I've been on this forum for 14 years, mainly reading posts, looking at videos and generally appreciating the great work that the models and producers post on here. However the last 12 months have been very difficult mentally and physically for me. Living alone during lockdown has brought many challenges and the opportunity to mess anyone else up has been impossible. But today for the first time in weeks I have a smile on my face and I thought I'd share the reason on here to try and give just a small piece back to this community.

In 'normal' times I am lucky. Very lucky. One of my former work colleagues who went on to become one of my best friends is a wammer. (I may write another blog about how we both found out about this). She loves getting messy but her husband does not enjoy this kink at all. But as we have all known each other for many years he is happy for his wife to meet me and get messy. Sometimes he comes along and other times it's just the 2 of us. When we have messy fun she always gets very messy. Sometimes she will get her own back on me when I least expect it. This suits us both as I prefer getting other people messy to getting messy myself. Our one rule is that it's always clothed Wam. One of the biggest attractions for us both is getting our clothes messy and this was the main reason that her husband is happy with our arrangement. We both have specific types of clothing that we like to use and this is part of the fun too. Anyway, it has been impossible for us to meet up since April last year due to Covid.

Since October I have struggled both physically and mentally. Work and my personal life has been stressful and all the day to day activities I usually take part in to help me unwind have just not been possible as they are all cancelled. Without going into too much detail My IBS got worse, my sleep was terrible and getting out of bed each day was becoming more of a challenge.

However today I have a smile on my face and I am looking forward to the week ahead. Yesterday for the first time in 6 months I got messy. I hadn't planned to do this but when I got out of bed I decided to tidy the food cupboard in the kitchen. I found some things that were out of date and this gave me an idea. Rather than just throw them out or pour them down the drain I decided to pour them over me. I also had some gunge that I had ordered to use with my friend last year so I decided to mix that up as well. I ended up with several buckets of gunge and 6 tins of assorted food. Custard, soup, beans, rice pudding, eggs and flour. I put on a pair of jeans and a shirt and spent some time in the bath slowly getting messy. I started off with a dice and each number on the dice meant one of the items of food was going over me but if I threw the same number twice then that meant gunge. The food was quickly used up and I then spent some time gunging every part of my clothes inside and out. Once the gunge was all used up I then stripped off and used a jug to pour the mess in the bath all over me again. By this point I was very aroused and there was only one thing left to do...

Rubbing the gunge into my skin felt incredibly relaxing and I swear I could feel my stress levels reducing while this was happening. I slept better last night that I have done for months and today I am still walking around with a smile on my face. It's a small step forward but I am going to try and get messy again later this month. It's not quite as good as messing someone else up but it'll do for now until life starts to return to normal. And if it has a positive effect on my health then why the hell not!