How did your partner react after telling them about your wam obsession?

I'm sure most of us on here can agree that opening up to someone about our wam kink isn't a easy thing to do haha

but I'm curious to hear anyone's else's experiences about reviling ur secret to someone for the first time and how did they respond to it?

After I came out to my boyfriend and told him about wam, he said 'Oh, I guess we can do it in the shower'. i dunno if that's good or bad.

Slapstickstuff's content has been a great reference point for potential messy partners.

The responses range from "Um, ok, I guess?" to "Sure, sounds fun!" My tastes are relatively softcore in the WAM world so the pop culture knowledge of a pie in the face or getting slimed is an easier sell than, say, Mr. MG's HGB. Sell isn't even the right word, really...I'm not persuading, my goal is just to be candid and open with a partner and to do the same with them. In several cases, they already get it and will respond to the conversation about getting pied with their feelings (positive or negative) about potentially also getting slimed.

I've also tested the waters with a sort of potential partner/friend who was absolutely enthusiastic about getting CLOBBERED with a dozen+ pies, but she lived several hours away, life circumstances prevented us from getting together, and we've since we found other people and are happy. Still, one wonders about what might have been!

Kinda happened gradually.

I don't know how it came up but there was a video of a contestant in the water balloon game on Ellen who gets absolutely soaked in a t shirt dress and I was like oh yeah I thought that was hot hehe.

Couple months later we go to happy hour with friends and she wears her clothes from summer school that day (black maxi dress and sandals). Come back and she's had a few and when she goes to shower before we make dinner she gets in with the dress still on. At the time she was like oh yeah I thought it would be funny and didn't expect you to get hard so fast seeing me in the wet dress but later on she was like I had a feeling it might turn you on.

Explored the wet dress thing more. Had a work trip last spring and the night after I came back we had a date night and she was like "I'm wearing a maxi dress and after we get back you can mess me up in it however you want to." Date night was great, messing up was.. not.

End consensus: she's not into it whatsoever beyond wearing a dress in the shower, but she fully supports me being into it and fully encourages me buying scenes/customs and has actually said I should download Onlyfans and see what kind of stuff I can find there.

I'm generally pretty open about it when going over kinks, which is something I always like to do early in a relationship. As of yet, I've only had one partner who expressed zero interest. The rest were at least curious, and at most, totally into it after being introduced.

It's been a mixed bag, but never keep it to yourself!

My experience has been mixed.

I'll lead off by stating that I have always had a pie fetish. Originally, it was limited to seeing women pied, but that has evolved into having them pie me, also.

I always tried to approach the topic with discretion and caution. It's not something I would just blurt out or start discussing on a first date, when I was dating.

If my relationship reached a level where we were discussing turn-ons, and if I felt like I could trust the person, I would bring it up.

Most of the time, I would get fairly positive reactions, and often more questions. Many were genuinely surprised and a bit curious. Some thought it was a little strange, but I don't recall any hard "no's" when I was dating.

I found that allowing a woman to pie me first, without any concern of me reciprocating immediately, was helpful. A few women were okay with being pied, and one in particular allowed me to pie her quite often as part of our sex life. She was a lot of fun. I even asked her once if she minded participating so much, and she shrugged and said, "It's just a pie in the face. It's not like you want to shit on me or something."

However, as fate would have it, I ended up marrying a woman who has literally ZERO interest in participating in any way. There was a brief period about 5 years ago where she tried it in order to make me happy, but she just wasn't into it. No need to go into details. She just doesn't like it.

So, like I said, it's been a mixed bag.

Hmmm.

It's why I have an ex-wife

I wrote a story a few years ago that is a barely-fictionalized version of when I told my now-wife about my pie kink.

Here ya go: https://umd.net/stories/the-pie-couple

I opened up to my partner pretty early on.

She asked if I'd ever paid for sex (I haven't), I made a quip about the kinky stuff being more expensive which lead to her quizzing me on my kinks.

I explained sploshing and my love of gunge from the context of 80s style mud wrestling, but with psychedelic colours. She was pretty open and understanding of my fetish. Not enthusiastic, but also not revolted either.

What I never expected was her to Google the subject when she got home; having misstyped it as "splooshing" and got a bunch of very different messy results to what I'd described.
She then found some splosh videos of lesbians eating chocolate cake off each other's asses and was thoroughly grossed out by it, as it looked like a scat scene.

After showing me the video (I needed to suffer too), I shared a few scenes on here which I really enjoyed. When then lead to us booking a hotel room together, and popping her gunge cherry.
In her words "This stuff is fucking magic!!"

Told my wife (now ex wife) right after I proposed, maybe a couple weeks. I kinda over hyped it and allowed her imagination to run wild. Leaning into the ides that I thought it was pretty bad and embarrassing but I needed her to know before we got married. So when I came clean to her she was like "Do you want to shove cream pies into my face? That's it?! Oh thank god. I thought it was gonna be something FAR worse." So that strategy seemed to work.

I've only had one girlfriend, a and a month and a half fling with another girl. I told my ex about it pretty esrly on, and she wasn't very receptive to it. We never really talk much about it after that.

The girl I had a fling with, however, was very open to getting messy, and we nearly bought some gunge for her to get cover in. That never happened, though, as we both lived with our respective parents at the time. I don't talk to her anymore, let alone want to be friends with her (it's a whole thing), so I'll never be getting her messy.

I struggle to look for a girlfriend these days; partly due to work (new job should help that), but also because of the content I make. I wouldn't really want to stop making the videos, and if I got with someone, I'd be open about this. A bonus would be her getting involved with the videos.

I never really discussed it with her. I kept it to a porn level. But one night she wanted to turn me into an ice cream sundae. We indulged that for a few years until I brought up doing more. Now we have a large corner TV cabinet full of toys and storable sweets.

Closest I ever got was bringing up using whipped cream or chocolate syrup and licking it off her boobs, which is really no where near where I really WANTED to go with WAM, but you gotta start small. She seemed receptive to it, but nothing ever came of it.

I wish I wasn't so awkward so I could have a girlfriend and open up to them about this...it's just not in the cards for me. I've only had one serious relationship that lasted 2 years in my life, and that was over 20 years ago. I'm old. After that a few relationships I wanted to last but only lasted a couple months. I get crushed way too easily. Now I've been single something like 15 years. I'm pretty much content with it, but at the same time there will always be that longing. I'm a third shifter, have a shitty tiny one person condo, and I don't want to even attempt to make any changes in all of that to accommodate a relationship...it's all too much...I just need a "for fun" partner, but knowing me I'd get attached and make more out of that and ruin it...so yea, unfortunately...nothing from me.

Anytime ive brought it up to a potential partner, I pretty much get one of three responses.
1. "Fuck it lets get messy"
2."Eh not my thing but I am down to get you messy, since you like it"
3."No I dont wanna get sticky or messy not my thing but good for you"

Never had someone reject for liking wam which is nice that it was never a dealbreaker.

Rather than repost what has already been written, here are some other threads pertaining to partner response.

https://umd.net/forums/should-you-reveal-your-fetish

https://umd.net/forums/mud-dillemma--bad-outcome

In a nutshell, your mileage may vary, it all depends on the milndset of both you and your partner. You come out about your fetish for your own peace of mind, sometimes doing so works out for the better.

I haven't opened up (yet) as such, but I think my partner and I are going to be starting a WAM journey together.

I have been a messy pie guy for a very long time. Always kept it secret. I have been in a relationship with my partner for over 20 years. He is amazing. I have always indulged his kinks.

Last night we were watching porn together in bed. He had subscribed to a gay porn star and we were jerking and stroking each other. He then scrolled down through the many videos to a video that was totally WAM- two naked guys pieing and sliming each other and then fucking. He wanted to watch it! I felt nervous! But anyway, we started watching it and we both got into it big time. I let him take the lead. He then asked for lube and massage oil (presumably as an alternative to pies and slime hahaha) and we coveredand massaged each other and played around. It was so good!

He even joked about us buying a paddling pool and getting messy! He really is an amazing guy.

It has spun me out a bit. I couldn't sleep that night thinking of all the fantasies we could do together. I always thought WAM was my thing, my secret kink which I enjoyed very rarely with other guys, or watched and bought content on umd (with a lot of fear/shame that i will get caught) but I am thinking now that this is something we can share and develop further in our relationship and in our sex life.

I wonder if he is on here or will eventually read this! Hahah

I am a very lucky guy

You can experiment by telling trusted friends before telling a partner, as they're not going to be involved so the stakes are lower. A couple of my female friends I told thought it sounded fun, but one was concerned it was wasteful, and the other was worried about her hair getting messy but fine with the idea of it on her body.

I've only had three long term relationships.

The first sort of evolved from a friendship where we got talking about messy stuff somehow, and she admitted that she'd love to take a bath in shaving foam. Well, I was going to be the man to make that happen - we hooked up a couple of months later and did it. We dated for about 2 years and had several messy sessions - eventually the relationship died because it was essentially based on sex, and lacked real love.

The second was my first love. We had a great friendship but she was wild in bed too - a total nymphomaniac. She wanted to please me and was up for anything I could think of. My only regret is that I held back out of trying to "do the right thing" and not take advantage of her drive. But I did cover her in lots of gooey stuff, and she was game, even though it wasn't specifically her fetish. Sadly I blew it with her, won't go into detail but my own stupid fault.

The final one was my wife. Again, WAM was not her thing but she didn't mind that it was mine, and humoured me with getting slightly messy on a couple of occasions, but eventually she declared that it wasn't for her and she didn't want to do it anymore. Between that and kids coming along, our sex life has completely dried up now, and I miss the times with my nympho ex girlfriend.
I fear I'll never have sex with a woman again - things aren't bad enough for me to leave my wife, but not good enough for me to be truly happy. I'm just going with the flow. I just get messy on my own whenever she's away, and keep my solo sessions a secret.

I think I'm lucky, in that my WAM kink is about tactile slippery sensations, not humiliation/role play, and my preferred substances are mud, oil and lube. I think plenty of people get that oil and lube feel good, although mud might be more of a leap!

I've only had one serious girlfriend and she was pretty open to it. We already shared other tactile kinks such as spandex, satin and body contact/"humping", so it was a natural progression and she enjoyed adding lube to our spandex play etc. She wasn't interested in outdoor mud stuff though, which is fair enough.

I haven't had any other serious relationships as I prefer meeting people for shared kink interests

I got very lucky with my first partner that it happened organically. We had some whipped cream and chocolate syrup that we were using on a dessert that we started lightly putting on each other. I was trying to be funny and smacked a glob of whipped cream in her face and next thing I know we're rushing down to the shower with the bottles and going to town on each other with them.

Turns out we were both into getting messy but we hadn't realized it as a kink until we tried it together. I've posted some details a few times before but sploshing became a big part of our relationship.

Definitely haven't experienced that kind of luck since then lol. A later partner told me that her kinks involved getting messy but she wouldn't really elaborate when I asked about it, even after I told her I felt the same. She had some life challenges that made it very difficult for us to get a chance to try anything and she wasn't very into it the one time we did do something, so that kind of was that. Feels kind of like a lost opportunity but I tried.

Otherwise, I haven't brought it up much with most of my partners, either out of nervousness or not really wanting to. I've done a few minor messy things with others here and there. My current partner seems like she would be into it in the "it's not exactly my thing, but I'm down to do it for you" kind of way, so I may give that a shot.

Kind of funny how with some partners, I did want to try sploshing with and I had no desire to with others. Anyone else feel like that?

I was a long time WAM fan when I met my (future) wife.
I tried to be discreet, but it was really built into our relationship from the start.
The first time we had sex was after a bath in t-shirts.
In retrospect, I can see that from early on the issue was unresolved.
She would please me, now and again.
But what she really wanted was just intimacy and straight sex.
A very wise member here explained to me, some time ago,"If you love your fetish more than your partner, they will soon pick up on this!"
So, as the pressures of life exceeded the joys, our relationship foundered.
This was long before UMD and the internet.
If I had been lucky enough to meet and marry a Wammer, would it have been different?
Not sure.
But thanks to everyone here who shares happiness now.
Peter

My wife just accepted it part of our sexual relations-she's not a great fan of WAM but is okay about it and participates for me-I then reciprocate and do some things that she likes to do.Called give and take in a relationship and for us, works well.As long as it's her I'm covering in mud,she's happy.

Never have, wish I could...but it's just kept locked in a very secure, separate, locked compartment of my life. Not great, but I just can't see it changing.

We met at a munch, and *immediately* clicked. 'Love at first sight' sounds cheesy as heck but we were definitely on the same wavelength like nothing else I've ever experienced.

I invited her for, well, it was *supposed* to just be a sleepover. Maybe we'd watch anime, eat pizza. Genuinely. Just something like that. There were *supposed* to be a couple more people!

But they dropped out on the day, so it ended up being just the two of us. And we talked and we talked and laughed and joked, and amongst the kinks I mentioned was this - my first, and deepest, and by far the silliest - and she laughed, because it's silly, and said it sounded fun. I said I had some custard in the cupboard if she was that keen.

She was. So was I.

She stayed over.

It's been over a decade now.

Until recently I thought she was into it because *I* was into it, which is fine - it was at Splat in June and during those giggles I finally came to the realisation that she legit enjoys it herself too.

So, uh... it went pretty well.

It's just a kink, like any other, except a pretty harmless and silly one! Don't be weird, there's really no reason to hide it from someone you trust and love, just ... be open if it's important to you and share it and maybe they like it or don't, and that's cool..

That's absolutely gorgeous. How cool is this?!

Were you at the Splat event today?

Pretty cool!


Not this one, sadly - couldn't make it - but hopefully if there's another! (We were both at the June one - we were the two in latex!)

This is so true, and really important to remember. My wife and I have been "sploshing" for twenty years, and when discussing why I find it so exciting - because it is my kink not hers - she's laughingly said on a number of occasions "Oh, but really, it could have been so much worse "

I can't remember exactly how I admitted it to her. It did take me until a year or two into our relationship before I felt I could, though she's sometimes said since "I don't know why it took you so long". We took what we actually did fairly gradually at first - I think the very first messy thing we did was simply me licking chocolate sauce from her fingers, but it progressed fairly rapidly once she saw how much fun I found it, and over the years since there's not much that we haven't covered each other with prior to sex at one point or another. I said it's my kink not hers, and to begin with she said how she liked doing it because of how excited it made me, but I think she now also genuinely enjoys the slippery sensations that go along with a session - after all, who wouldn't(!) - even though she's not getting the visual excitement from a "trashing" that I get.

My (now ex) wife was totally into trying it. We had about 8 really full on messy sessions involving all kinds of food, always culminating in sex. For a few sweet years, I lived my WAM dream.