"I can. What did you decide to do?"

"We'll to be honest I did make a mistake. I assumed that it was Courtney Cox who was setting these pranks up for me. So, I started pranking her and then she was pranking me in return."

"Always messy pranks?" I ask.

"Yeah, nearly always. They are the best sort - right?"

Cheers from the audience.

"So, what was your best prank on Courtney?" I ask

"Oh, that's a tough choice." Jennifer pauses "I guess when I got her at the end of her wedding scene and she is in that classic white dress. So she goes back to her named set chair, sits down which triggers this huge tank of chocolate custard above her!"

"Oh wow!" I say.

"Yeah! It landed right on her, lots down the front of her dress! Great outcome!"

The audience applaud this achievement.

"But why was all this a mistake?" I put in.

"Oh well it turns out it was Lisa who was pranking me at the beginning not Courtney! So when we found out this led to three way pranking! It got really intense for the last season! We were begged to stop so the schedule did not slip!"

"No lasting bad feeling I hope?"

"No, no" Jennifer shakes head "We were great pals and got a lot of it out of our system with an epic three food fight at the end of show party"

"Sounds great fun!" I say. "And that really got you the reputation as a practical messy joker!"

"Well, I guess so but I just think I was being reasonable." The audience applaud Jennifer's choices. Jennifer acknowledges their support with a wave.

"But it has followed you around on other projects, right?"

"Sure, but you know making movies and TV is messy anyway, best to get the retaliation in first I think." More agreement from the audience.

"Well, it certainly seems to get pretty intense round you, I mean with Marly and Me it carried on to the film premier right?"

"Yeah, that was sneaky. I turn up trying to look my best" A photo appears on the screen of Jennifer in a black dress.

"That's the one" confirms Jennifer "And, well perhaps unwisely I had a running prank exchange going with the three makeup artists and they turned up to have the last word and ambush me!"

A video of Jennifer taking questions on the red carpet starts but soon three women appear coming up behind her. It's clear the journalist is making every effort to hold Jennifer's attention as the ladies approach. This works because Jennifer is still smiling as the first woman holds out two large strawberry pudding pies either side of Jennifer's head! After a moment she sandwiches Jennifer's head between these two huge pies! The two huge pies are left stuck to Jennifer's head covering most of it. Immediately the second lady steps up to pull open the front of Jennifer's dress and empty a huge jug of custard down it! The final lady lifts up the back of Jennifer's dress to slap a large cream pie on her bottom! Jennifer is left staggering about in confusion and humiliation!

"Yeah" says Jennifer as the audience laugh "They got me good there!"

"So, was that film your messiest film project?" I ask

"No, no" Jennifer shakes her head "The Horrible Bosses movies, one and two were the worst for sure."

"And why was that?" I ask

"Well on the first movie I got into a full-on tit for tat prank cycle with Julie Bowen"

"Oh, from Modern Family!"

"Yes, and she had become a prank master on that show! And then Megan Markle got a small part in the film as well and Julie and I just messed her up at every opportunity!"

"Interesting! I hear Megan is a great taker of mess, is that true?"

"For sure there is something about her that just makes you want to get her. Julie and my favourite was to wait until she was all dressed up ready to leave for the day, grab her and push her headfirst into a full size dustbin of mess and pie her bottom for good measure! We had her in bins full of semolina pudding, baked beans and custard at various times!" Jennifer laughs at the memory.

"Wow! It sounds a very messy production"

"For sure and when I came back to do the sequel the crew had just got it into their heads to mess me as much as possible. Plus, they had me in some outfits that just made mess more likely!"

"What like this one?" I say pointing to the screen, where Jennifer is in a provocative black outfit.

"Oh Yeah. After the scene when I was wearing that they didn't even bother with a prank they just put me in a gunge tank loaded with double cream and let me have it!"

Another picture comes up of Jennifer after the gunging, she is completely covered in thick cream and someone is just pressing a blueberry pudding pie on top of her head as a finishing touch.

"Oh, I had forgotten about that pie touch" admits Jennifer as the audience applaud the photo.

"So, I guess your reputation is secure as this demon prankster now" I say.

"Yeah, can't shake it now" agrees Jennifer.

"I guess that includes your current project, The Morning Show?" I ask

"Absolutely. Doing the second season now but when we started Reese Witherspoon was sure to get her 'retaliation' in first. Within a few hours of the first day, I had sat in a huge cream cake in my favourite jeans!" Explains Jennifer.

"The classic cake sit!" I exclaim "It must be the most common prank of all."

"Yeah, I guess" considers Jennifer "I could not tell you how many I have sat in and I still fall for it! Somehow, I just don't check my chair often enough. People love to set up buckets of mess to empty over my head as well, that's real common for me"

"It's that famous hairstyle." I suggest "People just want to see it messed." Murmurs of approval from the crowd.

"Yeah, I guess," agrees Jennifer "What about you, do you get buckets of mess over you often?"

"To be honest the thing that happens to me most is getting pies in the face. For some reason people love to see me get a pie" Cheers of agreement from the audience "Especially these people!" I say with a laugh indicating the crowd.

"You know I can sort of see that." Adds Jennifer looking at me carefully.

I look at Jennifer carefully! I seem to reach a decision.

"Well," I say "This has been a dream come true for me! I'd like to thank you so very much Jennifer" I stand up to indicate we are at the end. There is polite applause from the audience but the disappointment can be sensed. Jennifer stands up as well and waves to the crowd!

"Well, this has been fun!" Says Jennifer smiling broadly.

"I'm glad you enjoyed it" I say "Oh! I almost forgot!"

"What?"

"When we did the PR saying you were coming on the show, we got some messages for you from some of your friends!"

"Oh, how sweet! Who sent them?"

"Well, we had one from Courtney Cox actually!" I say excitedly

"Oh, that's nice" says Jennifer.

"Yes, she asked we give you something from her." I add

"Oh what?" Asks Jennifer.

"This!" I say bending down behind the hidden side of the sofa and standing back up with a large, clear plastic jug of sour cream!

There is an instant cheer from the audience who are sure Jennifer is about to get this! Jennifer looks outraged!

"Courtney predicted pretty much exactly what you would wear Jennifer so we are able to pass on her message precisely!" I add. Jennifer puts one hand on her hip and starts to wag her finger at me. I ignore her pull open the front of her black leather trousers and start to pour the thick cream into them! The crowd go wild and Jennifer looks at them in shock but I just keep pouring more mess into her trousers! Pretty soon the front area of Jennifer's trousers is full of the thick cream and start to overflow, thick streams of the cream running down the outside of her black trousers. The jug is now empty!

Jennifer stares down at her bulging messy trousers.

"Well, an excellent message from Courtney Cox!" I gleefully say.

"Wonderful." Adds Jennifer in a flat tone. "I will be sure to send her back one as soon as I can."

"So glad you liked it!" I add with a laugh "Because we had another 'goodwill' message! This one from Megan Markle!"

"Oh no" starts Jennifer.

I am passed a full-sized clear plastic bucket. This bucket is full of baked beans.

"Megan said to say how well she remembers your time together on Horrible Bosses!"

"Hold on" says Jennifer.

But it's no good I lift up the bucket and start to empty it over Jennifer's head. The beans spread out and over Jennifer's famous hair very quickly. A wave of beans covers her face as well. Once the bucket is three quarters empty, I put it right over her head. The audience applaud long and hard after this.

Jennifer stands for a moment as beans slide down her, before taking the bucket off her head. In the meantime, I have been passed a large bowl containing a couple of litres of creme fraiche. Jennifer wipes her eyes free of beans and flicks them away contemptuously.

"And I am pleased to say we have a message from Resse Witherspoon your current partner as well!" I say with a smile.

"Why am I not surprised!" Replies Jennifer.

There is no doubt Jennifer is about to get the Creme Fraiche it's just a question of how. I don't make anyone wait long. Jennifer's plunging blouse allows me to stuff handfuls of the white oily mess into her bra cups easily and I pack the black bra until the white gloop is oozing back out! This if anything raises the level of cheering from the audience.

Jennifer wipes a few more beans off her face as she stares down at her ruined bra. "Well, I will have to thank Resse as well" she mutters.

"I guess so!" I say with a laugh unable to believe this life time dream is coming true so well.

"Well, it's been sort of fun Ira" says Jennifer but I need to go clean up!"

"Sure, sure!" I say wiping my hands clean on a napkin "Thanks for coming on the show!"

There is applause but with a hint of disappointment. Jennifer walks off, dripping the odd few beans as she goes. I sit down in my armchair clearly overjoyed at how well this has gone.

"Well folks, this has been really special for me! I hope you enjoyed it as well" I cross my legs and smooth out my beige sweater dress and fiddle with my hair.

The audience do cheer but what I don't realise is that they are cheering the fact that Jennifer has come back on stage behind me pushing a trolly loaded with food! I wave at the audience soaking up what I believe is their appreciation. Jennifer has in the meantime picked up a pair of very large raspberry pudding flans and is approaching me from behind. The audience keep cheering to maintain my attention, by now I am grinning like an idiot. Jennifer is behind me now with the two huge flans held out each side of my head! I still have no idea of any problem at all and wave again at the cheering audience.

Jennifer slaps the flans together with my head in between! There is a wet 'Splat' noise as my smiling head disappears in the pie sandwich. Bright red raspberry pudding sprays down my front and shoulders. Jennifer gives the flans a rub and push to make sure all my head is covered in pudding and the flans are firmly stuck in place before turning to the trolly and grabbing two huge jugs of slightly lumpy custard.

The audience is cheering! This is what they expect of the show.

Jennifer comes round the front of my chair; I am still sitting rooted in shock.

"Ira, I took the precaution of securing some food in case you misbehaved" explains Jennifer. There is no noticeable reaction from me, it's possible I can't hear with the flans still stuck to my head, I am just turning my head from side to side as if trying to understand what has happened.

"Since you have ruined my favourite leather trousers, I think we would have some fun with your leather boots!" Adds Jennifer, I am beginning to wipe my mouth and eyes.

Jennifer picks up my right foot and pulls off my knee-high black leather boot, then she takes off the left. Jennifer stands both boots in plain view on the coffee table. Jennifer gets the first of the jugs of custard and to rising applause fills my right boot with it. Of course, next she fills the other boot with the second jug. Then Jennifer tops off the custard with a can of whipped cream.

Jennifer carefully takes the right boot, stands it on the ground by me and lifts up my right foot and then slowly pushes it down into my boot! Custard oozes out and runs down the boots as my foot is pushed back into place, my jaw sags open in shock. Of course, Jennifer does the same with the second boot! All this is met with cheers and laughter from the crowd.

Jennifer moves on to taking a large jug of green slime! Jennifer uses her other hand to push my mini dress up my thighs so that my simple white thong can be seen by all. Jennifer seems to hesitate and asks the audience;

"Should I?"

A resounding "Yes!!" Is the reply.

"Ok!" Shouts Jennifer and pours the slime all over my hips and down each of my bare thighs!

Jennifer tosses the empty jug away and turns to address the audience

"That was fun!" Cries Jennifer to the crowd, arms outfield in victory.

The crowd enthusiastically applauds! Jennifer soaks it up but behind her I have eased up out of my seat! The crowd work to keep Jennifer's attention as I position a large cream cake on the coffee table and pick up a large clear bowl of chopped, skinned tomatoes!

Jennifer is still waving at the crowd when she feels the back of her leather trousers being pulled open and then the pulped tomatoes being poured into them! Jennifer lets out a wail of distress which is cut short in shock as I pull her back to sit squarely in the cake on the low table! Jennifer's shocked silence gives way to a low moan as everyone else enjoys watching the cake ooze out from under her behind. I don't let the moment pass and pick up a large cream flan and push it firmly in Jennifer's face!

I then take a jug of bright yellow smooth custard and pull open the back of Jennifer's blouse and carefully pour all the custard into it!

Jennifer sits in the cake with the pie in her face for a moment as the audience cheer before slowly dragging the flan down off her face and clearing her eyes. Slowly Jennifer gets up, the back of her trousers are plastered.

"Ok" splutters Jennifer "You know I was hoping not to have to do this to you Ira but you leave me no choice."

I look a little concerned, the audience goes quiet in anticipation.

"Ok guys" says Jennifer "we are doing the Megan"

And with that, two girls I recognise as Jennifer hairstylist and makeup artist, come onto stage but I look at the full-size dustbin they are pushing out on some wheels which is full of black cherry yogurt!

I realise what the Megan reference is and start to say "no" but it's no good the three of them grab me and take me over to the dustbin.

"Give us a countdown from three!" Cries Jennifer to the audience.

The crowd are definitely up for this "Three. Two. One.!" They shout and I am pushed headfirst into the dustbin! I go right in up to my waist! Yoghurt spills out as I plunge deeper! In a second Jennifer has my dress flipped up so that she and her helpers can pie my bottom with some 6 assorted pudding pies making a nice multi coloured mess of my bare buttocks and thong!

This is very popular with the crowd! Only then does Jennifer pull me back out of the yoghurt! My mini dress is plastered to my body and I am gasping for breath! Everyone is having a good laugh at me. Jennifer waits for me to clear my eyes of cherry yoghurt and then pushes a cream pie in my face. Jennifer and her helpers plaster my head in cream pis and give me a cream pie bra. I stand stunned at the thoroughness of this humiliation!

"Well," says Jennifer "I guess we are finished! That was great fun especially that last bit so we will all say good bye!"

All I can manage is a small, submissive wave as the lights go down during loud, prolonged applause.