(To get the background on how I got into WAM -- the prequel to how I met Jen.it's in the non wam forum here on the UMD.)

https://umd.net/forums/robby-the-first-wam-story-jen

So, I'd like to say that my first WAM experience with Jen was earth shattering fun.

But it wasn't. I just didn't get it.and it showed.

However, we kept playing and eventually I figured out what she wantedand then I got pretty good at it.

Of course getting a hand job at the end was quite motivating.

And as it turned out there was an actual reason for that. For Jen, having a guy cumming in their nice clothes was the ultimate humiliation after being clobbered with pies and stuff.

And about those nice clothes..obviously as a poor college student and then well after college I certainly couldn't afford the nice suits Jen wanted me to wear while she was always in incredibly nice dresses and gowns. I eventually learned and actually got to visit Jen's family homeor perhaps I should call it a compound? A villa? Damn it was huge. Turns out Jen family was one of the wealthiest in the state where she grew up so supplying me with clothing was just a "done and done" thing.

It was a shock to me because I never would have guessed she came from that wealthy of a family based on her general behavior, and certainly not what she wore in college which was generally jeans and tshirts during the summer, jeans and sweatshirts during the winter.

But let's flash forward now to when I really believe our entire WAM experiences came together.

It was after college and she would visit Chicago often for weeks at a time to work in her industry and also to see me..and do a WAM scenario or two.

I asked her all the time "Hey how come you never get pied?" Her response with a fake snotty accent was that the "gorgeous girl should never get messy and humiliated."

I asked if that was written in a manual somewhere. One time on a phone call when I asked how come she didn't get messy, she just laughed and said"I'll tell you whatif you feel the urge to let me have it, just do it but don't tell me when."

That seemed fair and so I waited for the "right" time. I didn't do anything the next few times we played hoping she would forget about it.

And then one night..Jen was going to a charity thing and asked if I would set up her hotel room for a WAM scene and that she would leave a tux for me. Her hotel room was more like a suite than a hotel room because of course Jen was Jen and we MUST have space to have fun. Jen often liked the "reality" feel of going to a party, a banquet or in this case a big charity to doand THEN coming back and doing a scene with me. It felt more real to her if she was wearing for our "scenes" exactly what she was wearing to go "out." She actually had a name for it. She called our play sessions "Personal Theater." Made it sound kind of classy.

So there I was as usual setting up the room after having made 10 pies. Back in those days we weren't actually throwing pies, just smooshing them. We would use the old Pet Ritz cream pies plus a combo of "pudding pies" with cool whip. I also would use strawberry syrup as the bottom of the strawberry pudding pies. Jen really liked the mess those made on me especially in a light colored suit.

So as I'm putting on my tux I decide tonight is going to be the night I nail her with a pie. And I'm thinking to myselfmaybe two? And I actually got "excited" thinking about it.which was also a first. I was about to REALLY become a "Wammer." Again, THAT term didn't exist in my mind because I hadn't heard it yet and probably because it didn't exist yet.

And then I started to get a feeling of "excited anticipation" in a way I had never felt before. It was almost what you might call a "good nervousness."

As I heard her keys rattle around before she came in the door, I became REALLY nervous and wondered "is this what she feels like before she pies me?" And then as she entered I just froze.

Made up as usual head to toe and wearing (gulp) a long WHITE flowing evening gown that had kind of a white sheen on top and below her knees. The top criss crossed across her chest and then the same around her back. Really? I was going to do it this time?

One of our standard "scenes" was me thinking I was going to get laid and then paying the humiliation price for thinking that.

She comes in and says "do you think this going to be your lucky nighthmmmm?"
She then put her hand on the front of my pants and said "Ooooohsomeone is already excited."
Now you KNOW you shouldn't be thinking that. I think it's time to teach your another lesson.

And with that she picked up one of the "strawberry pies." "Awwww, this is going to make a mess of that nice tux" she said and she held up the pie right by my face." "I love strawberry pies" she said. And I said "Good because there are two of them."

And then I just made the decision to do it. I grabbed the pie from her, which I had done before but it still always end up in my face. But not this time. As I grabbed it from her this time you could see her eyes get wide and she said "Oh now wait..I know I said, but you're not going to." And the pie hit her square in the face.

I was still shaking and she looked at me but I couldn't see anything because her face was totally covered in red strawberry goo and crust. It was already falling down onto her dress when she screamed.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO you didn't!!!!!" "In a white dress? In a fucking white dress?????"

And I said lamely "well, at least it's not on your shoes." "It could be worse"

She grabbed another pie and said "I'll show you worse"

But I grabbed that pie too and just as she said "What are you doing?" I smooshed that one in your face too..a little harder this time.

She was silent for a few seconds as the chocolate of this pie went across her face and her hair. Then she looked at her dress and then screamed "ARRRRRGHGHG.what have you done? Look at me!"

I couldn't believe that I was standing there all clean and she was the one with strawberry and chocolate hanging off her hair and face and dripping down on her gown.

Then I started laughing and said "Ha ha! You finally got your just desserts."

She started wiping off the pie from her face and also taking it out from the front of her hair and then said: "You like desserts? Let's have some desserts"

And she picked up two pies and nailed me in the face with the first and plopped the second one on top of my head. The pie tin sat on top of my head for a few seconds before she knocked it off and then said:

"Strawberry and chocolate on a white dress? Are you crazy?"

Then she picked up a pie and said "Is there another strawberry one?" and smashed it in my face.

"Nope" she said "Another chocolate one."

"How about this one Mr. Pieboy?" as she smashed another chocolate pie in my face.

"What's the matter. You don't like chocolate?" And she smashed yet another one in my face.

My face and head were now immersed in chocolate as she smeared chocolate all over the front of my tux and down my front. She then took a handful of chocolate from the floor pulled my pants forward and stuffed it down.

"How does that feel Mr. Pie?" "Hmmmmm?"

"Well" I said, bending down to pick up a handful of goo. "You tell me"

As I grabbed the top of her dress she said "oh nowait."and raised her hands to her chest to stop me but it was too late, I was already gently patting it in to the top and just above the waist of her dress and then rubbing it up and down. Her eyes closed and her hands went out to her sides as I was rubbing. And all I could think of was "this is NOT coming out of this dress."

When I was done she said: "Are you done now? Feel better?" "You know, I wonder where that other strawberry pie is. Let's look". And she grabbed the back of my head by the hair and quickly walked me over to the table and lined up 3 pies and as she "dunked" me in the first one said "Is that one it?" and rubbed my face around in it.

And she picks my head up and looks at my face and says "Nope. Let's trying another one." And she dunks my face in the second one the same way and pulls me out and says "Nopewell there's only one left." And she picks it up and slams it in my face.

"Yep, that's the strawberry one" she says. Is it tasty?

Now I'm just standing there dripping in gooand she says "aww, are you all gooey? Let's make you more gooey" And she pulls down my pants and I expect her to start rubbing the front of my silk boxers. But as she puts her hand there she slips (or pretended to slip) and is now almost right up against me and I'm up against a wall and so I pulled her against me. She looked surprised but played along and actually started pushing into me as she said "Nodon't you dare. Don't you dare cum on me." But after about another 20 seconds I do exactly that as she makes sounds I hadn't heard her make before. And then before I know it, we are both holding on to each other barely able to stand. And she looks at me and says "What the hell was THAT?" "II'm not sure. I said. Was it bad?" "Bad? She said. It was fucking incredible. I didn't now you would be willingI meanI wasn't surebut holy shit."

And then she looks at her dress and says "but maybe next time in a LESS EXPENSIVE dress YOU ASSHOLE!"

And then she laughed.

I just fell down.



WAM NOTES:

Note 1:

(Jen and I WAMed together many times over the years stopping in the late 1990's because she got married and worse I actually KNEW the guy she married so I felt uncomfortable continuing. We still talk all the time but virtually never about WAM. We both have great memories. Not much more we could ask for. Ironically, over the years it also became a turn on in a way for Jen not to know IF she was going to get pied. Like me at that time she learned to love the "nervous anticipation" of not knowing IF, WHEN or HOW.

Note 2:

Even with my library "reading" Jen and I used to think we were the ONLY ones into what we were doing. Everyone once in a while we'd laugh because we would imagine some other couple in some remote part of the world doing it. Like some remote section of Norway.

I still remember the night Jen called me at about 1am literally screaming into the phone."IT'S NOT JUST US!!!!" She had been on that internet thing I had heard about and discovered the world of WAM that did not yet have a name but was obviously enjoyed by many others.
And with that phone call my world and life changed.

Next week: "It Gets Wet In Austin With No Rain"

Great story thanks for sharing.

First off. I eagerly await each chapter in your story!

Secondly.....curious....where exactly did you cum on her? Inquiring minds want to know.

I can't believe how often I"m getting asked this question...lol.

Imagine "dry humping." and you should get the proper visual and bodily geographic location. Imagine having actual sex....but with clothes on. Over the years I have been amazed how much certain women seem to enjoy it. Now, I don't think for a second it's as enjoyable to them as actual sex but it does seem to play into the whole WAM "experience." Although "dry" is certainly a misnomer in the case of WAM.

Jen's "don't you dare cum on me" was the equivalent of her making me cum in nice suits and tuxes, except in her mind, the humilation would then equally be on her....literally.

To be clear, we didn't start out playing that way. It just became something that evolved that way after that night. Although there were certain scenes where that didn't occur because she didn't alwayis get messy in our "playtime." Sometimes it was still just a handjob.

I hope that made sense.

You do realize you found a unicorn with this woman, right?

Like you could be close friends with 500 other women and the chances of them being into WAM *and* initiating sessions.... would probably still be 0%.

Anyway. Really enjoying these stories. Also I now know why all the WLP women had to be wearing nice clothes. Keep 'em coming!

Welllllllllllllllllllll, yes and no.

I actually have run into a number of women who actually "enjoy" the same thing...which granted is "unicornish" in and of itself.

I doubt any of them EXCEPT Jen would have shared it with me. THAT is what made Jen unusual. Which was part of the reason I liked her so much. No pretense. She was just who she was...period.

And yes, that's the reason women were dressed up in all the videos...because of Jen. But NOT in the way you think. It wasn't because it was a turn on for me, it was because of something Jen told me once.

I once asked her the same question..."Why always the fancy clothes?"

And she said it just extended the "humorous humiliation exponentially." And yes that is EXACTLY what she said. I'll never forget it. And then she added "Have you NEVER seen a 3 Stooges piefight?" She was right. The "hoity toity" always get pies in the face right? And they are almost always dressed up...right? Hence, why WLP videos and SPTG videos were always "dress up" affairs. Back then, the scripts AND the clothes were what differentiated the vids from other vids. So there was a "business" component to it as well.

WAM Analysis 101 is now concluded for the day.

This absolutely blows my mind. A beautiful woman attending a charity event and asking me to setup for a WAM scene her hotel room, including her having a tux waiting for me to put on. Then coming up to the room after just to humiliate me and glop me up because it's a turn on for HER.

Apart from talking about the 3 Stooges, did Jen ever delve further into where the kink came from? Or was it just that simple explanation?

After you finished the scene would she ever do anything to get off or was it just her planning on pleasing herself once you left?

Did she ever film you?

Does she know about WLP and where you took the kink?

Sorry for all the questions. Happy to wait if any answers are coming in future entries. I would honestly be happy just reading about more if your exploits with Jen. Never really had a fantasy of a woman messing me up but that is no longer the case.

How could you let her get away???

I mentioned this is the opening NON WAM forum piece. She used to think about it a lot apparently until one of her psyche professors told her and others obviously in a class that we are all wired differently. Which, if you consider the amount of kinks out there and the insane number of people into EVERYTHING makes perfect sense.

I suppose we could all spend some time in therapy to analyze where our kinks come from, but in OUR case with WAM, since it's so exceptionally tame (unless it actually interferes with your life) she just figured why bother?

And yes...especially once she started getting messy more...the more she would get off right after I did especially if I was holding her. I don't remember her EVER going first though..lol.

In the early days we never recorded our encounters because there was no easy way to do so.Home based recorders weren't in stores yet. (Yes, i'm old). We DID start recording our "encounters" toward the last few years at my suggestion. But we never watched them....lol..at least Jen didn't. She didn't want to change what we were doing based on "how it looked on cam." She had a good point.

And absolutely she knew about WLP and often had suggestions. No, she's never been on the UMD. And quite honestly she saw where "the kink" was going before I did. Jen was and is a VERY bright woman and back in the mid 90's saw where the internet was going before most.

Also, one other tidbit...when Jen got married as I mentioned and I didn't feel comfy "playing" after that, she was the one who told me emphatically that If I wanted to find other woman to "play" it wouldn't be difficult BUT I had to be honest and direct and of course be someone who they WANTED to "play" with. She was right. But it is VERY difficult for most people to do.

I just decided as I said above that it was such a goofy, harmless AND relatable kink that I would give it a shot. Obviously it was easy with some of the WLP models because they already were aware of it. The "challenge" was....could I interest other women in it?

As you'll see in upcoming weeks, the answer to that was a very clear "yes."

She was never "mine" to begin with. No more than the fact that we both loved fishing made her "mine" to begin with. I know that sounds like a goofy comparison, but for us, it was apt.

We had a kink, we both liked in various ways. It worked. But marriage? Not a chance. We just didn't have THAT kind of friendship. We were the DEFINITION of "friends with benefits."

And we still talk all the time...just not about WAM.

She had a love for fishing and wam, some men can only dream lol!

What a story. I was getting aroused just reading it. Lol

Ironically, we went fishing a few times before she ever told me about pieplay.

She grew up with a bass pond "next door."

Great, I'm now Viagra for the UMD.

Great story, thank you for sharing this.

Don't sell yourself short.

You're the E.L. James of the UMD.

Absolutely LOVE this chapter. What you had really was a unicorn situation. Not many people can do the friends with benefits thing all kink aside without someone getting hurt. Does Jen still get messy or are those days gone?

For years I went out of my way to never ask her. Until she asked me "how come you never ask if (name) and I do what you and I did?"

Apparently they do but with HIS kink (whatever that is) added in.

Again, I still don't want to know..lol.

Amazing story. Man, the years certainly fly by. I remember speaking with Robby on an AOL forum way back when. I still remember your AOL screen name.

Oh man, that IS way back. Yep, it was Segit1@aol.com which by the way was given to me by........Jen. (Long, boring story).

It was likely an AOL chat room which unlike me Jen HATED with a passion, lol. I saw the chat room as the future, and sure enough AOL chat rooms morphed into Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and other platforms.

I still maintain quijte a few friendship from those rooms both social and business.

Great stories!

Another fantastic piece of writing Robby, I'm loving these weekly installments.

It might just be me, but I'd love to hear more about your initial session/s with Jen, how she dealt with you not getting it at first, and how it then evolved to the point where you figured out what she wanted.

It's not just you, Chap! I'd love to hear those kind of details as well!

Not to take away from the robby's story or Rich's positive comment, but I just wanna take the opportunity real quick to help dispel this myth that women aren't into this fetish.

Please see attached screenshots.

Literally in the last 24 hours alone, I've had 4 conversations with women who are into this...

Two are models I've shot with that want to do it again (and both have done messy stuff in their personal lives as well as on their onlyfans since our first shoot), and the other two are new and reached out because it's something they're interested in.

And then there's the dozen close female friends I chat with all the time about slime, not to mention the countless female partners I've dated, almost all of which ended up covered in green slop, and nearly all of them were at the very least open to it, and most have been able to find some element of it that turns them on (usually the role playing aspect, or the humiliation).

If you think that women aren't into this kink, then you're just not talking to enough (or the right) women.

Good point Kelsey - I know I've been guilty of foolish thinking on this front myself in the past.

There's an interesting thread currently on the non-wam forum which also demonstrates very clearly how lots of women can be interested in this fetish in various ways: https://umd.net/forums/unicorns-and-real-life

They are NOT supposed to like it!!! Thats the point.

And now you are getting into another entire area via role play which for some makes no difference whatsoever, but for many it's a deal breaker.

For me without role play and proper "reaction", it's just throwing food on people. I don't have a clue why it's that way for me or why it's purely visual for others.

Jen, also needed the role play.

Very excited for the 3rd installment Robby - will it be this weekend?

Twill be this Saturday. And I promise not to use the word "Twill".

Keep it going