Prologue

The Producer looked out of his penthouse window onto Canary Wharf. In front of him was a blank sheet of paper except for one sentence "Ratings successor to Slime"Ongoing was the deeply distracting sound of a student protest over tuition fees. A sudden flash of inspiration struck him down like a thunderbolt. If these students are willing to burn cars for a cheap University place what else would they be willing to do?

Dressing Room 1

Harrie wondered into her dressing room waved in by a young production staffer, biting her lip in apprehension. She had signed up for "The Tuition Free Show!"; like many others, because of the soaring price of education on top of renting in London. The show promised to clear the existing debts of the winner and fund any course you happen to be starting next year for however long you study. As someone about to start a Master's course next year on top of a degree she was feeling the pinch.
Glancing in the mirror she adjusted her neat scarlet bob and applied some chapstick to her lips. She was slightly on the tall side with alabaster skin and a model's bone structure. Harrie was one of those girls who glided rather than walked; her mystique and quiet confidence made her extremely popular.
"Oh hello there." came a posh but pleasant voice from the other side of the room. "I'm Lisa". Lisa was a tanned brunette about an inch shorter than Harrie, she wore a blue t-shirt with "University of Reading" written on it. Harrie noticed her cut-off denim shorts which showed off her enviably shapely legs.
"Hi I'm Harrie" a nervous hug followed. Over the next 15 minutes the girls bonded over their fear and excitement. Lisa was a Pharmacy student who was approaching her second year, like many she found the cost of living away from home scary and the prospect of writing off any debt whatsoever appealed to her. Dominating conversation however was the consent form they had just signed and how the dressing room contained the biggest power shower they had ever seen!

Dressing Room 2

Inside the next room were two very contrasting contestants. Eleonara was performing stretches on one side of the room. She was tall, tanned, toned and blonde. A Cambridge Law student, she rowed for her college in the lightweight division and had been educated at various European private schools. Her world came crashing down a year ago when her dear father was imprisoned for his role in a multi-million Euro bank fraud; she ceased contact with most of her family in disgust.
Leeds-born Maia was chattering away to Eleonara. She was preparing to be a fine art student next year and as a keen fan of "Slime", she jumped at the chance to take part.
"For me it's all like a kind of performance art isn't it?" Maia twirled one of her dyed dirty blond curls. "Getting messy is like a big fuck you to society isn't it?"
Eleonara nodded along. This game was all about the winning for her. She knew there were twelve starting contestants and at the end of each round the two poorest performers would go head to head in some kind of challenge. She intended not to be in the final two. Even her Adidas clothing was geared for performance including 3/4 length running tights and fitted running top, which clung exquisitely to her to-die-for body.
Maia on the other hand teamed a white I Heart New York t-shirt with leopard print tights. She was plumper than Eleonara and cute rather than stunning.

The Entrance

The girls all lined up backstage. There were a mix of ages and accents and definitely interpretations of sporty, comfortable clothing. Harrie had gone for a grey jumpsuit (pictured) with a swimsuit underneath; like many girls she had lightweight plimsolls on her feet. Eleonara and Lisa had trainers.
As the red curtain was raised the girls walked out across the metal gangway to the blaring tune of Offspring's "Why don't you get a job?", as well as strobing, heavy lights . Maia smirked at the wit of the music. Rather than forming a traditional studio audience the crowd stood up around the gangway, similar to a rock gig. This made Maia feel a little more at home. The girls waved amid the hoots, cheers and wolf-whistles from the crowd, which was strictly 50/50 split between males and females-but the males made most of the noise. There was a small stage in the middle of the crowd and a much larger complex behind some Perspex glass:
"That must be where the games take place." murmured Lisa to Harrie. The host was named Gez Gavin and was a small ferret-like man in a shiny suit.
"Here are twelve student girls in search of more handouts!! " he roared obnoxiously. "I've already picked out which one I'd give more than just a handout to! But let's meet them, so we can further appreciate [pausing for emphasis] their brains and personalities!" There were cheers from the male audience for that last line. The girls introduced their courses and Universities to cheers and boos from the majority student studio audience whenever certain unis were mentioned.
"Now time for the first game"

The Strawberry Jam Puzzle

"Good luck" muttered Harrie to Lisa as they both gingerly stepped into the perspex boxes. Lisa smiled back nervously. Eleonara looked straight ahead saying nothing. A computerised voice relayed the instructions.
"To get out of the box you must assemble the puzzle. You then must run across our assault course, over the balance beam and finally run across the quickslime." Maia looked down at the individual pieces of the puzzle, it appeared to be a picture of strawberry jam, which didn't seem to provide much clue to it's solution.
"The pieces will be released when you hear the klaxon sound." There was a moment of anticipation as the cameras focused in on each boothand then
BEEP
The pieces of the puzzle fell from their slot. Lisa and Harrie were on camera grabbing in panic at the pieces then chucking them down on the perspex screen in front of them..Eleonara's face was a mask of concentration as she put the corner pieces at the edge of her screen.
The camera focussed on the face of some small blonde girl as a great hissing sound emanated from all twelve booths. Water was gushing in at the bottom of the tank, stinging against the girls ankles.
Lisa panicked, dropping some of the pieces onto the bottom of the tank and struggling to retrieve them. Eleonara and three other girls had already finished by the time it the water level rose to the middle of their calves, their doors shooting open. Eleonara sprinted flat out towards the climbing net, which was clammy and slimy to the touch.
Another five girls were now out of the tanks, luckily as the water had reached around their thighs. Maia and Harrie were amongst these and hurried over to the climbing net. Not natural athletes they were at the back of the group in reaching the net and were caught by a small, bustling sprinter.
Lisa was left in the tank with the frigid water at waist level, she was frantically re-arranging shapes, in the same predicament was a smaller blonde girl with a cute oval face. Eleonara, on the other hand, was upon the pit of orange substance known as quickslime. Running full pelt through it, she came to a halt halfway across. It had a disgustingly strong sucking action, like no other substance on earth. As the girls fought to get through it, it congealed around their calves, holding them in their position.
Lisa and Sara, the small thin blonde, had now splashed out of the tanks and were neck and neck across the net. If they were to avoid the Head to Head they needed to catch Harrie and Maia ahead of them.
Eleonara had crossed the line when Harrie and Maia attempted the quickslime. Harrie's heart was pounding as she stepped out into the orange gloop and quickly realised her lightweight plimsolls were a bad choice: they were almost immediately sucked off her feet. Lisa and Sara were nearly on her..
Harrie, remembering her experience of moving through the Glastonbury mud, soldiered on in her bare feet, shortening her stride length to cover the ground speedily. She finally staggered over the line leaving Lisa and Sara squelching through the slime behind to face each other in the head to head.

The Head to Head Angel vs Devil

The atmosphere within Harrie and Lisa's dressing room was incredibly tense. Lisa was provided with a costume to wear for her head to head. Describing it as a costume would be being extremely kind. It was a small, red string bikini; but had attached to the back a large red devil's tail. Showered and with her hair in a ponytail: Lisa looked petrified. She was not a natural exhibitionist but there was no doubt she had a great body. As she stood in front of her even Harrie could appreciate the firm breasts, toned stomach and absolute peach of an arse. Bravely she walked out of her dressing room with Harrie hugging an insincere "Good luck".
As her bare feet padded the cold metal gantry she felt embarrassed at the appreciative roar of the crowd. "But hey" she thought "I signed up for it so what did I expect! I'll have to just grin and bear it."
There was a large paddling pool positioned in the centre of the crowd with a large, sagging tarpaulin balloon on top of it. Sara was stood in a matching white bikini with angel wings fastened to her bikini top. She was smaller and slighter than Lisa, though looked more comfortable in her skimpy costume.
"Now, for our first elimination we are going to see these girls WRESTLE!!!" roared Gez as the audience clapped with him. Now the rules: no biting, scratching, eye gouging, punching or hair pulling. The winner will be the girl who removes the other girl's wings or tail first. Oh and we have a surprise substance for you to wrestle in. Girls, step in."
The girls duly obliged. The tarpaulin was suddenly released and a cascade of red translucent strawberry jam coated over the girls' skin and hair, also forming a pool of jam a foot deep. The girls were now open-mouthed with shock and covered in glossy, sticky jam.
DING DING the bell rang
Sara began the match as the aggressor, crouching and springing at her opponent. She managed to get her hand around her opponent before Lisa dropped to her knees to try to protect her forked devil's tail. The girls were now both on their knees scrapping with more enthusiasm than skill. Sara was still trying to reach around Lisa but the taller girl's superior reach was keeping her away. Both girls were extremely slippery and hard to get a hand on.
Suddenly Sara launched another attack going low below Lisa's long arms..Lisa responded by rolling onto her back and wrapped her netball-toned legs around her opponentto the cheering (mostly male) of the crowd Lisa plucked Sara's angel wings off of her back.
Glossy with mess Lisa raised her arms in triumph, she was still in the running and now a firm crowd favourite. Sara walked dejectedly back down the gangway. Gez looked Lisa in the eye:
"The good news is you're through to the next round. The bad news is any clothes you lose in this show stay lostso you'll be spending the rest of the show in that gorgeous bikini. But at least we'll give you your trainers back"
Lisa held her trainers in her hand as she walked back to her dressing room to huge applause. She was red-cheeked with embarrassment but still smiling from her victory. Only eleven contestants remained

So without further ado let's meet the girls who are battling Harrie, Eleonara, Maia and Lisa in the Tuition Free Show.

Ivona Petrovi Originally from Croatia, Ivona is a cultured Philosophy student at Manchester University with an interest in Photography and language. She has a cuddly, curvaceous build,brown hair, brown eyes, pale skin and minimal make up. Her interest in this competition is mainly to free up more money to travel the world. Her outfit combines uber-punk tight red tartan trousers with dark green converse trainers and a t-shirt with a Croatian pac-man on it. She bustled through to 5th place in the first game. In the application form she lists her favourite band as the Arctic Monkeys and her favourite film as Amelie.

Danielle Tudor-Jones A student at St Hilda's College, Oxford, Danielle is the kinda girl who will still be in the college bar at 3am but still get up for a run around the quad at 7am, followed by a light 6 hours of study. She is strikingly attractive, with wide green eyes, long legs and straight black hair. She reads History at University, but is considering a career in PR where she can use her dominating personality and fierce competitive streak. Originally from Cardiff, rugby is in her veins though as a toned five foot five she is much better suited to playing hockey which she plays for the Oxford First Team. She decided upon a pair of her dark Oxford Blue hockey shorts, a Welsh rugby shirt (in Xtra Small when really she should wear an Small) and Nike astro trainers without socks. She came 2nd to Eleonara in the first game, which would hurt as anything less than 1st is not good enough for her. On her application she listed her favourite band as Pendulum and her favourite film as Die Hard.

Ali (short for Alison) McKintosh Studies Sociology at the University of Lincoln. If they gave degrees for clubbing Alison would get a first class honours, possibly even a doctorate! She is a tall (5 foot 9) naturally beautiful girl with blond hair worn loose and dazzling blue eyes. Originally from Leicester she is popular, funny and likeable. She is wearing a light yellow t-shirt which leaves some of her midriff on show, pale blue jeans (part of her TopShop staff uniform) and pink and white converse trainers (now a shade of orange from the quickslime). She placed 8th on the first game, just ahead of Maia. On her application she listed her favourite band as Primal Scream and her favourite film as Dirty Dancing.

Jessica Bianchi Is the only American on the show and a Communications student at Frostburg State University, Maryland. 5 foot 4 she has a typical athletic, cheerleaders' body with her brown hair tied back in a ponytail. Her blue halter top was cut low to her stomach, with a gap to her incredibly skimpy spandex shorts, also showing her dragonfly lower-back tattoo. Everything about her screams "Sorority Chick"! She had placed 3rd in the first game but had lost her white canvas pumps in the process and was now barefoot. On her application she listed her favourite band as Taylor Swift and her favourite film as Twilight.

Libby (short for Olivia) Greenwood an English Literature student at Nottingham University, Libby is an aspiring writer and was born in Surrey. 5 foot 4 with a petite frame, she has cropped (Emma Watson boy-cut style) auburn hair, hazel eyes and pale skin. She is wearing a blue and white check shirt dress, black leggings and had managed to keep her sneakers on in the first round. She narrowly clinched 6th on the first game after a nervous start. On her application she listed her favourite singer as KT Tunstall and her favourite film as Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.

Stephanie Walters is a Biology student at Durham University but originally from Edinburgh. Whilst all other students had positive, encouraging references from their friends even Stephanie's house-mates acknowledged she was lazy, dizzy, never washed up and drank way too much alcohol ("we still love her though"-they added). The smallest contestant (at 5 foot 1), she was chubby with fairly long brown hair and brown eyes: she is heavily made up considering what the competition entails and has recently had a sun-bed tan. She wears a long blue skirt, a Super Dry red polo shirt and had lost one of her blue shoes in the quickslime so is now barefoot. She came 7th in the first game. She lists her favourite singer as Rihanna and her favourite film as The Notebook (zzz!-Otherguy).

Hanako Mori is studying Plant Science at University of Sheffield. She had been born in Osaka but moved to Sheffield when she was 4. She is an unrepentant geek-girl and fan of Manga, playing guitar and computer gaming (though draws the line at World of Warcraft!). She wears her hair long at the back, with bangs at the side and a heavy fringe framing her cute face. Hanako is wearing a white tank top and denim shorts which stop just above her knees. Her feet are bare even from before the first round. She came 4th in the first game. She lists her favourite band as a toss up between Green Day and The Gazette and her favourite film as Pulp Fiction.

My Original Contestants

Harrie Richards Attends University College London, but is originally from Herefordshire. She is studying English Literature at University but is considering Masters level study in Arts and Events Management. Harrie is the pinnacle of the type of girl you'd describe as "pale and interesting". Her red hair is cut into a fashionable bob and her finger and toe nails are painted a light shade of blue. She wears a 3/4 length jumpsuit and is barefoot having lost her shoes in the first round. She is around 5 foot 7, with green eyes and a tendency to pull a cool and detached pout. She came 10th in the first game. She lists her favourite band as a toss up between Beirut and The Rapture and her favourite film as Lost in Translation.

Maia Kingsley A fine art student at Leeds University, Maia has a curvaceous body with glowing skin and curly blonde hair. She is around 5 foot 5 with brown eyes and is originally from Rotherham. Maia combines a white I Heart New York t-shirt with leopard print tights. She wears Reebok high-top trainers. She is a fan of the original gameshow "Slime" so getting gunged will have to be really unpleasant to faze her! She has a tendency to talk a lot and be a typical pretentious art student. On her application she listed her favourite band as Burial and her favourite film as Requiem for a Dream.

Lisa Lipscombe A Pharmacy student at Reading University, but originally from Taunton. She is a 5 foot 6 tanned brunette with a shapely, gym-toned figure. She has green eyes, a cute nervous smile and her hair is long but held back with a hairband. Her University hobbies include hockey and dinghy sailing. After her win in the first Head to Head she is wearing a red string bikini which partially displays her genuinely world class bum. On her application she listed her favourite singer as Lady Gaga and her favourite film as Anchorman..

Eleonara Trachtenburg A Law student at Emmanuel College Cambridge. She is tall, tanned, toned and blonde and a lightweight rower for her College. She is wearing 3/4 length running tights and fitted running top, which clings to her near-perfect, gym-toned body. Her hair is worn in a ponytail and she wears black trainers. She is a keen runner, avid reader and generally old-fashioned Cambridge student. On her application she listed her favourite music as the operas of Wagner and Puccini and her favourite film as Citizen Kane.