I'll spare all the details, but a special friend and I have a bet on an NFL game next weekend. Winner gets to inflict the Splosh ABC's on the loser.

We're looking for suggestions for each letter. Loose ties are fine (ie C could be chocolate, a brand of whatever, cherry (or cherry pie), cold (ice cream) or crotch (something inside pants or to "play" with). Ideas only for one gender are fine too.

Give us your best ideas!

Sorry, no pictures for either of us, but I'll let you know how it goes!

This has been done before. No links, for reasons that should hopefully be obvious from context - if not, do your own research on some of the more unusual terms - but the song went as follows:

"A is for Apple Sauce
and B is for Baked Beans;
C is for Creamy Muck Muck
Dripping down your jeans.
D for Dirty Norris
and E for even more;
F for Fruity Mango Chutney
All over the floor.
G is for Gravy,
H for hooped spaghetti;
I is for ice cream
thrown on like confetti!
J is for jelly,
K is for ketchup,
L is for lamb sauce (!!?) -
Are you going to retch up?
M is for Mushy Peas,
N is for Nose Blows,
O for Orange crisps -
Muck up to your elbows!
P is for mashed potatoes,
Q for eggy Quiche;
R is for Rice Pudding,
do you Capiche?
S is for Spam,
T for tinned tomatoes;
U is the Usual,
but starting to decompose.
V for vegetable soup,
W is white lumpy stuff,
X is for Xtra usual,
scream if you've had enough!
Y is for yoghurt,
Z for zabaglioni (?),
we hope our little lesson
hasn't caused you acri-mony!"