This post began with a forum question about if anyone has had any bad wam experiences before. While I've had many, many good times, it can't be all rainbows and orgasms all the time! I shared a couple of my experiences and the reactions people had to them were great. People told me my stories were hilarious. So I'm adding them here.

The question was: Have any of you ever had any bad wam experiences?


Oh, where to begin? I have a friend who is quite wealthy and is bad at listening to me. I have told him time and time again what type of things are a turn on for me and which I would not enjoy. I think at this point, he does it just to irritate me. One time he got a five gallon bucket of cheap ice cream and let it melt before he dumped it on me. It was cold and watery and didn't do a very impressive mess. And it was so cold that the neighbors definitely heard my late night horror movie scream through the wall!

I hate marshmallow fluff and Nutella, so of course a couple of times he used both of these horrid sticky things on me. He proceeded to get over-excited and rubbed my hair so hard that I felt a patch of my bangs rip out of my skull. It did not feel good at all! Rrrrip! Why does this always happen with these two substances and why do people enjoy using them? I don't get it!

Another time I remember him cutting my face with the pie tin when he gave me a pie. Still yet another time I remember telling him to just be easy on me, because I had a giant boil like pimple on my butt. He got into the kiddie pool with me and unexpectedly pulled me towards him. There was no resistance because I was covered in mess and all slippery, so it caused the boil on my butt to scrape over some folded layers of plastic on the floor of the pool and OUCH!!!!

And I do not enjoy Marie Callendar pies at all. They are too large, too expensive, they take too long to defrost and I hate pie crusts in the mix. They make it uncomfortable for me to masturbate. For some reason, I am super upset every time I see a stack of those in the freezer at his house. "Oh, joy. Some icy frozen crap with huge pastry crusts!" One time he covered me with sprinkles at the end of a gunge session, too which I replied "Oh! Why did you do that??? Now I don't even wanna touch myself!"

And then there are the yeast infections from masturbating and getting sugar up your pussy. The worst offender for me in this department is the quarry. I've gotten 3 yeast infections from pond mud. I don't think it can be much worse than a yeast infection. Unsurprisingly, this hasn't stopped me from playing in the mud!

So, about those yeast infections... There are lots of microflora, microorganisms and bacteria that live in ponds and almost certainly do not belong up your pussy. The same can be said for sugar and flour. Given a dark, warm and moist place to grow, these bacteria can multiply quicker than it takes to throw a pie! Also I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that at least 50 percent of the girls on this site might not know about this because lots of them do not even have a fetish. There seems to be a recent proliferation of non-wam infiltrators making videos where they rub stuff around on their titties, throw sprinkles on it and sell it as a fetish video to make money. I'm personally tired of seeing these type of videos ; they get in the way when I'm looking for the actual filth I came here for...but that's a whole other forum topic, I suppose.

One time, this gorgeous redheaded sailor and I met online and arranged a session at my house. He brought some stuff to use and I already had lots of stuff at my house. I got a little carried away and started grabbing all kinds of things out of my kitchen. I picked up a clear bag from the food bank that I thought was cake batter, but turned out to be pancake batter. I asked him if we should use it. He smirked at me and said "You can if you want, but that's all you!" He didn't elaborate. We made a huge mess of each other and while we were showering off, I found it harder than normal to wash the crap out of my hair. After I got out of the shower, he was kind enough to point out that I had big crusty white chunks of flour embedded throughout my hair. This must be what he was talking about! I gave up after 3 shampoos and just covered my hair with a bandana for a week. Good thing all my friends know about my crazy wam stuff and didn't bat an eye when I told them about my misadventure! I think I even had my boyfriend at the time helping me pull these little chunks of of my hair! Crazy!

One time, a guy got a five gallon bucket of peanut butter and slowly covered me with it until I was completely engulfed in peanut butter. This turned me on very much and I couldn't stop masturbating. I remember my eyes were totally glued shut and out of nowhere he kept trying to kiss me. This freaked me out a little because of how heavy the peanut butter was on me and I kept getting claustrophobic every time he put his mouth on me. I told him to get my dildo for me and I masturbated for an extended period of time. About maybe halfway through my orgasms, the peanut butter started to chafe me and rub me raw on my pussy. Never one to quit before cumming, I soldiered through, but ended up super sore for a week. Water and thick oil, well, I guess... They don't mix well.

experience. In 2014 Me and my friend Tom decided to get a couple of bottles of vodka and lay in the sun in my yard all day. I got my mud made and got into a bikini. I had him sit in the side yard, out of view of me, but able and willing to ward off anybody who might wander into my front yard or warn me. Tom is a nihilist, Tom is an alcoholic. Tom got drunk and hallucinated that I took the bottles of vodka even though at this point I was covered in goop and yelling around the side of the house "I didn't take your fucking vodka!" He got angry and wandered off. And then I hear my queer African American neighbor (think of like a gay Urkel) who pops over every other day asking for smokes or whatever "Yoo-hoo? Aaammmy!" and he sort of walked around the corner into the tiny backyard area at the same time and he got way more than he paid for when he came around the corner! He saw me completely covered head to toe in thick grey clay, spread eagle with a toy inside me. I screamed and he said "OH MY GOD! I am so sorry, AMY. I'm so sorry!" And then he ran. It was a unique experience. Later he reassured me that he has seen lots of stuff before, being from the gay community. But he still said he had never seen anything like that before.

Another time a friend of mine tried to deflate and roll up an inflatable pool that he had not cleaned out. He wrapped it up in a tarp and put it in his trash can. He lives in the woods at the end of a private drive, sharing the area with four other houses. He is exceedingly mortified of his kink and so, he must have just about died when he awoke to find that raccoons had taken the orange tarp full of leftover cake batter and food stuffs and spread it wide open in the middle of his driveway in front of his home! I laughed but he probably cried! Good stuff! Hahaha