Unlike a lot of us, you have a lovely, sexy wife who indulges you (Note beautiful woman in his profile pic. )

I've loved seeing the great pics you posted over the years. Is there anything new that you can share with those of us who are married and their wives hate wam? (The rest of you would be welcome to look, too! )

[ I don't want to hijack the thread; if you have anything you're willing to share, please post in a new thread. Besides, it'll be easier to find that way! ]

Norman

It's hard not to imagine producers giving a few extra $ to get a fuck at the end of the shoot, but nothing that really bugs me. If you're feeling lonely and that I'd honestly just searching up kinky chicks on dating sites like okcupid. I got into a chat with one and fell for her as soon as she said "hair washes off" in response to me telling her I never thought it would be possible to find someone who would get their hair really messy.

Very, very unlikely. The only circumstance where sex is likely to follow a shoot would be if the producer and model are already a couple - any producer propositioning a model with that kind of offer is liable to find themselves at best being labelled as a dangerous creep on every modelling site, which will completely kill their career as a WAM producer - and anyone who tried to push it would be looking at assault charges.

I'm pretty sure I speak for most producers in this - shoots are kept strictly professional. Even though WAM is my fetish, when shooting I'm so busy paying close attention to capturing the scene fully, framing, lighting, are the parts of the models being gunged from moment to moment facing the camera, can the camera clearly see the money shots, is the framing right, keeping background clutter or other crew members out of the shot, keeping the lights out of the shot, keeping my own shadow out of the shot - there's actually no time to even think about anything sexual much less react to it. Watching and enjoying comes afterwards, going through the footage and editing it, when the models have left the premises.

If a producer ever tried that with me Id get in touch with every model I know to let them know the guy is a fucking dangerous unprofessional creep! I don't know a single wam model (out of about 25 or so now) that would be okay with that in any way shape or form. Im a bit blown away that you think that's standard practice and part of what models, wam or otherwise, do.

As far as a reply on topic. You are 21. Live, be happy, be positive, and the rest will fall into place. Negativity and desperation (not saying you are those things) ooze from people's pores. Frankly that's really unattractive to anyone, male, female, and anywhere in between.

Ask the wrong one and you'll find out how a pissed of dad or boyfriend will act.

Asking college girls to be prostitutes is all kinds of ethically fucked up. Why would you encourage someone like that?

That's one way to have a pissed of boyfriend with a baseball bat come find you I suppose.

Assuming the model hasn't already stabbed you of course.

Aaaaaaaand... we have a winner.

Unethical is definitely the word for it. This is like that thread about "what annoys you in porn" or whatever it was called. There is most certainly an ethical and unethical way to produce. To find people desperate for cash in a bad situation and exploit produces "dead eye" sad results. Not to mention the fact exploiting people in times of being down is absolutely appalling on so many levels. If someone is having a hard time and you want to help them, do it because you want to be a good person and give someone a helping hand back up, not to be the biggest type of shitbag and hit someone when they are down for your own selfish needs. And people wonder why women may take a while to trust. This is sadly all too common a way of thinking for some people. Ugh. Sorry. I had to come back to this. Just made me feel all icky inside reading that crap advice.

I would say you need to take care of your emotional needs before you go back to shooting.

As far as lonely, I have been there. It took me a long time of shopping and investigating and being cautious, but I found someone on craigslist that was very safe. When she was in town she would text me and I would come over for an on the clock wam session. We talked here and there after the session and what not, but it was strictly business. Yes I knew I was paying for a service, but it did help me not feel lonely and enjoy the fetish instead of it being something that tortured me. There are sites out there like TER that you can use to make sure you contact someone reputable, or safe. Look for keywords like fetish friendly. Investigate some and call or text them. I think a lot of them mean more domination or foot play, but there are a few out there that are wam friendly. I paid for all the supplies and any clothing that was damaged. I spent about 200 or so when I did it. Looking back on it, I could have done it cheaper by buying the pudding for the pies in bulk. There are sites that will sell number 10 cans of pudding a lot cheaper than the milk and boxes. I used empty pie tins and then some whip cream on top. The first time, she used her own clothing and I gave her some more money as some of it got ruined. Also, set ground rules. Find out what is ok and what is not. Find out what you can expect from the experience.

Also get out of your apartment. I promised myself that no matter what every friday I would go see a movie. I saw some great movies and some shitty movies, but I always saw one a week.

Good luck man. You are 21 you will be fine. Don't rush anything as you might ruin a possible friendship and your reputation.

Exactly. It's highly unprofessional to assume every model or even most are prostitutes. And an actual escort isn't going to fuck you for a few extra bucks, they charge a lot more than a model.

I highly agree with this. My best relationships were the ones that just happened by chance and were people that made me feel happy, not because they were perfect but because they inspired me to be the best version of myself. None of them ever shared my kinks but in the long run that's just a superficial difference that doesn't matter.

I just wanted to take a moment to say a big thank you to everyone who has replied so far. It really means a lot to know other people get it. When you've got a massive collection, but you realize you want to just be happily connected to someone.

Posting this took a lot for me, because I had just been so down it was paralyzing. I know I want someone who shares it with me. I've dated a couple girls who would indulge me, but it was fake. I want someone to enjoy wam with.

I like to always return the favor, so if any of you guys ever need anything at all or just want to talk about anything going on in your lives, I'll be here. I'll appreciate the company for sure.

Id also like to add that a large chunk of my professional background is in cyber security. I know of two producers on here that have serious security flaws on their websites. I've reached out to both with no response. If you want me to do a security audit of your website, I will do it free of charge. Consider it my contribution since I haven't been able to make any marketable content.

Can't speak for other producers, but I don't hire prostitutes.

EDIT: Kudos to others for slamming down this ridiculous comment before me.

This thread is a perfect mix of pity party and Misogyny.

Quick tip: if eating while driving arrange for the tap on the head signal of we are are about to die because I am about to squirt. Again you are 21. I so wish I could go back to then. My apology for joking about your situation. Your picture shows your a good looking guy Just chill a bit. Feeling lonely will happen throughout your life. Sometimes even when surrounded by family and friends. Just be you, from this thread you seem a good guy. If you were in my neighborhood I'd invite your out for a brew. Feel free to pm if you want a online friend.. Anyways, stay strong your 21 for gods sake. You have 20, 30, 40, 50 hopefully 100 years of good and bad friendships ahead of you.

Not much more to add to the above, save for the one quote I so often find myself returning to:

"Somewhere out there; Fate has created the perfect woman for me. So far, I have managed to avoid her."

Having made a lap around your age and then some, I would suggest that you not let your present define your future expectations whether that applies to love, relationships, friendships, women in general, or pretty much anything. All you have now is the perspective of all you have now. That WILL, in time, become expanded. Just be paying attention so as not to miss too much of it when it passes by you.

Clearly you need to get out and do things. That's a way to meet friends of either sex. What do you like to do? If you are near a college, check out whatever form of media at the school that tells students what to do on weekends. Maybe it's the college newspaper. Volunteer for something. See if there's a local hiking club. Get a cheap gym membership and use it -- if you're in front of a computer a lot this is a good idea in any event.

I never had luck in bars. Some people do, but I am not sure it's worthwhile. Plus if you are there having a few drinks then you have to be careful you're not over the limit.

So I think the first thing is to ask yourself -- what activities might you be interested in? Try out some local group that does those things. And go just to make friends, with guys or girls. Be friendly. Once you start enjoying something with other people, friendships should blossom. And by hanging around with other guys, you'll possibly meet females they know.

You know, maybe part of it, is that I can't find a woman with this shared interest... Ya know? Not that it's big, but most girls don't even wanna try it.

My advice is don't try to find a woman with "this shared interest"... female wammers are out there, but they're much fewer in numbers than male wammers, who are already statistically quite rare. So it's pretty much a needle in the haystack proposition to find a female wammer out there in the so-called "real world." And even if you DID, you'd have WAM in common, and quite possibly nothing else. Which would probably lead to some fun nights, but would probably end pretty quickly and leave you feeling lonely again.

I think, as a few others have already said above, that the best approach is to look for a woman that you are compatible with generally, in a situation where there is a mutual attraction. If you then get to the point where you become intimate for a few months, you then bring this up with her as a special thing you'd really like to try with her. If she likes you, she'll very likely be interested in the things that turn you on...and she'll likely be much more receptive to the idea of at least trying WAM than a woman who you've just met would be when approached "cold" with the idea.

I'm a gentleman, I always work up to things like that. I still do traditional courtship. Still, you're right. It's extremely rare, but one day I'll find it.

Reply to Jason K416 : I may have recommended an "escort" -- a paid (independent) professional -- but I am not intentionally trying to promote prostitution, per se; that said, one could got to Nevada where it is legal, or Amsterdam, or Thailand....there's nothing "wrong" with this type of activity (if it's legal, and, if the girl is not being trafficked or pimped, or too young -- likely pimped)...one should engage this type of business arrangement responsibly....

...rather, I meant to recommend an arrangement for fetish kink fun (not necessarily involving sex -- one could simply excuse ones self, head to the bathroom, and masturbate)...Many escorts have limits to sexual contact. Perhaps the boy needs a dominatrix?

I was trying to present options (and outlets for sexual frustration)....it can be healthy to act out a fantasy scenario (with agreed to limits) and also discover what it is that makes you aroused, with a person with whom you have no emotional attachment...this can help prepare you for a real relationship where two people share their erotic fantasy lives...

....in a way, it is no different from having a sexual relationship (more than one, hopefully) before you get married...so that one does not enter into this relationship blind, inexperienced, and overly prone to making mistakes...this also helps a guy (or girl) become less possessive and foolish when and if that relationship ends.

I don't want an escort :/ I want a genuine relationship.

ditto

Exactly. My wife doesn't like sex. I got tired of asking and always getting shot down. So I stopped asking. We enjoy each other's company, but we're basically room-mates. If a person wants a room-mate, you don't need to get married! And if i wasn't married, I could look for a GF for sex and possibly wam.

Like Jason, I'm working through this right now.

Norman

The hell with relationships, I want an escort.

Frank: sure, I understand...again, I was only suggesting alternatives....as my impression was that you seemed anxious (to say the least) to find that relationship (and that it include wam)....

...and,in my experienced opinion, being too eager or desperate for a "real" relationship, and, being young, is a recipe for frustration and/or disappointment. Having a no-strings fling or even a one-time (safe) experience with someone who does not want a "real" relationship (in the sense you mean or desire) can put things into proper perspective for you, which, in my honest opinion, is what you need (verses what you want)....you may discover that what you want ...will change.

That is all I have to say on this matter...'do what thou wilt'

Yeah but I've already been doing flings and one night stands. I don't want to anymore.

How about a sex robot? I'd take a sex robot.