Introduction
It was Day 1 of the inaugural Life's a Beach Festival, a 4-day music festival being held for the first time on the beach in Daytona Beach, Florida.

Comedy Central was a presenting sponsor of the festival, and their smash hit show, the revival of the 90s variety show What Would You Do, was located in Daytona Beach and was taping a special episode where winners of games played on the show would take home 4-Day VIP passes to L-A-B Fest, giving them upgraded accommodations and access to the most exclusive areas at the festival.

The first game of the day was a simple one: two teams of four went head-to-head, one person from each team was assigned to a day of the festival, and had to name more artists performing that day than their opponent. The loser had to pick one of eight squares from a "Mystery Board", which contained numerous punishments and, ultimately, a GAME OVER square, which would award the VIP passes to the other team, and send every member of the team that drew the square to one of the show's infamous pie devices, inspired by the messy contraptions of the original.

Four girls and four guys took part in this game. The girls were rising seniors at the University of Minnesota and who had just driven in from Minneapolis earlier that morning; the guys were rising seniors at Arizona State University, and they too had just driven in from Tempe earlier that day.

Halfway through the up-to-eight round game, the girls were clearly worse off. All four of them got a pie smashed in her face as a penalty for losing a round.
Lizzie is a member of the school dance team and had the slim, ballerina-type body to prove it. She started the game in a white cropped 3/4-sleeve shirt and matching white leggings, but got caked in the butt, caked in the face, and had her clothes cut off to reveal a white and blue striped bikini top and matching thong underneath.
Maddie was the Barbie of the group, blonde hair, blue eyes, and a petite build. She wore a pink bralette underneath a magenta cropped hoodie that was stained with pie mess. She also sported pink yoga pants on her long legs, and had pink nails to match it all.
Nicole is somewhere between a blonde and a redhead; 5'5" with a runner's build and with nothing but a sky blue sports bra that was slowly getting stickier and stickier from pie remnants, and tie-dyed white and sky blue short bike shorts on. She won her round, making her the cleanest of the four.
Bea had put in the most work into her look today, but you couldn't tell by looking at her now. She was ready to rock out in a black v-neck tank top, black mini-skirt and fishnet stockings, all of which covered up an American flag tube top bikini, but all that was left of her was the bikini; like Lizzie, her black outfit was cut to shreds as a penalty for losing a previous round.

Meanwhile, the guys had largely gotten off scot-free, with the exception of one burly bro.
Ricky is Mexican-American, 5'10" and toned with tan skin and close cropped dark brown hair. He sported a Toon Squad jersey (from Space Jam) and paired it with maroon and gold basketball shorts with the Arizona State trident logo on them.
Charlie wore a pink and black Inter Miami jersey with Lionel Messi's name and #10 on the back, with light blue denim jeans. He looked every bit a soccer player, shorter and more slender with a well-built lower half.
Ben was a striking 6'4" Swedish international student with a blonde ponytail and pecs for days beneath his unbuttoned baseball-style button-down shirt. Like Jason, Ben's thighs were basically popping out of his jorts. Partially by his proximity to these guys, he transformed from a mild-mannered freshman international student to one of the hardest partiers on campus.
Jason is jacked, Italian-American and had a strong Staten Island accent. He came in looking like he just finished a workout, wearing a skintight blue tank top with the Superman logo on it and slim-fit running shorts on his thick thighs. He had cemented his bro-y look by gelling his hair that day. But all of that was wiped away when the REVERSE THE ENTIRE BOARD square came up and he had to get all the punishments all the girls faced: getting his clothes cut off, getting pied repeatedly, and getting caked. Now, he was nothing but a blubbering mess, pie filling up and down his body, with blast zones covering his face, chest, and, curiously, his crotch, where splatters of white whipped cream and red cherry pie filling smothered his formerly bright lime green speedo.

The game was only half over, which was good, because the studio was only half destroyed.


Round 5
"Welcome back to What Would You Do, everybody!", Marc Summers said. He was the longtime emcee of this show, dating back to its original run, and now that it aired later in the evening and catered to an exclusively adult audience, Marc and his writing team could finally lean into all the risque ideas they'd picked up after all these years.

"Well, it was a wild and crazy first half of our game. But the GAME OVER square hasn't come up yet, so we have to keep going!

"What we're gonna do now is go back to the beginning. I'm gonna call up the same groups who played earlier, and once again, you're going to have to give me the names of artists playing on your assigned day of the festival, rapid fire.

"You cannot use any artists in the first round. And once again, the loser is the person who can't come up with a correct response, or who gives me someone performing on a different day of the festival. Got it?"

Having barely navigated the first half of this game, all eight contestants visibly dreaded continuing to play this war of attrition. But with passes valued at over $1,000 at stake, they nodded their assent, and Round 5 commenced.

"Alright," Marc said, "Let's go back to the beginning with Ricky and Lizzie!"

Both contestants stepped forward. Back in Round 1, Ricky won, and Lizzie drew a cake in the face as punishment. She ended up taking two cakes, including one from festival performer Steve Aoki, thanks to some complaining on her part, and her messed up face and hair showed the effects of that penalty. Now she stood here in nothing but her bikini top and thong, feeling more exposed than she'd ever been in her entire life.

"Once again, no duplicates. New artists only! I want artists performing on Thursday, okay?

Ricky and Lizzie both nod.

"Lizzie, you're up first. On your mark! Get set! Go!"

Her: "Sofi Tukker."
Him: "Timmy Trumpet."
Her: "Uhh I don't know any more!"
Marc: "Are you sure? 3 seconds!"
Her: "Fuck, fuck, fuck"

BUZZ.

"The Beaches!"

"Oh no, Lizzie!" Marc said, this time with fake sorrow in his voice. "The Beaches is right, but you didn't get it in time!

"So I'm sorry, but I'm gonna need a number!"

The cameras cut to a seriously frowning Lizzie, whose hand is covering her mouth as she examines the board. The odds of drawing the GAME OVER square have increased dramatically, now just 1 in 4. I would do anything to not lose this game, she bargains.

"7."

It's a claim that immediately gets tested, as Robin walks slowly and dramatically over to the board to peel away square number 7 to reveal

PIE SPANKING! With four skulls!

"Oh my gosh," Marc exclaims. "Robin, I'm gonna need more pies! Every one of these girls is getting a pie right to her butt!

The girls shout nooo almost in unison. They vividly remember how viciously the guys pied them in the face in a previous round, and now they get a free shot at a more intimate part of their bodies?

Robin gives each man another cream pie. Somehow, these are piled even higher with pie filling and whipped cream than any of the others.

"Ladies," Marc says, "If you would please turn around and receive your punishment."

Some of the girls plead for mercy. There must be another way! But alas, the only way to maintain their fading hopes of winning the VIP passes is to get their asses pied on national television. After their complaints fall on deaf ears, the girls finally relent.

Maddie is the most covered up with her tight pink yoga pants still on. Nicole was relatively modest in her skintight bike shorts. Bea had her American flag bikini bottom covering her. But Lizzie was as exposed as could be: after getting her outfit cut off her body earlier in the game, all that remained was some ass floss. The pie would be especially cold, especially devastating, to the cute blonde dancer.

"Gentlemen, on the count of three, do your worst!"

The audience gives the signal.

ONE! TWO! THREE!

The boys attack the girls all at once, smashing their cream pies hard into their asses. Terror-filled screams ensue as the girls universally feel the strangest, gooeyest, most invasive experience of their entire lives. Clothes, bodies, and egos are all instantly destroyed on impact, with hits so hard that side splatter from some girls end up splattering the girls to their left and right.

The cameras slow down in real time to capture cream flying in all directions, the girls' butt cheeks rippling out from the sheer force of the hits. Bare-assed Lizzie takes it especially hard, stumbling forward a few steps before regaining her balance.

Ben took the liberty of rubbing his pie up Bea's ass and onto her lower back, before taking a couple of fingers to the back of her bikini, pulling it open, and letting pie slop slide right in between her cheeks. Upon feeling this, Bea yelps, whips around, and shoves Ben backwards. He smirks at her and holds up both hands as a halfhearted peace offering.

It's a scene of utter devastation to the four girls' dump trucks. But with no GAME OVER card picked yet, the game must go on.

"Round 6, I'm gonna need Bea, and I'm gonna need Charlie!

Bea steps forward uncomfortably, visibly put off by the pie still shifting around in her bikini bottom, the whipped cream melting and leaving trails of white down her legs.

Marc instructs them to name artists performing Friday,

Bea was so overwhelmed from the totality of this: her clothes being cut off, Ben opening her bikini to dump pie into it, how instantly her makeup work in the car this morning was ruined, that she lost track of time. She snaps back to attention to hear Marc saying

"Three seconds, Bea!"

"Kendrick Lamar!" she shouts, the first thing that came to mind.

BUZZ.

"I'm sorry, Bea!" Marc says. "But one of the rules was, you couldn't repeat someone you said in the last round, and you did! So once again, the boys win another round, and you win another box from the Mystery Board!"

Bea covers her face with her hands. Her heart races, knowing that the chances of pulling the GAME OVER card and taking the automatic loss at this point was 1 in 3. But would that be better than pulling whatever punishment awaited under the other two cards? Was any of this still worth it?

"Three."

"Okay, then," Marc says. "Box number 3. Robin, would you please?"

A drumroll kicks in over the studio speakers as Robin dramatically walks toward the board. She takes hold of the panel and peels it away to reveal

HUMAN ICE CREAM SUNDAE! With two skulls!

"LET'S GOOOOOO!" Charlie yells, knowing he'll get to ruin the already half-naked Bea and another girl of his choice.

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