The Wetgalfan Chronicles: Chapter 24
The Stag & Doe

(Word of warning: This one is a little long but it sets up a wet and messy wedding coming up.)

Yeah, I know it's supposed to be young couples starting out who are supposed to have stag & doe parties, but there was some fun stuff in between and instead of raising the money for ourselves, we donated it to a charity that Lisa had become involved with. You'll understand as the story unfolds.

After we had sealed our understanding in a pool chair, we headed inside to dress because the girls would eventually be up. Lisa asked me what kind of wedding I wanted. I didn't hesitate to answer her by saying Wet.

What? she exclaimed with a cracking laugh in her voice. You want to get married under water? How about in a car wash?

No, I started to explain, I want to

Wait! I've got one more! Lisa interrupted. We bring in the fire department and they open up on all of us with the hose!

No, no, I want one of those weddings where everyone ends up in the pool at the reception, I explained, not that I didn't think she'd be willing to do any one of those had I asked. Look at this.

I proceeded to pull out my phone and play Stacey and Derald's Wedding Pool Party on You Tube.

Oh we so have to do that! Lisa said, glued to the video. When it was done, she wrapped her arms around my neck. Mmmm, that's why I love you. You always have the best ideas! she said before melting into a kiss. Imagine that; it took no coaxing at all to convince my little goofball to turn her wedding dress into swimwear!

But it's too late in the summer to organize anything like that for this year, she went on. We'll have to wait for next summer.

That's O.K, I replied. I'm not going anywhere.

Me neither.

Taking our time was fine. I had already heard from a couple of well-meaning friends that I was moving into a new relationship too quickly. But this was Lisa. I couldn't think of anybody else since seeing her again. We were supposed to be together.

We hung out with the girls in the pool that afternoon, but they left us alone again that evening so I decided to take my Lisa up on her offer to tear her clothes to shreds and ravage her. I took her shopping to replace them.

She left the next day after our shopping trip. We each put a lot of miles on our cars running back and forth to see each other. I had an excuse though since I had a house going up in McKenzie. I also found out that the tear her clothes to shreds and ravage her thing was an open-ended invitation that I often took advantage of. I was a gentleman though; I always took her clothes shopping after!

Lisa was concerned that there just wasn't any movement on the water slide property over those months. I started getting an idea and sat down with an architect friend of mine from my old job. I'll tell you more about these plans in a future chapter.

Lisa got me into taking better care of myself and running. I hadn't run since my army days so it took a while before I could keep up with her. Then as Labor Day approached, she asked if I wanted to do something fun for a good cause.

I'm always up for some fun, I replied.

Then join Connie, Lori and me for the muscular dystrophy undie run.

How could I say no to running through the college campus in my underwear on Labor Day? I wore a pair of Crazy Boxers that looked like a Kellogg's Fruit Loops box. Lisa, Connie and Lori were dressed like so:



Lisa wore a blue set, Connie's was light green and Lori's was pink. The best part of the run though was how it ended at the campus pool and we had a giant underwear pool party. We were soaked already anyway. It poured down rain the entire run.

We were getting ready to do our invitations. I was at Lisa's as I had broken ground on what would eventually be our home and I was spending a lot of time down there. In the middle of picking out invitations on line Lisa asked, Since we're going to get our wedding clothes soaked anyway, just how crazy would you consider 'too crazy' for our reception to get?

She had that same look on her face she had that morning long ago in the back of the Mercury when she wanted to go skinny dipping at Land Between the Lakes. I considered asking her to clarify, but decided to play along instead. No nudity, I replied. Well, maybe just a little.

I heard that laugh I fell in love with long ago. Every time Lisa laughed I realized again how much I missed hearing it. No, no, no! she exclaimed. I meant, what if we got a little crazy with the cake?

I thought for a second. Was I hearing this right? Did she want to have a cake fight? Lisa had turned into quite the messy queen, a MILF version of Darcie. (By this point she had read everything I had ever written and was doing to best to create live versions of some of her favorites.)

You want to have a cake fight? I asked her echoing my own thoughts.

Only if you want to, she replied.

A wet AND messy wedding! God, I loved this woman! Why not? I was paying for the whole thing anyway. Whatever you want, you little goofball, I told her.

With that decided, we figured we had better warn everyone who wouldn't be in on it exactly what to expect. We sent out our invitations with the following note inside:

"Our reception will be a swimming pool reception and everything that goes with that including a very wet bride, a very wet groom and a very wet wedding party. Everyone is invited to jump in and celebrate with us whether you bring a swimsuit or come as you are just like we will. We will be making up for lost time so irreverence will be the rule and there may be a few more surprises. Get ready to loosen up and enjoy yourself! We promise you lots of fun and lots of laughs."

I was back in McKenzie in March and we were having dinner with Brett and Connie who were going to be Best Man and Matron of Honor. We weren't going to have huge wedding parties but we at least wanted them along with Lori and Terry involved. Connie asked Lisa and me if we wanted a Stag and Doe party.

Aren't those for kids starting out where the people pay to play games that humiliate the bride and groom then give them the money to set up housekeeping? I asked.

I think we're pretty well set in that area, Lisa added. She was just beginning to come to terms with my net worth since the lottery win. For that matter, so was I. We definitely didn't need any help setting up housekeeping. Construction on the new house in McKenzie would be completed by August and I had hired a decorator and turned Lisa loose with her. My only input was, No swimming pool. I wanted a pond and my Lisa wholeheartedly concurred.

It doesn't have to be that way, Connie said. You could donate the money to charity. Think about it.

We actually didn't give it too much thought until one night in late May a few weeks before the wedding. We were going to have dinner with Connie and Brett again and they insisted on keeping it a surprise. They said we'd love it. Brett drove and I began to get suspicious when he pulled into the local health club, which also had a banquet facility, instead of a restaurant. Unbeknownst to Lisa and me, they already had a party planned with a confirmed guest list before they even asked us about it. The main hall was filled with forty or fifty friends and family and a huge banner hung over it stating Congratulations Jim and Lisa!

Please be good sports about this! Connie pleaded when we entered the hall.

Lisa and I just looked at each other and laughed. Have we ever been anything else? Lisa asked her.

This might push those boundaries, Brett replied as Connie winked at both of us.

First was dinner, which wasn't really eventful at all. However after dinner, Connie got up and spoke.

Now that dinner is over, it's time for some fun, she began. Now usually these parties are thrown for couples who are young and broke and need money to get started out. These guys, God love 'em, are neither of those!

That elicited a good laugh from the assembled people. So instead of paying to play games that humiliate the bride and groom and then let 'em keep the money, we're gonna let you play to play games that humiliate them for Lisa's favorite charity!

As the crowd clapped and whistled, Brett and Terry pulled back the room dividers that had kept all of us on the left hand side of the main ballroom and revealed two rental dunk tanks. One had a sign which said, DUNK THE BRIDE! and the other a sign proclaiming, DUNK THE GROOM! Beyond them were two plastic pool chairs with signs over them that said, PIE THE BRIDE! and PIE THE GROOM!

Connie, I said quietly snickering to myself.

Remember, we said we'd be good sports about it, Lisa teased. You ran with me in your underwear for M.D.A. You can get pied and dunked for it.

But won't those games ruin their clothes? Lori loudly asked. They're both dressed up pretty nice!

Uh, oh, Lisa whispered.

Now, be a good sport, I teased.

We've got that covered, Connie said. We don't want to ruin their clothes because they are also needed for a good cause! Lisa looked at me with a mock worried expression.

Before we get them messy, we're gonna give you all a chance to bid on their clothes so you can donate them to Goodwill!

Did I just hear that right? What now? I asked.

They're going to bid on your clothes, Connie explained, pointing to the guests. When they buy them, you have to take them off and donate them!

How much are they going to get to bid on? Lisa demanded. There was still a hint of a grin, but I think she was really starting to get nervous.

Connie shut off the mic she was holding and walked over to us. It's not that bad just down to your underwear. Play along. I promise you'll like this in the end!

Connie had always loved tormenting both of us, but she was never cruel. I had always enjoyed her kid sister antics when we were younger, never having had one of my own. If she said we'd enjoy things I believed her. Lisa did too and we nodded our heads to go ahead.

Connie alternated between us, auctioning off our outfits. We weren't dressed that nicely, despite what Lori had said. Brett had told us the place we were going was pretty casual. Connie started with our shoes, then our socks. Then she sold my golf shirt and Lisa's sleeveless button-down top. That got the guys in the party going because it left her in her bra. Up to that point, no one had spent more than twenty dollars to undress us though.

Then Connie came back to me. What do I hear for these Lee jeans this hot groom is wearing?

There was a bid for five dollars, then ten and then fifteen. Then I head a familiar voice say, I'll give you one hundred dollars for them! Kris was standing and waving five twenties. Jeff was sitting next to her, shaking his head and laughing.

Sold to my mom! Connie cried, barely able to keep from bursting out laughing.

Out of 'em! Kris demanded when she came up and handed Connie the money. She was grinning the same way she used to grin when we had our little private swim parties. Kris had always liked me. I often wondered if there was a different reality somewhere were she and I enjoyed a cougar/younger man relationship.

I couldn't help blushing a little despite how many times Kris had actually seen me in my underwear. I was wearing what I typically wore as of late, a pair of Crazy Boxers. This pair was from the Murica line and had fireworks all over them. They were very popular and got a round of applause when I exposed them. Kris took the jeans and kissed me on the cheek.

Nice undies, she whispered in my ear. You'll have to wear them for a morning swim at our house sometime. She winked and turned on her heel, depositing my jeans in the box set out for the Goodwill donations.

That just leaves Lisa's jeans! Connie said. Bidding got up to thirty dollars.

Aw! Come on! Lisa shouted. If I have to run around in my underwear all night, you can at least spend as much for my pants as you did for Jim's!

Everyone laughed. Any doubt that I had that the younger generations of the family were just as crazy as the older ones was erased when Lisa's kids, Mark and Kris, pooled their money with my kids and came up with a hundred bucks leaving Lisa in a nice matching bra set.




Yeah, we both wore nice underwear. Hey! We both originally figured we'd be showing it off to each other privately later!

Now the real fun is ready to start! Connie exclaimed after the kids dropped Lisa's jeans in the collection box. Connie and Lori took Lisa by both arms and Brett and Terry did the same with me and escorted us over to the dunk tanks. We laughed and climbed up without argument. When I promised to be a good sport, I meant it. Besides, most everyone here had seen us in our underwear for one reason or another at some point.

Who wants to try first? Lori asked. Three balls for only two dollars for M.D.A!

Oh, I am! Connie exclaimed, pulling the money from her jeans pocket. You are so wet, Jimbo!

There wasn't any denying it. Connie had been as big a tomboy as her sister growing up with all of those brothers. I was going swimming. She took the first ball and wound up and I didn't even have to watch it to know it made contact with the target and down I went. The water was cold too! I surfaced to the laughs and hoots of the assembled guests and took my place back up on the seat.

By the way, it was a good thing that I had always taken Maddy's advice and stepped up my game since that day back in 1983 and had always worn high class underwear. The Crazy Boxers with the fireworks were nice and opaque and hid my modesty much better than any pair of tighty whities ever would. I felt this somewhat submissive sensation for an instant being one of two people in a crowd stripped down and the only one at the moment who was all wet. Was this what the girls in my stories felt?

Lucky shot, Con! I shouted as soon as I took my place again.

Connie just smirked and sent me back into the water.

I fared just as badly with her third throw. I got a good laugh though when instead of coming back up, I stayed under and swam around in front of the window in the tank. Connie came over to the tank, risking a splash, and offered me a hug when I came up.

Thanks for being a good sport about this, she said, very earnestly.

Any time, 'Sis', I replied. You know we're both going to get you for this though, right?

I'd be disappointed if you didn't! she shot back.

All right! Who's next? Connie called to the assembled guests.

Lisa's brother Bobby stepped up with his money. He missed his first chance but his second put Lisa in the water in that cute yellow bra and panties set. To tell the truth, I was a little worried the yellow lace might really show her off when it got wet, but it kept the important parts hidden.

For the next half hour, Lisa and I took our dunkings we deserved. We got a lot of them as anyone who missed all three tries just ran up and punched the target. Connie would pretend to be looking the other way every time. Then my daughter Katherine stepped up. Seeing that this was McKenzie, my family and friends weren't as well represented, but her boyfriend Tim had brought her and Allison down. They must have been right behind me all the way.

Can I try to dunk them together? she asked Connie.

I think that's a great idea! Connie replied. Then to me she said, Get over in the other tank, you!

I climbed down and got up in the tank with a grinning Lisa. Katherine was never the athlete of our family, so she missed all three tries, but like everyone else, rushed the target. Lisa and I started kissing as we saw her do it so we went down into the tank that way.

They've been dunked enough! Connie declared. Time to move on to the pies and cakes!

We climbed out of the tank and were taken to the chairs under the PIE THE BRIDE and PIE THE GROOM signs.

Pies are five dollars, small cakes are ten and large cakes are fifteen, Connie explained. Who's first?

Lisa's brother Charlie pied her first and then me. It was a good thing I'd just come from being dunked in cold water over and over or getting pied might have caused a little reaction, especially when Connie and Lori made sure I got what was coming to me. Then I got a shock. Kris was in the line to pie me, but when she got to the front, she said, I spent all of my money on Jim's jeans. Can I donate my clothes to Goodwill for a big cake instead?

Hmmm! Let me think! Connie said, pretending to ponder the question. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out this was planned. I don't see why not! In fact, I think that's a great idea! We don't have that many clothes in the donation bin anyway! Hey! Everybody! If you're out of money and you still want to pie them, just donate your clothes to Goodwill!

Kris was wearing a pair of tan Capri's, a red French cut top and red canvas slip-on's and was suddenly the center of attention pealing them off. Older guys whistled and shouted and Jeff sat there shaking his head and rolling his eyes. When she was done and her clothes were in the donation box, she stood in front of me barefoot in a matched set of very proper gray bra and panties holding the quarter-sheet cake with both hands.



Sitting there covered in pie, I still caught the slightest memory of her, Lisa and Connie all wearing something very similar so many years ago during one of our private swim parties. As I said, Lisa and I had each figured out by this point that everything was planned, but we played along anyway. Was Kris's memory about this sort of thing as good as mine? Had she worn these purely for my benefit? Now, before you make comments about me noticing a woman in her mid-seventies, remember; there was something in that McKenzie water. At forty-two when I met her, she looked like a woman in her late twenties and she looked now to be only a few years older than me, Lisa, Connie or any of the rest of us kids.

Anyway, Kris stood right in front of me with the cake in her hands. The hoots and whistles from the other guests had died down. However, a well-pied Lisa shouted, Let 'im have it, Mom!

I'd watch it if I were you, Kris cautioned. You may be next!

You haven't got much left to bargain for another cake with! Lisa shot back.

Her mom wriggled her nose up at her while everyone laughed and then she returned her attention to me. Ever thought you'd ever be in this situation, Jim? she asked.

Never in a million years, Mrs. Rueter, I responded and got exactly the reaction I was hoping for.

How many times do I have to tell you? she yelled in her nagging mother voice and then shoved the cake hard into my face and wrapped the cardboard plate around both sides of my head. She smeared it well over my head and through my hair, continuing to tease: You're family! Do NOT call me. 'Mrs. Rueter'!

O.K, Kris, I replied with my entire head covered in cake. The laughter was so loud that she was probably the only one who heard.

That's better, Kris said and bent over to kiss me on the cheek. Mmmm, you taste pretty good, she teased. I know why Lisa let's you get away with this now!

Oh Dear Lord! I forgot the Rueter women never keep secrets from each other. Oh well, she knew about how I really loved seeing Lisa, (and herand Connie), all wet way back when. She may as well know about all of it.

Now to take care of Lisa, she said, looking at her daughter with a wicked grin.

Like Lisa said, Connie began, you don't have anything left to bargain for a cake with!

But you do! Brett suggested. You could pay for your mom to get another cake.

Lori began a chant, Con-NIE! Con-NIE! and it didn't take long for the whole room to join in. Connie rolled her eyes and shrugged her shoulders and began taking off her clothes to the cheers of the guests.

Lisa leaned over to me and said, What do you want to bet that everyone will be in their underwear before it's over?

I kind of figured that out myself, I replied.

Connie took her jeans, camisole tank top and even her black flats and dropped them in the Goodwill bin. She walked back over in a cute green and black matched bra and panty set that her tank top had been showing off the shoulder straps from for hours.



I really meant I thought she still had some money! Brett teased the crowd. Connie stuck her tongue out at him.

She walked over to the table to the whistles from the crowd and selected a quarter sheet cake with lots of pink roses and handed it to her mother. Kris stepped over to Lisa.

Any last words? she asked her elder daughter.

Uh, I love you mom? Lisa hammed back.

Sometimes that'll work, Kris said and added a dramatic pause before saying, but not today!

Lisa just maintained her expectant expression until her face disappeared into the cake. The guests cheered and Kris bowed to the crowd in her bra and panties. Man! That was hot to see!

Ha, ha! You got caked! Mom got you good! Connie teased her messy, laughing sister. I really wished Lisa and I had been alone. I had a growing urge for cake!

Don't gloat, Connie! Kris chided.

Connie continued to point and tease Lisa. She had her back to Brett who made a shushing gesture to the crowd, walked over to the Goodwill bin and undressed. In just a pair of blue boxer briefs, he walked over to the table and picked up a thick chocolate cream pie and handed it to a smirking Kris. Kris tapped the still jeering Connie on the shoulder and when she turned around, SPLAT! Kris shoved the pie hard into Connie's face. Connie froze facing the guests and let them laugh at the pie dripping from her face down onto her bra and her bare skin. Kris shot me a wink. Was this all planned for my benefit?

I saw Jeff get up from his seat and come down to the Goodwill bin.

And what are you planning? Kris asked with her hands comically on her Bali-panty-clad hips.

Someone is having way too much fun. I want my turn, he replied and stripped down to nothing but dark blue boxer shorts. He walked back over to the pastry selection and picked up a nicely over-stuffed banana cream pie. He took Kris by the hand and led her over to Lisa.

Sorry honey, but your mom looked like she was having so much fun, I just have to try this, he said to Lisa with a big grin on his face.

The crowd giggled and snickered in anticipation. Lisa sat up and straightened herself with dignity. Jeff cocked the pie back as if he was going to throw it at her. Instead, however, he swung it around roundhouse style and smashed it into Kris's face. Kris stood there just like any WAM model would and let him shove the pan up over her head and rub it around, grinding pie crust into her hair.

Lisa and I howled with laughter along with the guests. The attackers becoming the attacked bit was played perfectly.

Oh, so you think us getting pied is funny? Connie teased. Lori, I'm afraid you're going to have to buy us two big pies!

Everyone had forgotten that you could actually pay for the pies. Lori grabbed Terry and pulled him over to the Goodwill bin. They deposited their clothes and walked back to the pie table barefoot in their underwear as everyone else had. Terry was wearing red long-leg boxer briefs with white trim and Lori looked like she was in underwear for everyday.



That wasn't a bad thing though. I think a woman parading around in even everyday underwear is sexy and it served to prop up the illusion that this wasn't all planned ahead of time. Terry just went back to his seat, laughing and shaking his head, and Connie met Lori at the pie table. They selected two thick chocolate creams and came back over to Lisa and me.

On your feet, you two, Lori demanded. Stand close together. She was clean of course, but Connie still dripped pie from her face.

Lisa and I held hands and stood side-by-side, still dripping pie ourselves. Heck, Connie had just gotten one. Lisa and I were destroyedand I for one was loving it!

Under her breath, Connie said, Thanks again for being good sports about this.

This is fun! Lisa replied. You gonna pie us both now?

Not exactly, Connie said. When I say three, you both duck, O.K?

Got it, I replied.

Time to show them how funny Mom and me getting pied is, Lori, Connie said out loud. Connie stood to my left and Lori took up a position on the other side of Lisa to her right. O.K, ready? One! Two! Three!

Lisa and I ducked on three and Connie and Lori shoved the chocolate creams into each other's faces simultaneously. Plenty of it still splattered down on the two of us, but we were wrecked anyway. The crowd loved it. We stood up and turned and hugged each of them, getting them even more covered in pie.

Well, that's just about the whole wedding party now, Brett said.

It's not everyone! Connie replied. She, Lori and Kris all used the single finger come here gesture to Brett, Terry and Jeff respectively.

You don't have anything to left to trade for pies, Terry teased.

Jim'll cover it; won't you Jim? Connie said, twisting her head toward me and winking. I gave her the O.K. sign.

The guys stood in a line and were good sports themselves, letting the messy ladies arm themselves with banana creams and come back over to simultaneously let them have it.

Connie addressed the guests once the laughing died down: Well now, since the whole wedding party is already a mess, take your pick from all of us if you still want to come up and pie somebody. You can pay with money or donate your clothes. You may as well use your clothes since you know what's coming up later!

What's coming up later? I asked Lori who had set a chair down next to mine to become a willing pie target.

You'll find out! she would only tease.

Connie set a chair next to Lisa with Brett on the other side of her. As a large number of the guests lined up at the Goodwill bin, Connie stood back up and announced, Hey! Also, if you want to be on the receiving end, we'll be happy to hit you with the pie!

Several people took her up on that offer and still others simply got a pie, hit one of us and then got a chair and put it in the line up next to us. One of those was Lisa and Connie's younger cousin Jen. I think she was actually a second cousin or cousin once removedor however that works. She looked to be in her late twenties or early thirties. She was brunette and very pretty. I'd noticed she had dressed a lot nicer than most everyone else. She had worn a rather tight orange pull over dress. When she would walk or sit, you could just see the hint of garters holding up her black stockings.




She took off the orange pumps that matched her dress and dropped them in the clothing bin. Next, the dress came off over her head. I love my Lisa and I don't want anyone else ever, but I couldn't help getting a little stiff at the sight. Jen was wearing a lace bodice-style bra that just barely maintained control over the melons inside it and a sheer girdle with built-in garter suspenders holding up those stockings. The girdle revealed the hint of a nude thong under it.



Grinning, she picked up a lemon cream and shoved it in Lisa's face. Thanks for coming, Jen, Lisa said through the glop dripping from her.

Wouldn't miss it, she teased her cousin back. You think my dress was worth another pie? she asked, eyeing me.

Go ahead, I replied. It's on me.

She picked up a banana cream and walked back over to shove it in my face and twist it around. It certainly is, she replied with a silly giggle to how I had willingly set myself up. Then she got a chair and put it in line with the rest of us. Guys were more than willing to pony up a donation of money or their clothes to show her a few pies up close and personal.

By this time about half the guests were half dressed, (including everyone's kids). A lot of them joined the targets line up. However we still had plenty of pies left and the demand was slowing down.

I said, Everybody! It would be a shame if the rest of the pies went to waste. From here on out, they're on the house. I'll cover your donation!

Thanks, Jim! Connie exclaimed. Just for that She stood up and went over to the pie table and picked up two chocolate creams. She offered each one to Lisa and me.

Go ahead! You both want to! she baited. Lisa and I got one either side of her. I figured she would duck, but she held her ground and let Lisa and me smash our pies into each side of her head for a lovely sandwich. We stepped back and she smeared the glop around in her hair.

That was a good one! she said.

That got things moving again. I don't want to tell you how many pies were still left at that point, but there must not have been a single pudding cup or tub of Kool Whip left in or around McKenzie, TN. All told, there were about fifteen of us in our underwear happily getting pelted with pies over and over for M.D.A. That included Lisa, me, Connie, Brett, Lori, Terry, Jeff, Kris, Cousin Jen, my kids and Lisa's kids.

They brought the last two pies over to Lisa and me. We were two multicolored sticky blobs by now so we each took one, faced each other and slammed them into each other's faces. As all of the guests cheered, we blindly found the other's lips and locked into a kiss, rubbing and smearing pie over each other.

Mmmm! I love you! Lisa purred. And Mom's right! You do taste good!

So do you! I replied. Too bad we aren't alone so we could make a full meal out of each other.

Kris came up to us. I'm not sure if she heard my last comment, but I'm pretty sure if she had, it wouldn't bother her. She was the one who told us to fuck all we wanted when we were younger. Like us, she was a sticky blob and there wasn't an inch of her that wasn't covered in something sweet. Her hair was sodden and slicked down with pie. She made quite the messy MILF. She hugged both of us, sharing the glop covering her head-to-toe with us.

This was so much fun! she said to both of us and then to Lisa added, It was great that you gave Connie this idea!

I shot Lisa a glance and she shot me back an Oh shit! expression. However, Kris went on: I bet your dad is going to want to do this more now than throwing me in the pond!

She started to leave, but turned back around to us. You know? You should do this at your reception! We're all going swimming in our wedding clothes anyway! May was well totally ruin them.

She flipped her eyebrows under the mask of goop on her face and then turned to leave us for real this time. You knew Connie planned this? I asked Lisa.

She just asked if there was anything crazy you liked to do, Lisa replied. I scooped a big glob of pie from my chest and wiped it on Lisa's face where she had cleared it away. She wrinkled her nose at me, and then grinning, asked, So what do you think of Mom's idea?

A pie fight reception? I pondered.

Yeah! Just like the one they had at Darcie's friend's wedding on Halloween! Wow! She really was up on my stories!

Well, I began and then paused for dramatic effect, I do love hitting you with pies!

Yes, she said and wiped her face clear where I had smeared the pie, you do.

What do you think your family and our friends will say when we start throwing pies at each other? I teased.

They'll say, 'When's our turn to hit them?' she shot back.

I take it that you want to then.

Jim, we've got years to make up for, Lisa began very seriously. It was comical though to see her being so serious in her underwear covered in cream pie and cake. I want every day to laugh and laugh with you and never have any regrets. If you wanna tear my gown off and throw me in a tub of grape jelly in my underwear at the reception, I'll let you!

What about during the ceremony? I teased.

I'd let you, but it would cost you later! she replied.

I held her close and kissed her, oblivious to the messy, half-naked guests milling around. Then let's make an even bigger mess than we did tonight! I told her. However many pies Connie and Lori madetriple it.

Connie then called for everyone's attention again: Hey! Everybody! If you're covered in pie and you want to go to the pool party, you may as well take a couple of turns in the dunk tank and rinse off!

And the rest of you weenies who still have your clothes on, they don't allow street clothes in the pool! If you're staying for the pool party, your clothes go in the Goodwill box now!

It was indeed rare even three decades and some change later to find a place in McKenzie, Tennessee that had such requirements. It was more likely that Connie just wanted everyone in their underwear. I'd been running around in mine for over an hour. I was fine with the idea.

A few of those still dressed laughed and formed another line at the donation bin. A few others still said goodnight, mostly acquaintances who weren't that close to either of us. Those of us who had spent the last hour getting thoroughly pied took turns getting dunked. (I made sure I got to dunk Kris and Cousin Jen several times!) That wasn't sufficient to get us clean though, especially the graham cracker crust well-smeared into the ladies' hair, so they opened up the health club locker rooms for us to use the showers. Then it was out to the pool!

With the wet blankets (or would it be dry blankets in this case) gone, only the true McKenzie partiers were left. All of Connie and Brett's kids were out there. In addition to Andrew, who I mentioned in Chapter 21, there were, (ascending in age): Patty, 22, Delphia, 23, (Everyone called her Dee) and Phil, 25. The boys bucked the boxers/boxer briefs trend, both wearing Jockey briefs. Both of the girls wore lace bra and panty sets. Patty's was hot pink and Dee's was purple.




Not that I noticed, (much). They were about to become my nieces after all. Nor did I notice Lisa's daughter and Kris's namesake (much) in her blue paisley set.



Kris, the younger, had a couple of college friends there, Rowan and Lucy. As Lisa told the story, both were from bigger cities. Rowan was from the Nashville area and Lucy from Knoxville. They had both come to visit during the summer after their freshman year at Austin Pea and couldn't believe the way the family behaved (i.e. swimming in clothes or sleeping and running around the house in their underwear). However when Kris took them to visit her grandparents for a couple of days, they learned how to fit right in getting tossed in the pond and invited out for a morning bra and panties swim with Kris the elder. Both of them were a little on the thick side, but wore it really well, especially if you asked the two guys who had donated their clothes and blown a lot of cash on pies when Rowan and Lucy accompanied Kris down to get pied and now were splashing and dunking their favorite pie targets and the girls were loving it. Rowan wore a black bra and red lace boy shorts that laced up the sides and Lucy wore a blue and gray matched set with a flower pattern.




Our generation was well represented. Most of the old gang who was still in town was around. Charlene, Dewey's sister from Chapter 10, (Dewey was the deputy who drove up during our underwear swim party in the reservoir.), and another of Lisa's old friends, Janice were in the pool with their husbands. The ladies were in their proper undies. Charlene's was nude, although the water turned it darker and Janice's was white and not as opaque when soaking wet as a modest lady would have liked, but since this was a party and alcohol had been flowing earlier, she didn't act like she minded much.




We had an absolute blast! The pool had diving boards and a long water slide. Jen was a big hit doing flips off one of the boards in that girdle. It reminded me of a late-night party at Uncle Roy's water slide where we'd all start out in our clothes and end up in our underwear and often less. (There is a little foreshadow of something that is going to happen at the rehearsal dinner.) It was all I could do to keep my hands to myself with Lisa, since there were kids present. Oh, and the kids loved it! I was a little worried about how mine would fit in around here. I was used to it from years back, but we'd never really raised them to see me walking around the house in my boxer briefs. We'd been a bit more conservative than that, though now I don't know why.

It was the definition of living in the moment. It's one thing to strip out of your clothes and have a pool party in your underwear. It was quite another knowing that your wet underwear was all you had to wear home. They were quite serious about the clothes being donated. Everyone's wallets, purses, keys and phones sat on the tables in the banquet room, but the big box of donated clothes was being taken out as we were playing on the dunk tanks. Most of us had even given up our shoes! I don't think there was a single person worried about it either. Lisa and I had just gone down the slide together, (bending the rules, but it was our party). I pulled her up close to me with my hands clasped in the small of her back.

Mmmm, this is so much fun! she said. I'm so glad they didn't listen to us when we said we didn't want a 'stag and doe'.

Me too, I said, pausing to give her a kiss and then said, You know, we're going to have to go home like this.

Mmmm, hmmm, she purred. Wanna walk home?

I bet you would if I said 'Yes', I replied.

Of course, she said. I told you when we were young that Mom taught us to let the men we wanted get away with murder as long as they only wanted to get away with it with us.

It's a little far for me in bare feet, I joked.

Mmmm, she purred again and kissed me. Suit yourself.

The more I looked at her in those wet and somewhat stained lace undies, the more I wanted to get her out of them. However I behaved myself, (mostly), until the party broke up. Hey, when you get a chance to goose your lady love's pussy underwater when no one is watching, you take it. Especially when she takes advantage of every chance she gets to stroke your cock.

The party did eventually break up though. We hugged and said goodbye to everyone who was still there. We collected up wallets, keys, phones and purses from the banquet room and like a bunch of dorks we all casually strolled across the parking lot in our wet underwear like it was nothing unusual. Of course by that time of night, there was very little traffic to see us, but I bet we were a big hit on the security camera for the health club. I gallantly opened the back door of Connie's 4-door Jeep for my lady fair and followed her in. Despite warnings from the front seat, we fooled with each other all the way to Lisa's house.

Let's take a shower and wash off the pool stuff and then you can fuck me like we'll never get another chance! Lisa stated matter-of-factly.

She led me to the shower in her master bath and we got under the water. Kissing deeply, we paused only so I could pull the bra top over her head. We didn't wait to get to bed and I took her right there in the shower. We slept wrapped in each other's naked body. I fell asleep reliving the fun and wonderful surprise everyone had conspired to spring on us that night and thinking about the fun and wonderful surprise I would spring on my Lisa in a couple of weeks.