My buddy gets the idea of Pie a la Mode--nothing big, he just wants to test it out. So, I head over in just my cutoffs over a neon orange cotton thong and an old pair of Pumas.

As soon as I get there, he gets started. He opens my shorts and packs as much French Vanilla ice cream into my cutoffs as he can. They are tight to begin with, so pulling them up and zipping them takes a minute. He then takes a funnel, sticks it down the back of my shorts and fills it with soft serve ice cream. The funnel goes down the front of my shorts as they are filled next, with melted ice cream.

It is now all running down my thighs. They are completely covered. My Pumas are filled.

He pulls out a five gallon bucket and pours the chocolate sauce over me. Finally a selection of seven different pies are thrown at me--direct hit to my face, one on top of my head, a pie sandwich, crotch, butt and chest.

Then I am sprayed down with whipped cream.

Man--he forgot the cherry. What do you think--do it again?