Stinking Telegram Pt 2
It was now late Sunday afternoon and I was sitting in front of my computer for perhaps the fiftieth time reviewing the door camera footage of my destruction. For the fiftieth time in a row, I felt that familiar stirring deep within watching the sexy latex skunk girl effortlessly humiliate me without ever losing that sweet irresistible smile, except when it morphed into an impish smirk. Her car was visible but the plates were not. Even if I was inclined to report this to the police I had nothing to go on except the business card she'd left me with, just a telephone number and a cartoon silhouette of a pin-up skunk girl. I turned the card over in my still black-and-white stained fingers.

I'd spent the rest of Friday afternoon struggling with the stench of the skunk spray and the realization that I was truly trapped in this ridiculous fluffy skunk suit. Mercifully the designer had thoughtfully included a fly secured by velcro and a bottom flap for more urgent relief that was also sealed by velcro and hidden by the fluffy costume's tail.

After suffering with the overwhelming smell for an hour or two, I began to focus on how to get out of this literal mess. Some quick searches online and an online grocery delivery I hoped would provide the answer. Not sure what would work best, I ordered a few solutions. An hour later, a delivery woman was at my front door with a very strange delivery of liters of lemon juice, tomato juice, hydrogen peroxide, dish soap, baking soda, vinegar, and every other folk remedy for skunk spray I could find. The delivery woman gasped and giggled at the stench and at my costume as I opened the door. "Going to a party?" She inquired brightly. "Yeah, something like that." I muttered, desperate for even this mild interaction to be over before I was subject to even more embarrassment. She didn't even try to be discreet as she held up her phone to snap photos of my ridiculous attire and waved goodbye.

I'd first tried a long, strange bath in tomato juice. Now I just smelled like a skunk who'd been drinking bloody marys all weekend. I whipped up the hydrogen peroxide, lemon juice, dish liquid and baking soda recipe and settled in for another long soak. That seemed to help more, neutralizing much of the smell. An improvement for sure. My skunk muzzle and skunk nose-stained face was still unfazed by the scrubbing however.

Next I'd carefully inspected the padlock and the zipper, the precision European keyway was likely impossible for me to pick under the best of circumstances, let alone with it positioned as it was locked to the zipper behind my neck. I could call a locksmith, but no sense having to explain my appearance to yet another stranger.

Grabbing a magnifying glass, I gently rolled the skunk costume's collar down for a closer inspection. Sure enough, between the plush black and white faux fur of the suit, flexible clear tubing was woven into the fabric, making it seemingly impossible to cut away without damaging the network of tubing containing the adhesive and risking another barrage of horrid skunk scent. A bulge at the base of my fluffy tail appeared to hold two small canisters like CO2 cartridges, no doubt my Skunk girl visitor hadn't been bluffing about the risk of trying to brute force my way to freedom.

I fired off an email to my work notifying them that I'd developed a severe breathing issue and was taking the week off, not a lie. And so I found myself on a late Sunday afternoon fantasizing again about being humiliated by this gorgeous vixen in a latex skunk costume. Against my better judgment I picked up my phone and dialed the number.
"Hello?" a sleepy voice answered.

"Hi, this is Bryce Smith, we met Friday when you brought me a delivery?" my words tumbled out stupidly. The voice on the other end burst into a giggle. "Yes! Hello Bryce, I was hoping you'd call." the familiar singsong voice purred into the receiver. "You didn't cut off the suit, did you? I suppose not, you'd probably be calling the fire department and not me if you had, I suspect."

I blushed, "The suit is fine. I know this sounds weird since you've just totally humiliated me and trapped me in this fluffy prison for who knows how long, but were you serious about what you said?" I asked boldly.

"What, about liking skunks?" she asked coolly. "Yes, I like skunks."

"In that case, would you be up for getting coffee with a man-sized skunk sometime? I've got the week off unexpectedly." I chuckled. There was a pause.

"Yes, I'd like that." she offered sweetly. "Let me confirm my schedule and get back to you."
"Thanks! I can't wait!" I gushed.
"See you soon, Little Stinker!" she giggled and hung up.

I stared at my phone the rest of the evening with no response. I was about to turn in to bed exhausted when a text came in.
"Meet tomorrow at 2:00 PM at the pin location. You'll understand if I don't quite trust you to meet in private yet. Dress is formal so wear your suit " with a skunk emoji. My heart skipped a beat. That would mean going out in public like this! I looked at the pin location. She can't be serious! The Zoo?

I'd been avoiding getting my car stinky, so I hadn't dared risking driving until now. Something about her intrigued me however, so I found myself circling the zoo parking lot around 1:30 PM hoping for a spot sparing me from another long embarrassing walk in my fluffy skunk suit. I grabbed my phone, wallet and car keys, silently cursing the suit's designer for not including pockets. The costume's attached paws were surprisingly well padded, and at any rate were far too plush and fluffy to stuff into actual shoes. I strode as confidently as I dared to the sidewalk outside the ticket booth at the gate.
I didn't have to wait long, my blonde vision had been watching my arrival, no doubt laughing hysterically at my awkward movements in the costume. She was stunning, wearing tight faded jeans and a crisp white crop-top which exposed her gorgeous hips and waist. She wrapped me in a hug, "I can't believe you actually came! I'm very glad you did though. You're so brave!" she cooed. "You look adorable in your skunk costume! You smell better too! What did you use?" she asked genuinely sounding concerned.

"Thanks! A friend picked it out for me." I chuckled. I told her about the hydrogen peroxide solution and she nodded knowingly. "That's what I use too." she said matter-of-factly. "I'm Jill, by the way. Shall we?" She turned and offered me her arm. I caught a glimpse of her lower back above her jeans, the top of a tattooed skunk tail peeked above her waist. Wow she really is into skunks, I thought.

I paid our admission and we wandered through the exhibits, talking with her was effortless, I almost forgot my humorous outfit was on as we gave our histories and hobbies.

"What happened with your ex?" She asked, concerned.

"Oh, That was Jodi. We had dated for six months and things were getting very serious. Just before our first weekend trip together to a Ren Faire I'd discovered she had been sleeping with my best friend. I was devastated, and instead of breaking it off like an adult, I planned some messy revenge with the help of the organizers of the Ren Faire. I tricked her into putting her head in the pillory, then revealed that I knew all about her cheating. She burst into tears while I smashed cream pies into her face and butt then stormed off in a huff. I told the staff let her go after an hour or so, but by then the damage was done." I trailed off.

Jill listened and nodded silently. "Well it was cruel, but it matches what Jodi told me before I took the job." Jill confessed. We came to an empty zoo exhibit, only straw and a large sign covering the glass saying "New Animals Coming Soon!" "Are you sorry for what you did?" Jill asked, her voice still unsure.

"Yes, I'm very sorry for what I did. I'd apologize to her face if I had the chance." I said honestly.
"You'll get a chance." A familiar voice responded from a nearby doorway. The door was propped open, and out stepped Jodi, a vision in a very expensive looking business suit and heels, hair in a tight bun. My heart leapt again.

"Jodi I'm so sorry! I shouldn't have been so cruel!" I offered. "I deserve this." I admitted, gesturing to my ridiculous skunk outfit.

"Yes, you do." Jodi grinned. "And more. This way!" Jodi tugged the collar of my costume towards the open zoo exhibit door. Inside, were several tables laden with thick pies. I spotted several seltzer bottles like Jill's on another. In the center, was a familiar looking pillory. "If you're really sorry Bryce, you'll put your own head in that pillory." Jodi hissed. I solemnly obeyed. Jodi giddily lowered the top section over my neck and hands, locking me into its ancient wooden restraints.
Jodi's heels clicked around in front, bending over to look me in the eyes. "I was always going to dump you. As soon as I started talks to sell my company, I knew you weren't quite rich husband material. Your friend Scott however, he has a law degree. I wouldn't be caught dead at a gallery opening or ballet performance with you. Also he looks great in a suit. You were a lot of fun, but I promise you, this skunk costume is the most expensive suit you'll ever wear." Jodi's words stung. With that, she approached a table, selected a pie, and smashed it roughly into my face, grinding it into my features before depositing the pie tin on top of my skunk costume's hood.

"Did Jill explain about the costume?" Jodi asked. I nodded. "Then you'll be curious to see how it works. It's a marvel of engineering, really. Probably too complicated for you to really appreciate. I'll have to show you." she grinned evilly. She lifted a pair of scissors up, disappeared behind me, and snipped a quarter-sized hole in the costume's plush bottom. An evil hiss sounded, and I felt the costume shudder as the wetness of the adhesive spread across my skin. A cloud of greenish yellow mist began seeping through the fabric, coating my body in a wretched stench of skunk musk. It wasn't just ten times worse as Jill had warned, it was a hundred times worse! My eyes flooded with tears from the stench. Even Jill was struggling and coughing, eyes watering and repulsed back to the wall of the enclosure by the acrid smell. Skunk spray, rotten eggs, a mountain of sulfur, too strong garlic, burning tires, and more all at once. I could only wince miserable until my eyes cleared.

Jodi had donned a respirator but had no intention of sharing one with anyone else. Through the muffled filter I heard her say, "Now you'll really be sorry for what you did to me!" Like a woman possessed she began laughing and pelting my body with thick, messy pies until my ridiculous costume was coated in the mess. Jill watched mortified until she finally had enough. "STOP IT!" She yelled. Jodi ignored her pleas.

Jill armed herself with two pies and sandwiched Jodi's perfect hair, clogging the respirator's valves. Jodi ripped off the face mask only to gasp for air at the stench. Jill took the opportunity to undo the pillory and free me before roughly dragging Jodi to the restraints. Jodi fought back, slamming pies into Jill's pretty blonde hair and delicate features. Jill slipped on a pie tin and began to fall. She wrapped her arms around Jodi's thighs tight, pulling her skirt down with a rip as she fell. With her legs bound by her own skirt, she as no match for Jill's lithe athleticism. Jill lifted Jodi up and dragged her to the stocks, forcing her neck into the opening before pulling the top board down over her head and locking the hasp with a familiar looking European style padlock.

Jodi let loose a barrage of threats and expletives as she fought helplessly against the pillory's embrace. Jill walked around behind her and slapped a thick cream pie into the waistband of her exposed panties and ground it into her ass with a flourish. She cut away Jodi's expensive suit coat and deposited two chocolate cream pies over Jodi's perfect breasts. finally, Jill grabbed her seltzer bottle from the table and unleashed a deluge of stinky skunk spray, coating Jodi until she was dripping with the vile stinking skunk oil. Jill turned to me and wrapped me in a messy, pie coated, and very stinky hug.

"I'm so sorry I did this to you! I had no idea how awful she was." Jill apologized.
"It's not your fault, I should still have behaved like an adult." I offered. "There is one thing, though." I added. I lifted a thick sloppy blackberry cream pie from the table and gently smushed it into Jill's perfect face with a twist, sending a flood of sticky purple down Jill's top. "That's for the skunk pie." I grinned. Jill stuck her tongue out at me cheekily and smiled. She offered me her hand and we headed for the exit together.

"You know, if you really want revenge on me I still have a bunch of skunk pies at home," Jill said wistfully. She whispered in my ear, "Did I mention I really, REALLY like skunks?" she purred before wrapping me in a deep kiss.