She was late for her own party.

Down the hall of her apartment, her friends were already there, drinking their drinks and munching on munchies. She was made-up, but not dressed.

"Crap. Now what?" She started flipping through her dresser drawers, looking for the green bra and panties that went with her green dress. And, of course, they were nowhere to be seen.

There was a knock at her door. She ran over and said, "Yeah, I know, I'll be out in a minute!"

Her friend, Anna, whispered loudly, "Hurry up! We're getting ready to give whatshername's boyfriend his big birthday surprise! You don't want to miss that!"

'Yeah, yeah, yeah', she thought. It was customary to give someone a huge pie in the face on their birthday. Her friend Anna was a practical joker, too, and somehow always managed to find, or make, the largest and stickiest whipped cream pies imaginable. The cream was somewhere between good whipped cream and frosting. Hell, She thought, when it came to her birthday, she'd just ask for cheesecake. But she was sure Anna would set up some whipped cream, white chocolate, gooey caramel pie.

Butterscotch. She'd ask for butterscotch.

Anyway, she was late. Late. And no green bra, no green panties. Green dress.

She looked at the dress on the bed. She sighed. "Well, what the hell. .. give the boys a thrill I guess. And some of the girls.." She climbed into her dress, one hundred and ten percent commando as they say. No bra, no undies. A good cool breeze and her nipples would get stiff and make themselves very obvious through the thin green fabric.

'Well, whatever', she thought. 'Do I have tape? No, don't be stupid, that would look dumb.' She said out loud, "Right, you send naked selfies to your ex boyfriend, and some random nipplage makes you nervous? Please.".

She got her self put together, looked at herself in the mirror (hot!), and said, "Well, maybe that cute guy from finance will show up and think this is sexy so I can finally get him alone and fuck him."

She sighed, and checked her watch. "Oh, fuckballs!". Late. Really late.

She put on her shoes ("Heels. Ugh. Why not flats? Because I'm a spaz that's why", she thought.), and dashed (as much as she could dash in four-inch heels), out of her bedroom and down the hall.

Running in heels sucks. It's even more crazy when your boobs are big enough to bounce with a good underwire - and without one they're impossible to manage. What were up until a few minutes ago two of her best assets for seduction (why do men love the jiggle? Its' silly. But if it works...) were now supremely inconvenient. "Oh, for once, why do I have to be a D-cup? Jeeeesus!"

At the end of the hallway, and at the closed door, she gathered herself, re-set her previously bouncing boobs, straightened her dress, and opened the door very quickly.

She dashed through the door and just as quickly grabbed it closed it so no one could see the crap in the hallway behind her. (Must throw out those boxes, she thought). She started to smile, and took a step, and then was forced to stop.

Something was tugging at her. She couldn't move forward. She looked down to see the bottom of her dress, about eight inches of fabric, stuck in the door between the door and frame.

"Crap!", she said. She tried the handle and pushed. Stuck. "What the hell?" She tried again. No go. The door was jammed. There was just enough fabric to jam the door tight.

"Oh, crap. Fuck! Fucking, fucking fucky fuck!" She tugged at her dress. "Erg! Oh dammit, come ON!"

Behind her, the partygoers started singing "happy birthday". She was focused on getting her dress out of the door without falling over, having the girls leap out of the dress, or ripping the bottom of the dress. The fabric was pretty thin, so what the hell?

"Ooooh.. oof!, she tugged at the part stuck in the door. No go. "Happy Birthday" was just about halfway done.

"Oh, dammit! Come on, you stupid.. green... commando.. fuck!"

She adjusted the positions of her hands to higher up the dress, about mid way. "I swear, if I come bouncing out of this thing, I'm getting a reduction!". She tugged, to no avail.

The song was almost over. She leaned against the dress, digging her heels into the carpet. The dress was taut, but was starting to slip out of the doorjamb. A quarter-inch...

"Oh, come on you, just a little more.. goddammit, you fucking door, let go!". She leaned further back, and pulled. "Come! On!"

She tugged, and suddenly flew backwards into the room.

Without her dress.

Which was stuck in the door, ripped down one seam from top to bottom.

"Oh jesus, no, I've just stripped myself!" she thought, as she fell backwards. What she said was, "WOOOOP!"

Wearing absolutely nothing but her shoes and earrings, she staggered backwards into whatshername's boyfriend, for whom they sang 'Happy Birthday'.

The next thing she knew, her world went white. As soon as she felt it, she knew.

A pie in the face. And whoever threw that thing really, really got her good. She took the pie square in her face, and whipped cream went flying over her hair, around her neck, and in a wave across her big left boob. Her big right boob was peppered a little, but her face was utterly pied.

Someone yelled, "Oh my god!".

Off balance, being held up by whatshernames boyfriend, all she could say was "Woooof..."

Anna, who loved a good prank, exclaimed, "Oh my god!" and then started laughing uncontrollably.

Which got almost everyone laughing uncontrollably.

She tottered back to her feet. "Well", she thought", "At least my tits have stopped bouncing."

But her nipples were now sticking straight out, and she was feeling that hot, tight, gorgeous feeling she usually felt when in the presence of a naked handsome man after three glasses of wine.

She opened her eyes and looked around the room at the laughing crowd. "Oh, nice". She felt her cheeks heating up. This was mortifying. She looked up at Anna, who was laughing so hard she was turning red.

She would never live this down. "So, remember that time you got pied naked? That was so funny!". Yeah, Anna, hysterical. Hrmph.

She turned. Well, if she couldn't get back to her rooms, she could at least grab a coat from the closet.

But before she got there, whatshername was standing in front of her with a pie in her hand. Before she could say anything, whatshername said, "Stop trying to seduce my boyfriend, you slut!" and smashed the pie straight into her face.

Whipped cream went flying, and this time both tits were splattered with whipped cream from the force and speed of the pie-in-the-face, and globs of whipped cream slid off of her hair and cheeks to land with splats on her chest. Through the pie, she said, "I'm not a slut!!"

This sent everyone, even whatshername, into more bouts of laughter.

Everyone in the room was laughing. She started to chuckle, herself. Shrugging, and resigning herself to the situation, she said, "Ok, well, yeah, I guess it is pretty funny!", and she started laughing as well.

She finally wiped her eyes, and licked her lips. "Hey, this tastes good."

Anna, still giggling, with tears in her eyes, walked up to her. "Oh, you. I'd swear you planned that if I didn't know better."

She said, "Thanks. Did you aim for me, really, tell me the truth."

Anna said, "NO! Really, I didn't. The timing was unbelievable. I was very surprised."

"YOU were very surprised!! Ha! Imagine me!"

"I don't have to imagine you, I can see you. All of you."

"Yeah, I need to get to the closet and get something to wear."

Anna said, "Oh, don't worry about that, I have something for you to wear."

She said, "Oh, thank god. You're such a sweethear--"

SPLAT! Anna, laughing, just plastered her with another pie, this time rubbing it all over her face and hair. Cream and pie slid all over, and in gooey waved and blobs once again landed on her chest.

Anna then shouted "get her!" Before she could protest much beyond a squeak, three people then started to smash pies in her face and all over her head. She kept getting pied in the face with the big cream pies. It felt amazing, and she was getting turned on by all of it. In the end, they'd tossed and smashed and smushed and swirled eight large, whipped-cream-loaded pies in her face. She was creamed from ear to ear and face to waist.

Anna, laughing, said, "I don't know what's more pied, your face or your tits!", and then burst into hysterical laughter.

Everyone was laughing again. She licked her lips, smiling, and started to laugh. She raised her arms and did a little dance (deliberately making her tits wiggle all over the place). "I'm pied! Laugh it up at the pie-face girl, you bastards!"

She opened her eyes. Why wipe them anymore? Just wear it. She walked over to the table and drank some water. "Who needs clothes? I'll just wear pies."

Anna, crying with laughter, took her by the hand. "Come on, sweetie, lets get you cleaned up."

The went to the stuck door, and Anna used her hips and a good punch to force the door open.

"Now why didn't I think of that?"

"Three older brothers. Now come on, hurry."

They entered the hallway, and Anna locked the hallway door. "Privacy."

Anna pushed her back to the wall. She said, "What?"

Anna grabbed both of her whipped-creamed tits and started sliding, squeezing, and caressing. "Oh my fucking god you are so hot right now. Those tits, and those nipples. And your body.. and holy hell do you look good wearing nothing but whipped cream."

"I do? I thought I looked ridiculous. But I'm so turned on, it's weird."

"Oh, you do look ridiculous. Which is why you're so fucking hot right now."

Anna pushed her body into hers, and starting kissing her passionately. Uncontrolled, hot, and uninhibited.

She said, "Anna, babe, your clothes.."

Anna said, "Too hell with my clothes", and started to undress herself.

She joined in, frantically removing Anna's bra and thong.

Anna was smooth, everywhere. She had her body pushed up against hers, and had her hands all over.

All of a sudden one hand went from a creamy, gooey sticky nipple to her clit. She moaned, and at that moment, gave in. "Oh god, this is hot."

Anna said, "You are so hot pied. I can't believe it. As soon as I accidentally pied you, I was turned on."

She said, "Pieing people turns you on?"

"Why do you think I'm such a pranker? Now shutup." Anna took her hand and lead her to the bedroom.

Anna pushed her onto the bed and got on top of her, straddling her. She took both hands and smeared pie all over her face and hair, and then down her neck and already pie-slathered hard-nippled tits. Once again, they kissed with intense passion and pure lust.

She was in heaven, on the bed. Anna knew every button to push, how to really suck a nipple, and all of a sudden how to tease her clit until she was ready to scream.

Anna stopped, and suddenly said, "Oh god I need to fuck you. Where are your toys? "

"Top drawer", she gasped.

Anna found one, "Oh hell yes. Lay back, sexy pie in the face whore, and put your hand over your head."

She did as she was told, and felt her favorite vibrator all over her clit, in and out of her vagina, and giving her a vibrating sex-toy fuck like only Anna might know how. She bent her head back and yelled, "OH my GOD!", and in moments had an orgasm that made her almost pass-out.

Anna said, "Oh yeah. Shh, stay there." She leaned back and lie down next to her, and using her fingers, gave herself her own great orgasm.

Breathing heavily, they both lie there. Anna said, "You've never done that before, have you?"

She said, "Nope."

"Would you do it again?"

"How does tomorrow at 2 sound?"

"I'll be here. Shall I bring pies?", she giggled, and then laughed. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. But it was funny! Really funny! Oh my god, I was crying. You should have seen yourself! All tits and ass and pussy and then SPLAT! PIE! " she laughed again.

She slapped Anna on the thigh. "Ok, stop. Yes, you can bring the pies."

Anna, wiping tears from her eyes, said, "Really? I was kidding, but oh my god, Ill do it. Oh, you liked it didn't you?"

"I loved it. I had no idea. I don't think it's the pies, I think it wa everything. I was naked in front of all of our friends! In front of the cute guy from finance!"

"Yeah, I saw him. Had the biggest hardon once he saw you."

"Really? He did? Oh wow."

Anna leaned over her friend and put her palm over her sticky left nipple. "Tomorrow. Pies. Be ready. Strip before I get here."