So I had a quiet weekend and plenty of time so I figured it was a good time to get messy. I haven't for a couple of years due to a variety of life stuff and was very much looking forward to the opportunity.

Previous times its been great, but this time round, it was just a bit meh. The anticipation was good but the actual getting messy did nothing for me. Nothing sexually and I didn't even really enjoy just playing around in it and, trust me, the cleanup is even less fun when it did nothing for you.

Maybe it needs to just remain in my head and keep it as a fantasy. Has anyone else found that the idea of getting messy is infinitely better than actually doing it? is this just a phase? it feels like a lot of effort to try again.

Have you ever considered that you might be more into watching other people get messy than getting messy yourself?

As far as I know I have zero desire to do anything messy-related myself. Watching it? Whole nother story.

All of my past partners weren't into wam at all. And that's perfectly fine. We all experience it differently, and feeling no arousal doing wam is fine. I tried to get my partner to play with me but they just wanted to watch, and I was totally fine with it.

Cleanup always sucks no matter what substance you use. For me, it's a small price to pay for my overwhelming urge to cover myself in all kinds of messes. For others, it drastically takes away from the motivation, enjoyment, and overall experience as a whole. Believe me, I've had more than a few sessions that were NOT worth the aftermath. Sometimes, less is more too. You don't need to do a full on session to reach a satisfying level of pleasure. A small drizzle of chocolate here, a bit of whip cream there, and you can sometimes get away with just wiping it off with some wet wipes or a 5 minute shower.

One of my favorite substances is batter, but the setup and disposal is arduous. Opening each individual package, and bag, cutting them open, putting them into the garbage/recycle bin, mixing everything, having enough buckets and bowls. By the time thats all done you are exhausted. And heaven forbid you don't have your cleaning supplies ready, or camera set up. It's really a level of dedication some viewer's just don't see. And when others want to try similar scenes for themselves, it can feel like quite a hurdle.

All in all, do your own thing, and what makes you happy.

Since prior efforts did have good results, it could just have been this time that was off... especially if you built up a boatload of extra anticipation and expectations leading up to it.

When that happens in any situation, I find that I feel let down even if whatever it was went down without a single problem.

You could try a bunch of smaller, low key, low effort, (low cleanup!) messes. If those build up an interest, you're back in business! And if not, you've figured out something about you without a big expenditure of time, money, or cleaning.

There's another recent discussion about fantasy vs reality ("Does anyone find the fantasy better than the reality?") in the Messy Minds group that might give you more insights.

Just go on-line and join an 'A.I.' platform. Create whatever your 'fantasy' is, enjoy.....

Yeah, self-wamming for me has always been bad. It's like being into impact play and hitting yourself. For me WAM is only good when it's done with another person. Even my fantasies revolve around other people (with perfect results and no clean-up).

That's the best thing about using shaving cream. Cleaning up is as simple as rinsing off in the shower. The texture and visual effect is nice with a great "pie in the face" sensation!

Loads of things can change a mood for messy fun. Good and bad. It's a case of thinking about it and working out what works for you. For me it's the feel, build up, dressing up, smell and of course, end result.

A big part of WAM for me is the loss of control, so simply getting a bunch of messy stuff and covering myself isn't usually worth it. The best experiences I've had have always been with someone else, or failing that from the result of losing games on here.

Actually even the simple act of posting pics and videos here makes things more exciting, as I guess I have a bit of an exhibitionist streak.

I get how you feel. Early on while exploring my interest in WAM, I was more into getting messy solo. WAM content was much harder to find then and it was way more exciting when I did come across it.

I don't really self-WAM much anymore and when I do, it's usually minor and kind of 'meh' feeling after. Feels more like scratching an itch that I get a couple times a year. I still enjoy looking at messy content and how exciting that is to me kind of fluctuates in waves.

Though the handful of times I've done something messy with partners in more recent years still gives me that rush and excitement that I had in the beginning.

I do miss that thrill I used to feel when I started getting messy. I remember when just dipping a finger into whatever gunk I was about to pour over myself would get me really excited.

I guess anything can lose its shine when it becomes routine, but I still love getting messy in the right circumstances.

I've long had a fantasy of being gunged, pied or whatever completely out of the blue when I'm going about my day. This actually happened once, in a small way.

I'd told an old friend (who I sadly don't see any more) about that exact fantasy, and some time later she snuck up behind me at her place and squirted a load of squirty cream over my head. That sort of thing doesn't seem to happen to me these days.

I was gonna say this also. Without a partner it's just ok. With a partner it's mind blowing

In my experience, the two things are so connected that I can't really focus on one without the other.

WAM as a fantasy leads me to the UMD, which leads me to photos and videos, which ultimately leads to arousal and an overwhelming desire to get messy. Sometimes that results in a great session, sometimes it ends in regret.

If you can separate the two, then maybe fantasy is all you need? It's that intense desire to turn fantasy into reality that makes me want to get messy, regardless of how potentially disappointing the outcome might be.

I've been with the same partner for years and our sessions can be hit or miss. Kind of like sex itself, you have to be in the right mood, with the means to do it. Sometimes I'll be finishing at the end of a session and thinking about a previous session that was particularly good!

There are undoubtedly some things that should be left as fantasies. They can be (are?) perfect every time, whereas reality sometimes isn't

Absolutely. I am so lucky (as is he) that he is not only my soul mate, but we get to share our passion together

Have you tried recording sessions to view back later? Even for your own pleasure? Sometimes when I'm solo, I don't like it in the moment- maybe it's cold or I wasn't in the right mindset. But watching it back is then thrilling or sharing it with others then does it for me. And recording knowing someone is going to be watching then definitely turns me on. Don't get discouraged. I love getting messy but not every time is going to be up to expectations.

Yes totally feel the same way used to give me nurse but very horny at the same time. Now the hours of prep and hours of clean up are a real turn off.
I'm going to get into mud now as I haven't much before.
I like the idea of roll around then was in nearby creek then it's all done

I hear you. The cleanup is a pain and is definitely a factor that made me not want to do it for a few years!

I've gone through phases. Years without doing it (mainly because I was ashamed by it) and now more recently I've started doing it more often as my partner is open to it It has meant that solo sessions aren't as grim (and yes, I shouldn't need someone else's approval for me to feel ok about it, although I must admit that it has helped!)

What really helped for me is having a proper setup to reduce the cleanup. The most useful tip I read is to have a session somewhere outside of where you get cleaned (i.e. shower or bath). Previously I would have been using the shower. It was a horrendous feeling just sitting there in the mess (after I've finished of course). Having to awkwardly cleanup while I'm messy and the shower is messy. Ultimately increasing the amount of time it took for me to get into the shower and be clean!

I started a post a while ago in relation to cleaning and setup and was given some great tips. A useful tip I've come across is to use baking trays underneath the chair / stool to collect the mess! That way you don't need a swimming pool, unless you're using a lot of gunge

https://umd.net/forums/how-to-avoid-making-a-mess

Best of luck