My first new story in years! Hope you enjoy. If you do (or don't), feel free to comment!



Eva was no master at disguising her boredom. Sat in the sterile environment of the lecture hall, she circled her long, curvy, naturally blonde hair around her fingers and let out a voiceless sigh, masked by the low-frequency hush of the air conditioning behind her and the unpacking of bags from her fellow students.

This was no place to spend a sunny Friday afternoon. She placed her left elbow on the desk in front of her and propped up her head by resting her rosy cheek in her hand. With the other hand, she drummed her manicured fingernails against the wooden surface, an audible display of her impatience.

Though she was a likeable enough girl, Eva demanded attention. More so than that, she enjoyed mischief and controversy. It was probably rooted in her upbringing as a somewhat spoilt only child, plus a youth spent reading comics like the Beano and being inspired by the pranks and mayhem caused by the characters. Even at 20 years of age, old habits died hard, and she found a thrill in winding people up, taking satisfaction not so much from the schadenfreude but as the attention lavished on her as the instigator. She liked people to look at her with incredulity and think "wow, did she really just do that?"

Behind her, three sporty young men from her course, named Ryan, Jonathan and Patrick , took their seats in their typically noisy and only barely punctual fashion, seeing as the lecture was set to begin in precisely two minutes. Eva couldn't help but eavesdrop on their conversation.

"So, where we going tonight?"
"Start in the White Horse, eh, and see where we go from there?"
"Yeah, sounds good."
"I just wanna get hammered."
"Same here, mate"
"That new breakfast place opens tomorrow, doesn't it?"
"Oh that one on Bridge Street?"
"Yeah, sounds like they do the lot. Fry ups, waffles, cereal, porridge, just about anything you could have for breakfast."
"Could give it a try in the morning? Sounds a decent hangover cure!"
"Haha yeah!"

Eva's ears pricked on the word "porridge". Suddenly an idea flickered in her mind. A chance for some high-jinx. An opportunity to be the centre of attention. Potential to catch the eyes of the boys.

Of the three, she particularly liked Patrick, who seemed a tad more sensitive and caring than the other two. She envisaged him as better boyfriend material, imagining he would afford her the attention she craved and felt she deserved. If she was honest with herself though, it had been over four months since she had split up with her long-distance boyfriend and she just needed to get fucked, and any of those three fit lads would do nicely.

Suddenly lost in a trance, her heavenly blue eyes floated dreamily around the room. She licked her lips pensively and did her best to focus as the lecture began.

***

Saturday morning, and the student halls were once again basking in May sunshine. Eva shuffled around the site, wearing a tight-fitting red top that hugged her ample breasts, a knee-length skirt and a lightweight pair of sandals. Showing off her legs, she preferred to embrace her Celtic, porcelain white skin rather than apply fake tan, and the glittery blue polish on her toenails stood out against the pale complexion of her legs and feet.

The new cafe closed at 12. If she knew the boys as well as she thought she did, it would be at least 11 before they dragged themselves out of their pits after their Friday night session, but perhaps she didn't, as here it was at 10:30 and she was looking at the three of them up and about, looking ready for a generous breakfast as they walked towards the town centre. Yikes, she thought, better get ready!

Eva raced back to her room, kicking her sandals off as soon as she got through the door. She'd certainly need a change of footwear to pull off this stunt for a start. But she needed that costume she'd worn at that fancy dress party last year, which was in her wardrobe somewhere, but where? The wardrobe, and indeed the whole room, was big, as Eva's well-to-do parents had shelled out on high-end student accommodation for their special girl. Standing on the tiptoes of her bare feet (at 5'4" she was on the petite side) and sticking her pert backside out in the process, she leant right into the wardrobe. "Aha!", she said out loud, "right at the back!"

A long pair of white stockings would be necessary, and the shoes, which she knew were under her bed, would complete the outfit. She reached for her phone to check the time. There was no major rush as she didn't want to get there before the boys, but certainly before they left. She allowed herself ten minutes to relax and get in character, then set off.

***

Ryan, Jonathan and Patrick sat bleary-eyed in the new cafe, recoving from the night before with hot, sweet coffee as they waited for their breakfast to arrive. The large cafe was enjoying healthy business on its opening morning, but there were tables unoccupied. Somebody was about to take one of them now, an unusually dressed character who the lads couldn't help but notice as she came through the door.

"Hey look, that's Eva, isn't it?" said Patrick.

The three of them talked about Eva often. She was an enigma to them. There was no doubt she was good to look at, but as far as her tomboyish personality went, they couldn't work out whether she was funny, mean or just immature. A bit of all three, maybe.

"Yeah it is," answered Ryan. "What has she got on? She looks like Goldilocks!"

They laughed, but they had correctly recognised Eva's intention. She was sporting a gold, frilly dress with black lacing on the front and plenty of cleavage on show, together with knee-length white stockings and black, buckled shoes. Her long, blonde, wavy locks were untied and flowing. It was a saucy, grown-up Goldilocks outfit.

"Why would you come in here, on your own, dressed like that?" Ryan went on.
"She's not right, that girl!" said Jonathan.
"Ah, she's OK", said Patrick, "just a bit quirky." He had to agree it was a strange choice of outfit for a breakfast, but he rather liked the look of Eva in it and wasn't complaining.

Eva's eyes met the boys' and she flashed them a friendly wave. Immediately, she spotted a perfect table that was not right next to theirs, but in their eyeline. She skipped over to it and took her seat with a mischievous grin on her face.

"Morning madam," said a waiter who had spotted her. "Would you like a menu?"

"No thanks, Jack!" replied Eva, noticing the waiter's name badge. "I know what I want. I'd like some porridge, please."

Jack took down her order and headed into the kitchen, struggling to keep a straight face at the idea of a girl dressed like Goldilocks ordering porridge. As well as that, he was sure he recognised her from somewhere, but he couldn't think where. He had a feeling it wasn't a good memory though.

Eva's porridge didn't take long to arrive. Nonetheless she spent most of the time she was waiting for it impatiently banging her spoon and fork on the table, really playing up to the character of a fairy-tale brat. Quite a few diners in the cafe were beginning to notice her disruptive behaviour.

Jack returned to Eva's table with a bowl of steaming hot porridge. Eva took a spoonful, raised the spoon to her lips and immediately threw it to the table with a noisy clatter. Her hand shot up and she began clicking her fingers to get the waiter's attention.

"Er...excuse me?" she called out.

Jack hastily made his way back to the table. "Everything OK, madam?" he asked politely.

"No," said Eva. "This porridge is too hot!"

Jack spluttered. Now this Goldilocks character was saying her porridge was too hot? Was this some sort of practical joke? It was a strange complaint anyway wasn't it, since porridge is supposed to be served hot? Still, it was his first day on the job and the cafe's first day of opening, so he didn't want to create a scene. Obediently, he took the porridge bowl back into the kitchen and stirred plenty of milk into it.

The grinning Eva didn't have time to draw too much more attention to herself before a bowl of much less steamy porridge was placed before her once again. Jack quickly moved on to another table, but he was beckoned back by the sound of that pretty but increasingly annoying Goldilocks girl clicking her bratty fingers again.

"Yes, madam?" he said, a little more wearily this time.

"THIS porridge is too c-c-c-cold!" stammered Eva, shivering and hugging herself in an exaggerated fashion.

Now she had to be winding him up! Wordlessly, he took the bowl and made yet another trip back to the kitchen.

Eva was giggling inside but did her best to maintain a straight face. It was great fun to irritate people while they had to stay professional. As she sat in front of her empty table though, it occurred to her that she wasn't sure where to take this joke next. She had done the "too hot" and "too cold" thing, but she hadn't really thought any further along than that. Ah well, maybe not her best prank ever, but fun while it lasted, and the three attractive boys had noticed it. She could just enjoy her porridge now.

But little did Eva realise that the prank was only just beginning. Because as he made his way back to the kitchen muttering about his difficult customer, Jack suddenly remembered where he had seen Eva before. It wasn't the first time she'd played a trick on him. It had happened just a few months earlier, and maybe it was Eva's mime of coldness that brought the memory back.

___

January was never the nicest of months in this part of England, but this year's had been particularly bleak. With the temperature below freezing and a biting wind coming in off the coast, Jack considered foregoing his usual Wednesday morning swim in the university pool. When he braved it though, he was relieved to find that the changing rooms were warm as he stripped into his Speedos and donned his blue goggles, and the water was the perfect temperature as he dived in and started on a few lengths.

Also out and about that morning was Eva, huddled under a big padded coat, her blonde hair showing under a woolly bobble hat and her feet hugged by a pair of winter faux-fur boots. As she walked past the swimming baths, it crossed her mind that while she was well wrapped in her winter woollies, the people on the other side of that wall would hardly be wearing anything at all. Boys and girls, more or less in their underwear. Her mind raced from there and, uh-oh, Eva was soon in the mood for a glorious piece of mischief.

The fire exit had been left ajar. On it was a notice saying that no outdoor footwear was to be worn at poolside, so Eva took off her boots and socks and left them outside before slinking through the door. Immediately, she was glad of the warm, steamy environment of the pool and even the heat of the floor felt good against the soles of her feet, but she wasn't here to get comfortable.

She found what she was looking for right by the door and drew back her clenched fist, looking around to see if anyone had their eye on her. As it happened, one swimmer did, a male wearing blue goggles who had just finished a length, his dark hair matted against his head. He had seen Eva, and spotted exactly what she was about to do.

"Oh no, don't you even..."

It was too late, Eva looked back at him with a devilish grin on her face, and thumped the fire alarm button with her fist. An ear-piercing siren wailed across the pool, causing heads to turn and the lifeguards beside the pool to get on their feet.

"Everyone out the pool and out the building please!" boomed one of them. "We're not expecting a drill!"

"That fucking girl!" grumbled Jack as he climbed out the pool. "Hey, it's a false alarm!" he called out. "Someone set it off on purpose!" but nobody could hear him over the noise.

"Straight out the fire door please, no time to go back in the changing room!" ordered another lifeguard, preventing some swimmers from even getting a towel to protect their modesty and fend off the chill.

"I saw a girl set it off deliberately," said Jack to a lifeguard now that he had come nearer to them. "Can't you just turn it off?"

"Sorry, we have to treat it seriously. Out please!" answered the lifeguard, ushering Jack towards the fire exit Eva had quickly scampered out of.

So poor Jack and a dozen or so other semi-dressed swimmers had no choice but to shiver in the freezing cold as the lifeguards went through a slow and tedious box-ticking exercise. The only positive was that opposite him were two lovely looking ladies - one with long legs and long red hair, and a voluptuous black girl with huge tits. They were soaking wet, barefoot and scantily clad, no doubt regretting their choice of bikini-style swimming costumes as the icy cold air made their nipples pert. But Jack too was in nothing but his Speedos and the last thing he wanted right now was a hard-on. In fact he felt like his balls had shrank back into his body!

Worse still, the commotion had alerted the students in the multi-floor university library opposite the pool, many of whom were now gazing out of the window to get an aerial view of the swimmers' miserable and embarrassing predicament. And, as a final humiliation, Jack clocked the blonde girl who had caused all this trouble, laughing and pointing at him from behind a hedge. She fled around the corner before Jack could do anything but scowl at her.

___

So, with Jack now being on the receiving end of Eva's troublemaking antics for a second time, you couldn't blame him for wanting to get even. What he was about to do could well get him sacked on his first shift, but he was only here for some beer money anyway. And boy, did that girl have it coming! He was going to enjoy this!

Accepting that her little joke might be coming to an end, Eva was woken from her thoughts by the noise of another bowl being placed on the table in front of her. This bowl was enormous - more like a mixing bowl than one you would eat out of, and was filled to the brim with warm, gloopy porridge.

"There you go, madam!" said Jack. "An extra large portion for you this time, and it's on us!"

"Ah, really? Thank you so much!" said Eva. It was far more porridge than she would be able to eat, but she appreciated the gesture.

"Well, actually" said Jack, with a note of rising tension in his voice, "I say it's on us, but really, it's about to be on YOU!"

"What do you mean?" asked a puzzled Eva, who realised Jack had grabbed a tuft of her thick blonde hair at the back of her head. What on earth was he doing?

Jack gave Eva a knowing smile. "Enjoy!" he taunted, before pushing her head forwards and dunking her face into that bowl of warm, sloppy porridge.

Eva's first sensation was a gobful of the thick, oaty porridge, which was inevitable as she had instinctively opened her mouth in surprise. That was quickly followed by a noseful, and then she felt its warmth and gooeyness around her eyes, which were tight shut. Either side of her face, she felt some of the porridge overflowing out of the bowl. Once her ears became submerged, the noise of the cafe was reduced to a distorted murmur. Feeling Jack's hand against the back of her head, nuzzling her into the bowl, she blubbered into the gloop, wondering how long she was going to be held in there.

It must have been no longer than a couple of seconds before Jack pulled her back out by her hair, but she was nonetheless gasping for breath. That was probably more from shock than anything. He did NOT just do that! What had she done to deserve it? And in front of all these people too, almost all of whom had noticed and were staring at her.

Eva blinked a few times to try and regain her vision, noting that there was even porridge in her eyelashes. But wait, Jack was now gently but firmly pulling her hair back a little further, forcing her to look directly up.

"Of course," he said "we recommend it with maple syrup!"

Oh no! Surely he wouldn't? Surely a facefull of porridge was punishment enough? But she heard the top get flipped off that squeezy plastic container and there was no denying that she was about to get a good dose of that sticky syrup all over her face. Jack started by squirting it at her nose, purely because that was the centre of the face, then zigzagged across her cheeks, eyes and forehead. Eva could hear gasps, chuckles and winces from the audience viewing her treatment as the syrup clogged up in her hair. She could not believe what this waiter was doing to her, but for some reason, even though she could easily have broken free, something was compelling her to just accept her fate.

She couldn't help but open her mouth as Jack squirted a helping of syrup into it, then closing it and allowing the sweet goo to drool past her lips and down her cheeks and chin. Finally, she heard the bottle get slammed back down on the table, only to be stuck by the fear that she didn't think the syrup had been the only condiment in front of her.

"And maybe some chocolate sauce?" Jack continued, sure enough. Still forcing Eva to look straight up, he gave her another good lashing of dessert sauce to the face, this time an oozy brown chocolate mess. Again, she took some of it in the mouth and even found herself sticking her tongue out - was that a "yuck" gesture or did she want to lap it up? She had to admit it was delicious! Feeling vulnerable and exposed, she knew that everyone in cafe was now looking at her, intrigued by this badly behaved but very pretty girl getting a messy forfeit.

"And topped off with some treacle!" continued Jack.

Oh my word, thought Eva, hearing anguished "ooh" noises and semi-sympathetic mutterings as Jack emptied some of that dense, jet-black gunk out of the tin and onto her face. It really cloyed into her hair and made a heavy splat as it hit her face, with Jack helping it out with a teaspoon. It had tangible weight as it trickled around her mouth, and a bitter but not unpleasant taste as some of it seaped past her teeth.

With Jack still holding her hair with his left hand to keep her facing upwards, he used his right hand to dollop what was left of the treacle, syrup and chocolate into that huge bowl of porridge that was still in front of her, creating a sticky, lumpy dishful of mess. Eva had no choice but to sit and wait for whatever was coming next, or rather she did have a choice but for whatever reason felt compelled to just sit there and... take it.

Then suddenly, Jack leant closer to Eva, whispering so only she could hear.

"Remember that swimming pool incident?" her asked her.

"Wha-?" was all she could say in response, gurgling a little on the syrup in her mouth. She didn't hear him that well either as her ears were still a bit clogged with porridge.

"That little fire alarm prank, while I was in pool?"

Oh god, it was him wasn't it? That swimmer! She hadn't recognised him without his blue goggles, matted wet hair and, well, with his clothes on!

"Consider this my revenge!" he said softly. "Ready to take the plunge again?"

Eva knew what was coming - she was about to get a second dunking into the porridge, which was now even gooier than before. This time she at least had time to take a deep breath before WHOOMPH! Forward went her face into that sloppy, off-white gloop laced with sticky sauces. Jack released Eva's hair meaning she was free to lift her head out of the bowl, but she didn't immediately. Instead, she was thinking. The sounds of the cafe had gone muffled again but she was sure she could hear laughing and cheering. It gradually dawned on Eva that as a prankster herself, she just had to say fair do's to Jack. She absolutely and completely deserved what had just happened to her. What's more, now that the shock of the whole ordeal had worn off, this didn't actually feel so bad. The porridge was nice and warm for a start, and the mixture tasted delightful. Still face down in the bowl, she took in a good mouthful, with some air escaping her lungs as she did it and causing her to blow bubbles into the porridge.

Perhaps best of all, EVERYONE in the place was now looking at her. To an exhibitionist and attention seeker like Eva, that was a good thing. It didn't matter that she had been made a fool of, all she cared about was that all eyes were on her. She thought it was about time she lifted up her head and let everyone see the state of her face. She did it slowly, her mouth open in a gasp and her eyes closed tight. As the mess cascaded down her face and neck, onto her cleavage and down her dress, it was only now that she started to take in what it physically felt like. It was really squidgy and slippery.

"You can't say you didn't deserve that!" taunted a voice nearby that sounded like Jonathan's. She nodded her head solemnly in quiet agreement with these words.

Now that Eva was sat upright and making a spectacle of her porridge-strewn face, Ryan suddenly had an idea of his own. His eye had been bigger than his belly when he had ordered, and a Belgian waffle topped with yoghurt and syrup sat in front of him untouched. He scooped it up and cocked back his right hand. "You deserve this too!" he cried, and summoning all the power and accuracy he had developed from being bowler on the university cricket team, he hurled the waffle through the air.

Eva, meanwhile, was still mouth agape, thinking now was probably the time to turn her expression into a smile and show she was taking her porridgy punishment in good humour. But suddenly, her thoughts were interrupted as a floppy circle flew into her face with a wet splat! Glumph, where did that come from?

Her impromptu audience gasped and shrieked, not sure whether to laugh or sympathise. She heard a voice go "whoa, right in the face!" Indeed, not only did the yoghurt-topped waffle hit her face, it was stuck there! Eva couldn't hide her emotions anymore and started to chuckle, but because her face was obscured by the waffle, all anyone watching her could see was her shoulders quivering. Without being able to gauge her facial expression, it was hard to tell whether she was laughing or crying.

Slowly, the sticky waffle peeled away from her face and, at last, everyone could see her amused smile, still pretty and alluring despite the state of her porridge-splattered face. She looked and felt ridiculous. To think of the trouble she had gone to (getting dressed up, timing her arrival and practicing her lines) all for a lame joke that didn't go anywhere. And Jack had made something up on the spot that had completely owned her. There was no doubt about it, Eva had been well and truly outpranked!

Yet it wasn't an unpleasant experience, that was the strange thing. She felt like a pantomime villain who had got her comeuppance, but was still enjoying her role and the joke being on her. There was still plenty of porridge in the bowl. She thought about faceplanting it voluntarily, just to give her audience another treat, but uh-oh, here comes Jonathan. What was he planning?

Jonathan scooped up the bowl in front of Eva, who looked up at him from her chair. "Loads of it in your face," he said "but I think he's missed a spot in your hair!"

With that, he dumped the bowl upside down on top of her head. Sometimes you don't realise how much is in a container until someone spills it. The bowl being plonked on her head felt like being gunged from above. The gooey porridge trickled down her face and slid down her back, prompting her mouth to go into an O of surprise once again. It was on her shoulders, down her bra and she was sure she could even feel it inside her knickers. How could the contents of one bowl get her in such a mess?

Feigning annoyance, she slowly lifted the bowl off her head and firmly placed it on the table with an audable clunk. She realised how quiet the cafe had gone. They were waiting for her to say something, maybe? The prank had been executed and now it was time for Eva to deliver the punchline. So, lifting her chin up and looking straight ahead, she slowly licked her lips, circling her tongue right around them. After collecting plenty of the sticky, saucy oats on her tongue, drawing them into her mouth and swallowing them exaggeratedly, she raised her eyebrows to express approval and gave the closing line of her ordeal.

"Well, I must say, THIS porridge is juuuuust right!"

The diners laughed and applauded. Although she was the victim of the prank, Eva had become the people's star of the show by taking it with such humour. She basked in their appreciation for a few seconds, wiped some of the gunk off her face, then scampered out of the cafe to go home and get showered.

***

Though Eva had rather enjoyed her public dunking, she immediately realised this walk home would be a lot less fun. Without the context of the messy session, walking home alone with remnants of porridge in her hair, face and clothes would be pretty embarrassing. She started walking briskly, realising that the quicker she walked, the sooner she'd be back at the student hall.

"Hey, you OK?" came a voice from behind her.

"Whu? Er, yeah..." said a dazed Eva, turning round to see Patrick checking on her welfare. Ah, she was right about him, he was the sweetest of the three of them! That cute smile returned to her face.

Patrick galloped over to her, returning the grin. For a few seconds, they both simply stood together giggling at her predicament. Eva looked up at Patrick, who was well over six feet tall, and swooned at his tough but soulful green eyes, and how his light brown hair grew in a naturally spiky way.

"You can't walk back to the digs on your own looking like that. Come on, I'll walk back with you!" said Patrick.

She was delighted to have anyone walking back with her, but especially the lovely Patrick, who she'd only really spoken to briefly before now. On the short walk back they chatted happily and naturally about things like the course, lecturers and student life. Eva almost forgot what a state she was in, although every now and again she would be reminded by a squidge in her dress or a slither of porridge seeping down her cleavage.

"That was a bit mean of the waiter, wasn't it?" said Patrick after a pause, turning the conversation back to the messy incident. "You were only having a giggle, he did need to humiliate you like that."

'Humiliate' was an interesting word to use. She didn't feel humiliated, or did she? Perhaps she did but had enjoyed it?

"It wasn't the first time I'd played a prank on him," said Eva, chewing guiltily on her bottom lip. "I had it coming. A dunking was probably the least I deserved." She liked talking to Patrick like this. Using those words somehow felt submissive and sexy.

Before long, Eva's high-end student accommodation was in sight. Patrick would be walking on to the budget halls further down the road.

"Well, thanks for walking me home, I appreciate it," said Eva, realising immediately that by saying that she was drawing their time together to an end even though she didn't want to.

"No problem," said Patrick, chuckling a little. "I've enjoyed chatting with you."

"Me too," said Eva, sensing the opportunity to keep things going. "You wanna come in for a coffee?"

"Yeah, why not?" he said chirpily, "even though I've had tons of the stuff at the cafe!"

"You could have tea if you like, or I'll see what else we've got" she went on. "Oh, shut up about hot drinks, Eva!" she scolded herself, "he's coming in, that's the important thing!"

The two of them went through the door and Eva immediately took off her shoes. "Urgh, there's even porridge in my socks!" she moaned, taking them off as well. Patrick laughed as she brushed her shins and ankles. If Eva had had no inhibitions, she'd be taking off a lot more than just her shoes and socks in front of him, but that would do for now. She walked barefoot into the communal kitchen and switched on the kettle.

"Which one of you threw the gooey waffle in my face?" asked Eva, turning to Patrick.

"That was Ryan," Patrick answered. "I couldn't believe it just stuck there!"

"Yeah, I bet it was funny!" said Eva. "I'm hoping someone filmed it so I can watch it again. "

"It was pretty funny!"

"And Jonathan dumped the bowl on my head. So you didn't get me messy at all?"

"No," said Patrick. "I kind of wanted to but I wasn't sure you were cool with it. I thought you might have been upset."

What a heart of gold this lad had! He deserved a treat.

"That's sweet of you," said Eva, "but I don't see why you should miss out on the fun!"

She grabbed a paper plate from the kitchen cupboard, then pulled an unopened container of squirty cream out of the fridge. "Go on, make a pie!" she said.

"You sure?" Patrick laughed, although he didn't need a second invitation. Eva nodded, and he proceeded to squirt the entire can onto the paper plate, creating a giant cloud of cream.

"Hey, I think there's some dessert sauces in the fridge as well," Eva remembered. "Chocolate and strawberry, I think?"

"Let's go strawberry!" said Patrick, grabbijg the pink bottle. "Keep things interesting. You've had a chocolate shower already!"

Eva chuckled. She realised she was simply standing there, in her own kitchen, waiting for a guy to create a big, messy, sticky pie he could splat into her face. Why was this such an exciting prospect? Was the excitement sexual? Was there something about the vulnerability of being at this handsome lad's mercy that was turning her on? It was a confusing feeling, but she was sure this was getting her going.

"How's this?" Patrick asked, presenting the pie. It was very much a makeshift effort. Whipped cream doesn't have the best consistency for a pie being used as a missile, quickly losing its shape and turning sloppy. The paper plate was getting soggy and he had completely overdone it with the sticky strawberry sauce, but hey, this was sexy, spontaneous fun.

"Oh, is that pie for me?" Eva gushed, deliberately playing a complete airhead.

"It sure is!" smirked Patrick. "Would you like it now?"

"I certainly would," replied Eva, placing both hands behind her back and leaning forward a little. "Let me have it!"

"Hmm, what did you say?" asked Patrick, padding out the dialogue before it reached it's inevitable conclusion.

"I said let me have...ummmph!" said Eva, her retort muffled mid-sentence by a pie in the face. Patrick smushed and rubbed that gooey, gunky pie right into her face and hair, tilting her neck back a little. Eva was just laughing out loud now, giggling as she submissively enjoyed Patrick's rather drawn out and punishing pieing technique.

After a good few seconds of rubbing it around Eva's face, Patrick finally pulled the paper plate away, a string of strawberry sauce clinging to it from her hair. Eva felt glorious, and instinctively threw her arms around Patrick. What a bizarre, sensational and erotic feeling this was. She began to wonder if there were people who included pies in the face as part of their sex life. If not, she might well be doing it from now on!

What Patrick said next changed everything though.

"Uh, Eva..." he stammered nervously. "I- I really like you, you know?"

Wow, those were wonderful words to hear, and what a state she was in to hear them! See looked him in the eye, as solemnly as she could through a facefull of cream and syrup, and whispered "I like you too..." Rising onto her tiptoes due to the difference in height between them, Eva kissed Patrick on the lips and the two of them started to wrestle with their tongues. Patrick didn't seem to care that bits of pie residue were going onto his face, and even licked Eva's cheeks once or twice to lap some of it up.

Eva giggled. She broke off from the kiss and licked her top lip. Did she dare say what was on her mind? Yes, yes, what the hell, let's go for it!

"...and I'll level with you, Patrick, I really need to get fucked!"

Patrick gasped. He hadn't expected things to move along that quickly, but Eva was that kind of girl. She wanted sex and so did he, so why waste time?

"C'mon!" teased Eva, loosely grabbing Patrick's left wrist and playfully whisking him through to her room. They stopped outside the shower (Eva's luxury accommodation came with an en suite bathroom too), where Eva threw her Goldilocks costume over her head and stood before Patrick in just her underwear. Patrick looked transfixed. Eva unclipped her bra and hurled it off, revealing a sizeable pair of bare, pert breasts. Her cleavage had acted as a filter for the gunge that had seaped down her body, with a thin line of it extending from there to her belly button, and continuing towards the rim of her knickers. As Eva slowly loosened those knickers and let them drop to her feet, Patrick was left in no doubt that Eva was a natural blonde.

Completely naked, Eva put her hands on her hips and stood upright and confident. "Now let's see what you've got!" she purred.

Awoken from his private stripshow, Patrick eagerly ripped off his T-shirt and unbuttoned his jeans. In his excitement, he'd forgot he would need to take his shoes off first. Somewhat ungracefully, he removed his shoes and socks while his trousers were already round his ankles. Eva admired Patrick's muscular body and bit her lip with anticipation as he gradually lowered his boxer shorts.

"Wooooaaahh, that's a big 'un!" said Eva. Patrick blushed and laughed a little, seemingly not sure how to respond.

"Yeah, I'm happy with it!" he eventually replied. His long penis seemed to get a little stiffer and higher as he said it, pointing up and curving to the left a degree at the top, with two well-formed balls dangling beneath.

Eva switched on the shower. "Might as well get clean while we get it on!" quipped Eva. "Come on in!"

Patrick suddenly seemed apprehensive. "Uh, Eva, I think you should know that this is my first time," he said with a slight quiver in his voice.

That surprised Eva, as you would think a lad as good looking as him wouldn't have had any shortage of offers, but then again, he was humble, modest and charmingly shy. And it was good of him to tell her that she was about to take his virginity off him.

"Hey, no worries, I can show you the ropes", said Eva saucily. "Just relax. We're gonna have some fun, OK?"

"OK!" said Patrick, breathing deeply. He was nervous, but very excited too. Eva took a couple of steps back, deliberately positioning herself against the wall of the shower, and moaned "shag me, Paddy!"

***

As the shower beat down on their bodies, Eva and Patrick had just the sort of sex you would imagine an excited virgin and a sex-starved nymphomaniac to have. A little rough and stop-start, but hugely passionate and enjoyable. Eva, who had stayed on the pill after splitting with her ex just so that her next screw would be as uncomplicated as possible, wrapped her arms and legs around Patrick, crossing her feet at the ankles so she was wedged between the shower wall and Patrick's body, his rock hard cock up her vagina, skewering her in mid-air. They thrusted, grunted and gasped. Patrick had to close his eyes for a lot of it as the sight of Eva's soaking wet hair, flesh and bouncing boobs threatened to push him over the edge. Panting each other's names between ravenous kisses, they got a few minutes out of each other before cumming simultaneously.

***

"Well, I never got that coffee you invited me in for!"

Eva laughed out loud. Patrick's sense of humour was endearingly dorky. Maybe they were both dorks? The thought went through her mind as they sat side by side in the shower, stark naked, basking in the satisfaction of their mutual orgasm.

"That was awesome!" said Patrick, putting his right arm around Eva's shoulder and running his left hand down her left leg from her thigh down to her ankle.

"Yeah, I feel great after that!" Eva beamed. "And the weird thing is, it felt like it was getting messy in the cafe that got me in a horny mood. Just something about everyone watching me while I got splattered in that outfit. I loved it!"

"You know, I was definitely getting hard at the thought of putting that pie in your face!" Patrick laughed. "Maybe we've got a fetish for it?"

"You reckon there's such a thing?"

"Bet ya there is! I'll look it up on the internet later."

Eva loved the thought that her and Patrick shared a fetish. And the messy factor did feel like more than just a novelty. It was something she would love to do again.

"You wanna spend the afternoon together?" Eva asked Patrick coyly.

"Sounds great, Eva!" said Patrick, "I just have to go to the shop though. I'll be back in a sec."

"Sure, I'll stay in the shower for a bit longer. Think I've still got some treacle in my hair!" Eva laughed.

Patrick ruffled Eva's wet hair playfully. "Yeah, maybe!" he laughed as he made his way out the shower and started to get dry and dressed.

"I'll probably still be in the shower when you get back," said Eva, "but the front door and bedroom door will be unlocked. Just shout when you come back in so I know it's you."

***

With the help of a hairbrush and a lot of shampoo, Eva had finally got all the gunk out of her curly blonde hair. She decided to stay naked in the shower and wait for Patrick to return. Maybe they could have some more fun in there yet?

"Just me!" Patrick called as he knocked on Eva's door and immediately entered, greeted by the pleasant sight of wet and naked Eva on the floor of the shower.

"I think my hair is finally ok," said Eva. She liked the vulnerable feeling of being naked in front of Patrick. She started to walk her feet up the glass door of the shower, extending her legs so that Patrick could get a glimpse of her pussy. Patrick seemed more interested in Eva's feet though, with his gaze following her soles as they walked and pressed against the glass. Well, if feet were his thing, she would be happy to indulge that.

Patrick opened the shower door and handed Eva his phone. "Look!" he said, "I told you it would be a thing!"

Eva took the phone and looked at a Wikipedia page on "Wet and messy fetishism", accompanied by a picture of a woman whose hair and face appeared to be covered in cream.

"Maybe that's our kink?" Patrick smirked, and he held out a hand towards Eva. "Wammers?"

Eva grinned and clutched his hand firmly. "Wammers!" she agreed, winking at him as she spoke.

Patrick's smirk had developed into a mischievous grin. He was up to something.

"Well, I think this calls for a celebration," he announced, reaching into the bag he had brought back from the shop. He grabbed two four-pint containers of ready made custard and held them over Eva. "What d'ya say?"

Eva gasped. She had just got clean, but the prospect of getting covered in custard with no clothes on was thrilling.

"Oh, you wouldn't!" she teased Patrick, giving him a seductive, innocent look.

"I think I would!" replied Patrick, who had started screwing the top off one of the bottles.

"But my hair!" Eva mock-protested. "I've just got it clean. Pleeeeeaaassee, not the custard!" She looked up at the now open bottle of custard, excited at what Patrick was surely about to do.

"Here it comes," he said. "Enjoy!"

Eva continuing to look up as Patrick tipped the bottle, causing the thick, pleasantly cool but not freezing cold custard to splash into her face. Eva shrieked playfully as it hit her nose and bounced up to her forehead before running into her hair. She had opened her mouth, perhaps in shock or perhaps as an invitation. Patrick took it as the latter, filling Eva's open mouth with custard as she waggled her tongue sexily from side to side.

After running it up and down her face a few more times, Patrick started to concentrate on Eva's cleavage, tipping the custard between her breasts so that it ran down her stomach towards her blonde pubic hair. Then each tit got its own helping of custard, stimulating her nipples as it oozed around them, and the last of the bottle went onto her chest, cascading over her pierced belly button.

But of course, that was just the first bottle, and as Patrick began to open the second, Eva had a daring idea: what would that custard feel like on my pussy?

So she lay back a little and opened her legs wide, revealing her wet cunt to this hunky lad. Patrick couldn't resist and poured half a bottle of custard all over Eva's vagina. Eva gasped and giggled as she felt the yellow gloop on her labia, savouring a strange but delightful sensation.

Patrick then grabbed Eva's heels and poured a generous amount of custard over her feet. "Yep, definitely a foot guy!", Eva thought, but it felt good and she wiggled her toes as the custard slithered between them and down her soles. The final dregs of the bottle were thrown directly into Eva's face, causing her to splutter and laugh.

Eva tasted some of the custard on her lips, thoroughly enjoying being nude and messy in front of Patrick, but it was about to get even better. Patrick eyed Eva's custard-covered cunt and thought it was time she got something more resembling a treat than a punishment. He got down on his knees and edged his head between Eva's thighs, planting a kiss on her vagina.

"Ohohoh, my god!" Eva shuddered, knowing she was going to have to control herself if she wanted this to last. She looked up, rolled her eyes back and moaned as Patrick ran his tongue up and down, then circled her clit, gently sucking on it. He may have been sexually inexperienced but he seemed to know exactly what he was doing here.

In the ecstasy, Eva had almost forgotten that she was covered in custard. She rubbed her nipples with her fingers, enjoying how the gloopy pudding felt on then. She licked her lips, taking in a delicious mouthful of custard. There she was licking one set of her lips while Patrick was licking the other!

That thought, and the all-round stimulation she was feeling, caused Eva to giggle. She wrapped her legs around Patrick's torso, pulling him a little closer. Feeling herself nearing orgasm, she scooped up two handfuls of custard from the shower floor and splatted them into the back of his head, forcing his face further into her crotch. As he sucked on her clit with his tongue curled in a U-shape below it, Eva gave one last shrill gasp and squirted into his face.

Patrick quickly got naked again and joined Eva in the shower, where they laughed and embraced in a custardy hug. Not surprisingly, he was hard again, which she would tend to shortly.

Both out of breath, they simply hugged for some time as Eva reflected on a strange but amazing day. She never imagined when she woke up that morning that by midday she would've been publicly gunged in a cafe. If that wasn't weird enough, within an hour of that happening, she was having sex. And now it felt like she had discovered a whole new side to her sexuality and, just maybe, someone to share it with.

Eva had had plenty on her face today, but all that custard, porridge and syrup would wash off in the shower. That beaming, lustful smile, however, would be there all weekend.