So basically, I need help and advice. I might have feelings that are more than friendly for a female friend. The hang up, is that she's gay. I meant she wasn't, as she had a boy friend in high school, but that doesn't change anything right. Basically, any advice on how to stop thinking about them, or should I attempt to come clean with my feelings, (as they are at the moment I mean) so she understands I'm more weird than normal? I'll be talking to my psychologist about it, I'm just a ball of anxiety at the moment about this and other things.
1. You can't stop thinking about them. You can't 'control' thoughts but you can control how much they affect you. Normally by living in the thoughts and understanding/disputing rather than trying to push them away. Talk to your therapist and "negative automatic thoughts"
2. Explore all the options about talking to her or not, possible outcomes and different ways of telling her. Does she need to know? is it for your benefit only? are you prepared to lose a friendship over it? etc. Again with the therapist as it's a good place to bounce ideas around.
There is no way of knowing the future so you could do what you think is right and get it totally wrong, that is life (but at least you were in control of the decision).
Silver_sea said: 1. You can't stop thinking about them. You can't 'control' thoughts but you can control how much they affect you. Normally by living in the thoughts and understanding/disputing rather than trying to push them away. Talk to your therapist and "negative automatic thoughts"
2. Explore all the options about talking to her or not, possible outcomes and different ways of telling her. Does she need to know? is it for your benefit only? are you prepared to lose a friendship over it? etc. Again with the therapist as it's a good place to bounce ideas around.
There is no way of knowing the future so you could do what you think is right and get it totally wrong, that is life (but at least you were in control of the decision).
Thank you silver sea. She knows me well enough that she has introduced me as her 'awkward friend" so she at least knows me well enough. It will be a difficult few week until my psychologist.
matty87 said: So basically, I need help and advice. I might have feelings that are more than friendly for a female friend. The hang up, is that she's gay. I meant she wasn't, as she had a boy friend in high school, but that doesn't change anything right. Basically, any advice on how to stop thinking about them, or should I attempt to come clean with my feelings, (as they are at the moment I mean) so she understands I'm more weird than normal? I'll be talking to my psychologist about it, I'm just a ball of anxiety at the moment about this and other things.
One thing that helps me is journaling my feeling and thoughts out somewhere than going back to them at a later time.
What other things are you anxious about ?
Paint with play and surrender
9/24/24, 8:41pm: This post won't bump the thread to the top.
Love you, too
