means she likes slippery sensations on her skin.
We exist!! We also struggle with things like how (if we choose) to tell a partner about this. There's lots of creeps on here but at the same time some of the kindest messages I've gotten on here were from folks that I wasn't friends with on UMD when they messaged/commented. There was the individual who believed I was a man because I dare workout and have athletic arms. Thankfully that issue was handled quickly by an admin and I'd encourage any woman here having issues with folks harassing and/or being rude. I didn't realize there were any discords or other places where this fetish could be discussed. Depending on the set up, I'd be more willing to chat and not lurk.
On top of women having creep worries, there's a lot of us who also have to worry about this not getting back to bosses for whatever reason. Some folks can feel entitled and want revenge if they feel wronged, which could include trying to find out and notify an employer.
Last, everything I feel being a lady into WAM is doubled by being a black woman into WAM. Some of the rudeness has been due to my skin color and fuck those assholes but still know it's a thing for folks of color.
KittySunshine86 said: We exist!! We also struggle with things like how (if we choose) to tell a partner about this. There's lots of creeps on here but at the same time some of the kindest messages I've gotten on here were from folks that I wasn't friends with on UMD when they messaged/commented. There was the individual who believed I was a man because I dare workout and have athletic arms. Thankfully that issue was handled quickly by an admin and I'd encourage any woman here having issues with folks harassing and/or being rude. I didn't realize there were any discords or other places where this fetish could be discussed. Depending on the set up, I'd be more willing to chat and not lurk.
On top of women having creep worries, there's a lot of us who also have to worry about this not getting back to bosses for whatever reason. Some folks can feel entitled and want revenge if they feel wronged, which could include trying to find out and notify an employer.
Last, everything I feel being a lady into WAM is doubled by being a black woman into WAM. Some of the rudeness has been due to my skin color and fuck those assholes but still know it's a thing for folks of color.
It isn't worth much, but my $.02.
The most valuable two pennies we can ever hope to find.
KittySunshine86 said: being a lady into WAM is doubled by being a black woman into WAM. Some of the rudeness has been due to my skin color and fuck those assholes but still know it's a thing for folks of color.
Anybody who shows any racism here will be banned from the site immediately. Please flag it whenever you see it. Zero tolerance from that, especially on a site run by a black man.
Now I remember WHY I haven't been in the chat here in more years than I can remember. And also why, aside from a couple of friends made over the years of being here from the beginning, why I don't typically message people here with VERY few exceptions. I long ago came to the conclusion that Somewhere Out There; Fate created the Perfect woman for me, and so far I've managed to avoid her- and at this point in my life I don't see that as changing before I go from mowing the grass to pushing it up. So be it.
As for the rest of my gender on here, that's their problem. I am only responsible for MY actions and no one else's. I come here on occasion because I enjoy the sights and in some cases, the company. And in other cases, my views on other issues (like politics, guns, etc.) are certainly made clear I'm more tolerated than welcomed by SOME. And that's fine. Right back at 'em.
But as for the "creep" factor, all I have to add is look around at the rest of society today, ladies, and tell me you can swing a dead cat without hitting at least two of the same type of guys in real life. This place offer a SENSE of anon for SOME people who then let out what they carry around with them in daily life but usually keep hidden for fear of loss of jobs, family, etc. But people are people, and the older I get the more I realize that many of them suck (on BOTH male and female) and you just can't dig an unmarked ditch long enough to hold ALL of them, so either you let it bother you by letting them try to make YOU deal with their shit, or you put them behind you and enjoy what you choose to come here for. Or not; your choice. I make mine each time I come back here. I suggest you do the same.
As I outline in detail in my blogs, my first wetlook experiences started when I was 5 1/2 playing in a lake wearing everyday dresses. As things cooled in the breeze, it caused that sensation I could not understand but have been chasing ever since like the proverbial dragon.
It is clear to me that such connections for any fetish start about age 5 or 6 so it makes sense that there are as many women as men into WAM, wetlook, or any other fetish. I look at things from a very particular POV, and men, don't get me wrong, but here goes:
I have said a million times that the most dangerous animal on Earth is the North American White Male. In the big picture of human evolution, women have been little more than property and playthings. It is just in the past 100 years or so that women have become even close to being equals, and the advent of birth control is more responsible for that than anything else, but we are still 30% smaller and 30% less strong.
In short, women live with a fear that men cannot understand and are easily and quickly overwhelmed by the attention in any form of fetish media. I see it here all the time, that women come and go, lurk and hide and stay relatively quiet as a result. Men can be a bit course but it only takes one to make the rabbit run to her hole.
Personally, I have never had a problem with things like that, and I feel many female wammers do not, but for the most part, women involved in fetishes are just a little gun shy. I like the wording of "god's gift". Its not that we are rare, just more timid than males and that makes it seem like there are less of us.
I mean, once those connections are made at 5 or 6, it's permanent. Being more drawn to women than men and a life long fetishist, I can honestly tell you that is is just as easy to get women involved as it is men. Women just stay in the shadows more. I feel it is an evolutionary thing. Millions of years of instincts can't be wrong.
First off, i just want to say how embarassing it is as a man to have other men act that way towards women. Please try to remember that many of us arent like that and we wont tolerate it around us. Maybe you ladies should out these disrespectful fucks when send you unwanted dick shots or rude.writings and some of us men could call them out for their foul shit. Just an idea. I gotta believe there are other guys on here who feel the same way......whatever the case you beautiful ladies keep doing your thing and know that many of us on here have a deep respect and appreciation of you women who share this fetish with us. Thank you
I would also like to say that the north american white male can be viewed aa thr most dangerous animal in the world by some, but history will also shkw him to be a very creative, kind and strong beast with mountains of accomplishments in his pedigree
As a fellow female wammer, I just wanted to stop by and say a wee bit myself. I've been into wam for a number of years now, I joined this site just over 10 years ago. For the most part, I've had nice messages and comments. However, I still get the odd one that crops up that says he'd like to bang me or words to that effect in the mess displayed in my photos. I've been married for 5 years now and I don't like being spoken to like that.
I have had instances where I've also been particularly annoyed at messages asking me to have a session with them. It's never going to happen. I have said to those inboxing me this but they will continually ask me. I think that's partly the reason that I've not been on here for a while. This is something that I share with my husband, who never heard of wam until we got together.
All I ever look for is a bit of respect from those who either comment or inbox me. After all, we all are humans and don't appreciate being spoken to in any derogatory manner.
Hope you're all keeping well, in spite of the current circumstances.
26WAMGAL said: As a fellow female wammer, I just wanted to stop by and say a wee bit myself. I've been into wam for a number of years now, I joined this site just over 10 years ago. For the most part, I've had nice messages and comments. However, I still get the odd one that crops up that says he'd like to bang me or words to that effect in the mess displayed in my photos. I've been married for 5 years now and I don't like being spoken to like that.
I have had instances where I've also been particularly annoyed at messages asking me to have a session with them. It's never going to happen. I have said to those inboxing me this but they will continually ask me. I think that's partly the reason that I've not been on here for a while. This is something that I share with my husband, who never heard of wam until we got together.
All I ever look for is a bit of respect from those who either comment or inbox me. After all, we all are humans and don't appreciate being spoken to in any derogatory manner.
Hope you're all keeping well, in spite of the current circumstances.
Thank you for checking in, seems we are similar im that my hubby was introduced to wam through me also.
Its good that for the most part you get nice messages and that hopefully those who send the unwelcome messages read this thread and maybe think before they contact you.
I always think the comments that I receive are a possative. I'm on a fetish site posting pics of my body and if someone says they want to bang me like that messy its only going to happen in their mind and I'm flattered that the content I put out there makes them feel that way because I also have the messy fetish and for me it turns me on to think that guys find me sexually attractive when I'm all wet and messy. If I didn't want that attention I wouldn't post messy content. My store allows me to express myself and feed my fetish and exhibitionism it gives others a chance to share in that.
I think there are many measures on this site that do protect females and if someone pissed me off I wouldn't hesitate in telling them to stop messaging me. Report them, contact MM and block them. Sometimes guys will contact a female because they want to sex chat and unless you tell them nope I'm not interested they gonna take a chance.