UMD Stories


Mike's Amazing Life--Part 10
Story by Pie Punkx
Posted 2/7/19     809 views
(This was originally written in November 2016, and I've lost the ending of it, so I've re-written it probably a little differently to the original)

To celebrate the arrival of part 10 of this incredibly slow-moving series, I thought I'd change the scene a little bit.

If you've read all of these, thank you, but you'll have heard a lot of my voice and I'm only really the supporting cast. It's my super hot, punky, WAM-loving babe that you're really interested in. She knows I share stories about what we get up to on here, and loves the thought of other guys (and maybe even the odd girl) getting kicks off it all like I do.

She wanted to have a go at getting your pulses racing with a story about a recent messing-up I subjected her to. So, without further ado, let me hand you over to the one and only Lynzey Harris-Blake!



Hey guys! Yeah, so let me explain that I'm not the best writer around! Mike will do his best to tidy this one up. What I am pretty good at though is getting splattered with pies and gunge, and I want to explain for myself why it feels so good.

Since it's fresh in my mind, let's talk about last Saturday. Mike had told me he was gonna mess me up, but hadn't told me any more than that. I'd asked him what he wanted me to wear, and he'd said "surprise me".

When I'm getting WAMmed up, I like to keep my outfits interesting. Mike loves stripping me down to my underwear and pieing the living crap out of me, but we do a bit of role play sometimes too. You might have read about the teacher-pupil fun we had in chapters 2 and 3, or when he gave me a good spontaneous pieing and gunging in my England kit in chapter 6. I really loved that!

So, Saturday afternoon came, and Mike and I were on the couch. He was in a sexy T-shirt and jeans, while I was wearing my Ramones T-shirt, a short tartan skirt and a pair of long black boots. I climbed onto his lap and started kissing him, feeling his cock harden as I rubbed my lap against it.

"Time for your messy session," he said deviously between kisses.

"OK" I said sweetly and innocently, jumping off him. "How long do you need to get it all ready?"

"Give me half an hour!" he replied.

I went into the bedroom and stripped totally naked, then I put on my outfit. Mike's never mentioned this but I'm not a bad gymnast. I'm pretty energetic and flexible, which has its uses in the bedroom of course

I happen to own a tight fitting, light blue gymnast's leotard. It's a lot like a swimming costume really, it leaves my arms and legs bare but hugs my tits, hips and arse nice and tight. I guess being a gymnast should mean tying back my hair, which is long and pink at the moment, but I'd rather get it nice and messy. I wasn't in the Olympics, I was treating my boyfriend to another opportunity to cover me in dessert and other gunge.

I looked at myself in the mirror and smiled naughtily. I'm no narcissist, I think there are tons of girls prettier than me (Mike's edit - There aren't!) but I can look at myself and feel sexy. I felt good, and was well up for a Saturday splattering!

"I'm ready, are you?" I purred, opening the door slightly.

"Ten minutes" Mike replied.

Damn it! I was ready to go! Ah well, maybe I'll just get in character and do a few cartwheels and handstands. Yeah, that'll pass the time.

Mike finally finished setting up his stuff and called me out. I slinked out of the room, walking daintily on my tiptoes.

"Ah, the gymnast!" he said. "Hot stuff!"

I looked over at what he had set up. There were pies everywhere, buckets of stuff that were going to end up all over me, and a blue, inflatable thing with a chair in it.

"Oh wow, a paddling pool!" I squealed, jumping up and down with excitement. Then, I don't know why - maybe it was the leotard bringing it out of me - I ran over to the paddling pool and did a handstand in it. One of my better ones too, I kept my arms and legs straight, pointed my toes and landed perfectly on the balls of my feet.

Mike wolf-whistled and applauded. "Do that again!" he said.

I brushed my hair away from my eyes. "Sure thing, stud!" I said, and threw my hands down in the centre of the pool again. As I extended my legs, I felt Mike's arm wrap around my ankles, and straight away knew what he was up to. He just wanted to tickle my feet, the big weirdo!

"Oh no, ahahaha, not the tickling, heeheehee!" I kicked and shrieked. I'm very ticklish but that only makes me enjoy it all the more. As Mike's fingers tortured the soles of both my bare feet, I couldn't help but flex my toes back, then Mike went for that bit just under my second and third toes, where I'm REALLY ticklish. I thrashed, coughed and spluttered, giggling with a mixture of panic and glee. Honestly, how many girls would put up with this, being dangled upside-down and having their feet tickled? Well, I love it! If you're into WAM, you've got to be into looking and feeling ridiculous, and enjoying being 'tortured' as long as it's playful.

Mike let go of my ankles and I flipped back onto my feet.

"Right, let's get you gunged!" he said.

I smiled sweetly, then I took my place on the chair. I was pleased to see that the first thing Mike had in his hands was a bucket of water. Nice and cold I hoped, as that little upside-down tickling session had given me a bit of a rush of blood to the head!

Mike took out a big sopping wet sponge and threw it hard. I shut my eyes and took it in the face, feeling the water splash across my cheeks and into my hair. It was refreshingly cool, not freezing cold. Then of course, the full bucket went over my head, soaking me from head to toe.

I like getting drenched before I get messy. It's like Mike's saying "this is just to give you a taster of what's to come, but it's gonna get much messier!" I find it dead sexy!

Next up, I saw Mike grab a couple of bags of flour. Flour is a fuckin nightmare to wash out, it clings to your skin and hair like glue, but you don't care about that during the session. Mounds of flour got dumped over my hair and rubbed over my face, it clung like paste over my leotard and legs, leaving me a white, powdery mess.

"You look like a ghost gymnast now!" Mike laughed.

I caught my reflection in the mirror behind him. I did look completely ridiculous, as I gave the mirror a cheesy grin. I might as well have a good laugh at my reflection now, I though, as by the time Mike's finished with me I bet I won't be able to see my own hands in front of my pie-splattered face.

"Right, it's pie time!" Mike boomed, sure enough, lifting up two big messy custard pies.

I dropped my shoulders. "What have I done to deserve this treatment?" I pretended to whine.

"Been my girlfriend!" he snapped, as he dumped the first pie on my head. I felt the custard trickle down my face as he continued "you need to understand that such a decision comes with mandatory obligations."

"Such as?" I prompted.

He tugged at the neck of my leotard and managed to cram the whole pie down there. I gave a squealed gasp, I wasn't expected that! I was expecting that one in my face, but hey, custard covered tits is fun too, especially when he let the elastic snap back and all that filling and crust started oozing down my cleavage. Ooh yeah!

So already I was looking and feeling a right mess, soaked and covered in flour, pie on my head, custard down my top, when I saw Mike pick up another pie, this time a gloopy chocolate one.

"What a lovely looking pie, did you make it yourself?" I asked.

"I did!" He beamed. "It's got everything. Chocolate frosting, cream, real melted chocolate. In fact, there's just one thing that still needs to go into it."

"Oh really? What's that?" I prompted, stupidly.

"Your FACE!" he announced, drawing back his arm and slamming the chocolate pie powerfully into my face. I giggled as he ground it in. It was thick, rich, sticky and absolutely delicious. I licked my lips, savouring my punishment and enjoying the taste.

"Mmmm...chocolate!" I said. "Can I have another one?"

"Greedy girl!" he said. "But OK!" He tossed an identical chocolate cream pie into my face, obscuring my vision completely and leaving me with a hefty facefull of that gooey chocolate loveliness.

"I love it!" I said, licking my lips slowly and sexily as I looked him in the eye. "What else you got for me?’

Well, there's banana," he said, stuffing a fruity yellow pastry in my face. "Or you could try a bit of lime," he went on, as he slowly rubbed a green, slimy pie all over my face. You know, I don't know whether I prefer getting smashed with pies, or having them slowly ground around my face. The latter actually feels really loving, like its some sort of messy caress.

Mike was obviously starting to feel the love too. He knelt down next to me, lifted my chin up a little and kissed me on the lips. These are the bits Mike doesn't mention in his stories, probably cos he's a boy and he gets embarrassed and just wants to write about pies and sex, but he's really sweet. He's always giving me kisses and hugs, checking I'm alright and telling me how awesome and pretty I am while he's messing me up. I kissed him back, and we enjoyed a long snog, made all the more sexy because I knew that as soon as it finished, I was gonna get that big custard pie he had in his hand smashed right into my face!

We finally stopped kissing and SPLAT! There was the custard facial I was expecting, delivered so hard it rocked my chair back an forced my feet into the air.

A chocolate cream pie followed, and in fact Mike was about to launch into one of his trademark pie barrages. Custard, cream, chocolate, lime, blackcurrant and more all ploughed into my face like a machine gun. All I could to between each pie hit was puff my cheeks and try to take in some air. Then he poured something thick, wet and yellow on top of my head.

"Ohhhh, not the cold custard!" I wailed, looking up as the contents of the bucket dropped generously into my face. I ALWAYS look up when Mike gunges me, none of this bowing my head and letting it bounce off me. Mike's into his facial coverage, so I always make sure the bulk of the gunk is firmly in my face.

I looked forward, panting and laughing. I was so horny, and Mike could tell. He slipped his hand up the bottom of my leotard and started tickling the outside of my vagina. I moaned, closed my eyes and tilted my head back as he slipped a couple of fingers up there and started rubbing my clit. God it felt good!

"Oh yeah Mike, you're gonna make me... mmpphhh!"

Ha, I should've seen that coming. Another banana cream pie in the face while he was fingering me. The messier I was getting, the hornier I felt and I couldn't hold on much longer. My body shook and I screeched ecstatically. Mike quickly pulled his fingers out and, while I was still orgasming, showered me with a bucket of melted chocolate, absolutely blitzing me from head to toe in the runny, gooey, delicious brown gloop.

"Oh my god!" I panted, struggling for breath "I fuckin love it when you mess me up!"

I looked down into the paddling pool and stamped my bare feet in the chocolate, custard and general pie remnants that had gathered there, letting the messy concoction ooze between my toes. I think maybe seeing me do that gave Mike an idea, as he took up a place behind my seat and put two hands on the back of the chair.

"Up for a dunking?" he offered.

"Oh, you wouldn't? Aaargh!" I replied, as he tipped the chair and sent me lunging forward. I landed in the browny yellow pool of slop, face first of course! Just for added slapstick, I pretended to try and stand up a few times but kept 'slipping' back into my mixture of puddings, dunking my face in each time. Mike thought it was hilarious, but I could tell he was also massively turned on by this spectacle of me in tight-fitting sportswear, flailing about in a paddling pool full of dessert.

"How you feeling, Lynz?" He laughed.

"Well, I think I've had enough sweet stuff!" I said, wiping my eyes slowly and kneeling. "I fancy something savoury now like, oh let me think, a big juicy sausage!"

"Well, I've got a footlong for you!" he cracked, unzipping his jeans.

'Footlong' is an exaggeration, but he does have a massive dick, and I love to get my lips around it. I watched eagerly as he lowered his jeans to his ankles and that big, hard, throbbing trouser snake tumbled out of his boxers.

"You treated me to a great gunging, so now it's time for your reward!" I purred. "Bring that thing over here, big boy!"

Yeah, these lines are a bit corny, but they seem sexy at the time! Mike shuffled over to me and planted his great big cock in front of my face. I gently held his balls in my hand and started tickling them, which always gets him going. Then I looked him in the eye and said:

"I've been tickled, pied, gunged and dunked, and now I'm gonna suck that cock for you!"

I love talking dirty to him! I started licking up his shaft, curling my tongue as I reached his helmet, being slow, steady and deliberate in every flick of my tongue. Mike gasped and his knees trembled a little, but he's good at keeping the wolf from the door and I knew I'd get a few minutes of cock-licking and sucking out of him. I started to lean forward and take the full thing down my throat, then I leant back.

"Any pies left?" I asked.

"Just one, coconut cream," Mike replied.

"C'mon, let me have it!" I panted

WHUMP! A wonderfully gooey strawberry pie hit me square in the face. My head was coated in so many layers of gloop by now, it was in my ears, nose, seeping into my mouth and clogging up my hair. I leant back upon impact, moaned and thrust myself forward again to carry on sucking Mike's dick. Mmmm, I can remember how good it felt with that whopping willy in my gob, throbbing and pulsing, as the sweet smell and taste of multiple pies overwhelmed my senses.

Mike was overwhelmed too, and I could tell from his pace of breathing and the throbbing of his cock that he was about to blow. I took his dick out of my mouth and accepted yet another facial, this time a generous helping of hot jizz, before laughing and licking the mix of dessert and cum off my lips.

Afterwards, we had a lovely shower together and then he gave me a long, relaxing massage as I lay naked on the bed. See, he does have that side to him, he just doesn't write about it!

I'm a WAMmer, there's no doubt about it. It just goes to show that we have things inside us waiting to be awakened, as I would never have even thought about taking pies in my face or getting custard down my knickers for kicks if I hadn't met Mike. But I did, and I love it! I totally get why he loves it too. We're a couple who share a fetish, and that's something truly special.

And writing this has really got me going too. In fact, let’s get that rice pudding out of the cupboard...
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