I think it's the smartphone era. There's always been a problem with flakiness and anxiety and toxic people in the community. It's a lot worse now tho.
Once I finally moved to a place where there were "lots" of wammers and got my own place where I could host, I thought things would be better. It's worse. I've never had anyone healthy in my life long term that gets it with what wam is for me.
I was better off as a 20-something with game picking up vanilla twinks. They're more down to try and honestly emotionally safer than most of these folks.
In two decades I had probably 50 vanilla partners for mud, slime, and pies. God I was the best. Nearly all of them loved it.
With wammers I think I've been with only four, and half are terrible people.
wouldn't have guessed that wammers would be super narcissistic when it's a self-deprecating fetish but I was wrong (and ofc some wammers are doms).
Plenty of these folks would rather jerk and live lonely miserable lives rather than take a chance on human connection with people who understand them.
Wam becomes a fantasyland rather than what I thought we all wanted it to be growing up, a part of our regular lives. Most wammers I've talked with have little to no wam irl.
Dude got really mad at me for years for saying some of this stuff cause he's in a relationship with a non-WAMmer and I was like thinking, he's the 1%. Most wammers I've known are chronically single (me too) and those that aren't have wamless relationships. I felt like I have a lot of experience communicating with others.
The queen bees on here are as toxic as Instagram influencers. Their lives are a reflection that doesn't match the consumer's reality. And they get to pick and choose who they deign worthy of sessions so it's the gay dating/hookup market on steroids. A small minority hold all the cards, most get nothing.
We grow up sexually unsatisfied, and decide that's the template for our lives. Very few of us plan on being emotionally and sexually integrated to a 'normal' degree.
People are picky. I'm not sure that it's anything else .Apps like Grindr and similar ones have made it easy for people to cherry pick. Whether it's done deliberately or unconsciously, it's still done. We all have our types and many people will wait for that type to come along. Human beings for the most part tend to be shallow. Grass is always greener on the other side etc. Look at this site as a prime example of we who cherry pick. People say i'm into this this this and this and it's like trying to get a row of numbers in bingo. "no this person only has two of the things i'm into"
Yes, people are picky - some want younger guys, some want older guys, some will do this and not that, etc. I took a look at your profile, and it might help if you posted more information about your messy interests, ability to travel, hosting/not hosting, etc. Adding some tags (e.g., peanut butter, mud, cosplay, whatever) might also help draw some interest your way. Looks like you're a newbie here - we all were, once - so check out some of the other Florida profiles to get a better idea of how to market yourself. Good luck and welcome to UMD!
PieSlimeluvr said: People are picky. I'm not sure that it's anything else .Apps like Grindr and similar ones have made it easy for people to cherry pick. Whether it's done deliberately or unconsciously, it's still done. We all have our types and many people will wait for that type to come along. Human beings for the most part tend to be shallow. Grass is always greener on the other side etc. Look at this site as a prime example of we who cherry pick. People say i'm into this this this and this and it's like trying to get a row of numbers in bingo. "no this person only has two of the things i'm into"
Yeah I think the older guys don't get it. Hooliham and I were on here as teenagers when it seemed like everyone was 50 and those guys were always down.
People now look for reasons to not be compatible. That is true with Grindr to but the difference is most people have options cause of the size. Here most of us have almost no options and people choose perfection (no wam) over any wam
I've got muddy with a few women. Absolutely none of them are people I've met from contact via the wam scene but instead, just (otherwise) ordinary people I've met elsewhere who've shown enough interest to actually try it out. In my communications (or attempts at communication) with people on this page and similar others, generally (and with notable exceptions) the conversations haven't lasted long. Read into that what you will.
Yeah I think the older guys don't get it. Hooliham and I were on here as teenagers when it seemed like everyone was 50 and those guys were always down.
People now look for reasons to not be compatible. That is true with Grindr to but the difference is most people have options cause of the size. Here most of us have almost no options and people choose perfection (no wam) over any wam
Older as in age or older as in time being on this site? To be honest i didn't realise Hooliham was a teenager when on here. I discovered his stuff via youtube. He still looks like a twink which in my case i use as a compliment.