The titles finished rolling with the familiar banging down of the gavel, followed by the word 'Justice!' appearing on screen in large capital letters. The scene then quickly switched to the judge in his wig and robe, looking down the camera and preparing to open the show:

"Hello and welcome to 'Justice!', the show which gives you the chance to get the payback you deserve on those who have committed such awful crimes. If you are able to convince our jury that the person you are prosecuting deserves retribution, then retribution they will receive in the form of one of our spectacular punishments. Fail to convince the jury however, and you yourself will be facing the punishment for wasting court time. But what do the punishments look like I hear you ask? Well, lets have a recap of our last episode to give you an example."

The screen switched to show the last episode, a battle between vegan Laura and her sister who had fed her beef Sam. The screen showed the arguments of the girls, the demonstration of the punishment by 'Prisoner 1', followed by the vote reveal and Sam's indignation at having been found guilty. The screen then showed Sam being strapped to the cross, followed by her stinky assault of the liquidy rotten veg. Finally, some unseen footage of Sam being released from the cross was shown, still completely green and frantically clawing at her face trying to clean it, before miserably and moodily squelching across the muddy field back into the cage.

The screen then cut back to the judge who began to speak again:

"As you can see, it is high stakes stuff here. Let's meet today's plaintiff who will be attempting convince our jury that the defendant deserves something similar to what you have just seen. Plaintiff, please state your name, age and your place of residence."

The screen cut to a young slim woman, with mousy brown hair and a 'girl next door' style face.

"My name is Alice, I am 18 years old and I live in Cambridge".

"Thank you Alice", said the judge. "Now lets meet our defendant, please state your name, age and place of residence."

The camera cut to a woman older than Alice, but who bore a clear resemblance to the plaintiff. The defendant also had mousy brown hair, but had a much more impressive physique, clearly working out a lot.

"My name is Kelly, I am 38 years old and I live in Cambridge".

"Thank you Kelly", the judge said, turning to look at Alice as he said it. "I think we can all probably guess how you two are related, but Alice, please explain why you are attempting to prosecute Kelly today."

"Well, it was recently my 18th birthday, and I had invited my friends round for a party to celebrate. My mum has always been a big fitness freak and works at a gym, so has always been really strict about what I eat, however she said she would sort out the food for my party, and I trusted her to not get anything totally rubbish as it was my birthday. I was expecting things like chips, crisps, maybe even a pizza from our local Pizza Shack restaurant. Instead, I was presented with a salad, falafel and some weird grain like stuff that began with a Q. I thought it was really unfair that she embarrassed me in front of my friends like that, and therefore deserves to be punished." Alice spoke extremely quickly, barely pausing for breath between sentences.

"Thank you for that Alice. Assuming that Kelly here is your mum, Kelly what do you have to say in your defence?"

"Thank you judge, and yes I am indeed Alice's mum, and as such only want what is best for her. I don't want her eating loads of unhealthy food as I know how bad that stuff can be for you. If people understood the damage these foods did they wouldn't be so quick to gorge on them. In this instance however, as it was Alice's birthday I would have made an exception, however Alice neglected to tell me she had invited people round until the day before. I therefore had no time to buy any of the sort of food she wanted, and as such all I could serve was what was in the house. This claim therefore seems rather frivolous as it stems from Alice not telling me in time." Kelly spoke with much more confidence than her 18 year old daughter, clearly having preached about this numerous times to her.

"Well that seems a rather reasonable defence," said the judge, turning to look at Alice again. "Do you have anything to add Alice?"

Alice then began to speak again, this time with considerably more confidence:

"As a matter of fact I do judge, thank you. We live 5 minutes walk away from a small shop, and Pizza Shack do delivery, so the idea that there was no time to get any of the food I wanted is completely ridiculous. I basically became the laughing stock of my friendship group afterwards, now known as the girl who can only eat boring food. My mum has controlled the way I eat for so long and I think she needs to be punished for all her crimes against fun, exciting food, not horrible Q food."

"Quinoa darling, is the word you are looking for.", Kelly interjected. "And yes I will admit, I could have gone out of my way to get that food for you, but I also wanted to teach you a valuable lesson that you can't expect people to just drop what they are doing to fit your needs. Your father and I had planned to take you out to eat on your birthday, but we had to change this plan as you had invited your friends over without warning. So yes, whilst I did do it a little to embarrass you, I think it was quite justified. And as for the rest of the time, when you have your own place you are free to eat what you like, but under my roof the food will remain healthy, nutritious and most certainly not boring!" Kelly finished emphatically.

The judge then began to speak again;

"Well there we have it. Members of the jury it is now up to you to decide whether Kelly is guilty of ruining her daughter's birthday by buying boring healthy food, or whether Alice's tardiness in letting Kelly know of her plans is enough mitigation to find her not guilty. The decision is all yours, and you have until after the break to make your choice, when we will be revealing our now world famous prisoner's uniform, as well as which of Alice or her mum Kelly will be playing the part of a chip, and going for a dip. See you after the break!"

Hello and welcome to the second part of Justice!" began the judge, opening the second part of the show. "Before the break we heard the arguments of Alice and her mum Kelly. Alice is attempting to prosecute Kelly for ruining her birthday by only making boring health foods, whereas she was looking for something a little more unhealthy and exciting. Kelly countered this by saying that she had not been given notice, and that she was just doing the best for her darling daughter. Only one can win the argument however, and the loser of the argument, as decided by today's jury, will be facing some serious punishment. I think it is about time we revealed today's punishment, and reveal to our mother and daughter what one of them will be wearing when facing it. Please bring in 'Prisoner 1', and prepare to demonstrate today's punishment'Irresponsibly Sauced'."

No sooner had the judge finished speaking, than some stagehands brought in what looked to be a modified fairground ride. The ride in question was a 'drop ride', which had one main central column with a bar all around it. Usually this bar would contain seats which riders would sit on, however on three of the sides these had been removed and all that remained was the bar. On the fourth side however, there was another bar coming out horizontally at a 90 degree angle to the bar around the column. This bar continued for about 6 feet, before it took a 90 degree turn downwards, continuing down for another 8 feet until, at the bottom of the bar was attached a mesh chair. The chair had arms which featured restraints, as well as a strap to go round the occupant's midriff.

The camera turned to show the faces of Alice and Kelly. Alice was stunned, mouth half open at the sight of the contraption. Kelly had a rye smile, slightly intrigued by the contraption but also nervous at the thought of being the one strapped in. The judge then began to speak again;

"Doesn't it look impressive ladies and gentlemen. I can tell by these two ladies' faces that they think it is very impressive, but not in a good way for them. At the minute however, it just looks like a modified fairground ride, so lets strap in 'Prisoner 1' and show how this bad boy works."

'Prisoner 1' had been brought on by another stagehand unnoticed, as all the attention had been on the huge punishment machinery. The crash test dummy was as usual sporting the grey midriff revealing t-shirt and upper thigh ending shorts, all with the regular black arrows just to prove it was a prisoner's uniform. The dummy was taken to the mesh chair, having its arms strapped into the restraints on the arm of the chair, and having the strap placed around its hip/waist area. Once securely strapped in, the stagehands stepped back, allowing the machine to raise up slowly, ultimately stopping around 30 feet above the floor. As the chair was being raised, more stagehands wheeled in a 10 feet deep tank of water, placing it below the protruding chair, in the place where the chair had just been.

"I think we can all guess what happens next" said the judge, "But just for the avoidance of doubt"

As he said this, the chair holding 'Prisoner 1' plummeted down, the chair and the dummy fully submerging in the water. The chair was held under for a couple of seconds, before being lifted slowly back up into the sky-high position it started in.

"So there you go, one of you will be acting as one of the chips Alice never got at her birthday party, and taking a dip. However, we all know that chips are not dipped into water, so the tank will not be filled with water. Instead, it will be the old favourite of tomato ketchup which one of you will be taking a dip into. Well, taking a dip into for the first tank at least, as we also have tanks of barbecue sauce, garlic mayo, cheese sauce and 'The chip shop special', which is a mix of gravy, baked beans, curry sauce and mushy peas. We recognise that whilst this punishment is called 'Irresponsibly Sauced', some of those items aren't necessarily sauces, however try as they might our production team just could not find a clever way to fit the word 'condiment' into a punishment name! Oh, and good news ladies, I have just heard thatthe result is in."

Alice was now even more visibly nervous than she had been before, rocking up and down on her tiptoes and running her hands through her hair. She couldn't bear the thought of having to undergo the punishment, the embarrassment of not only having to wear the humiliating outfit, but of also the horrendous forfeit that followed. She knew she would never live it down within her friendship group if she lost. Kelly's previous intrigue had now almost entirely dissipated having seen and heard what could be coming her way, and whilst not as visibly nervous as Alice, she still felt the butterflies in her stomach as the judge addressed a man holding an envelope.

"Would the foreman of the jury please stand."

The man holding the envelope stood and began to open it.

"Thank you sir. On the charge of ruining her daughter's birthday by making healthy, boring food, do you find the defendant guilty or not guilty?" said the judge.
The man holding the envelope looked at the result and began to speak;

"We, the people of the jury, find the defendant" the man paused for effect, drawing out his part, before eventually revealing the result;

"NOT GUILTY!" he shouted.

"NOOO, NOO, NOO!" came the screams of the 18 year old Alice, as the result she dreaded was read out, and as two stagehands dressed as police officers handcuffed her hands behind her back.

"Alice, your mum has been found not guilty of the claims you brought against her. As such, the jury have concluded that these are frivolous claims, and that you have therefore wasted court time. Such deeds are dealt with here in the most severe fashion. Please take her down to custody and prepare her for punishment."

As Alice was being ushered off stage, she called back at her mum;

"Please mum stop this, please don't do this, I'll do anything."

"Sorry sweetheart", came Kelly's reply, "But you wanted to subject me to this so I think it is only fair you face this now that the people have sided with me."

Alice responded, however by this point she was offstage and was out of earshot. The judge then began to speak to Kelly;

"Well congratulations Kelly on receiving the first 'Not guilty' verdict in our show's history, how do you feel?"

"I feel wonderful judge, and whilst I do feel a little bad for Alice as I know she will absolutely hate this, I think in the long run this experience may be good for her, and will hopefully teach her that actions have consequences and that a little humility goes a long way." Responded Kelly

"Spoken like a true mother," laughed the judge. "It is time now to bring in your daughter though to face her punishment. Bring her in!"

The two stagehands dressed as policemen wheeled in the familiar one person cage, which today contained the most fearful looking occupant so far. The nerves and fear were evident on Alice's face as her cage was wheeled in, her hands cuffed through the bars of the cage. Once the cage had been brought in front of the judge, the cuffs were undone and the cage door opened, with Alice practically having to be dragged out and held in front of the judge by the two 'policemen'.

"Thank you gentlemen," said the judge. "Now, please get her in place and prepare her for punishment."

Alice was guided towards the chair by the two policemen, protesting as they did so;

"Please, I'm I'm I'm I'm afraid of heights!" she said in one final desperate attempt to avoid the inevitable.

"Is this true?" asked the judge to Kelly.

"It is not judge," Kelly responded.

"Well madam, I have a good mind to hold you in contempt of court," the judge said to Alice sternly. "However, as I'm really not sure how I can make this any worse for you, I am willing to let it go. Make sure her restraints are nice and tight though", the judge added, giving instruction to the policemen.

This was never not going to be the case of course, for safety reasons as much as discomfort reasons. Alice was nudged towards the mesh seat by the policemen and had her arms placed onto the arms of the chair, the restraints going over both wrists and both elbows. Finally, the seat strap was attached around her just below her bare belly button, the half cut t-shirt revealing the majority of the young woman's stomach. The shorts had ridden up as she sat down, and may as well not have even been there, due to how far they were now up her legs. After the stagehands had ensured she was securely strapped in, they stepped back and allowed the chair to climb. As it did, Alice could be heard whimpering under her breath "No, no, no, no", fully aware there was no escape now, and that soon her life as she knew it would be over, reduced to a figure of fun amongst her contemporaries, at least as soon as the show was broadcast that was.

Whilst Alice was still lost in her over-dramatic thoughts, creeping up to the top of the column, the large tank of ketchup was being wheeled in beneath her. The judge then began to address her;

"Alice, you brought a frivolous claim against your mother to this court, and as a result you are sat in the position you are in currently. We hope that this experience allows you to reflect on the error of your ways, and helps you understand why blaming other people and wanting retribution is not always the best course of action. The world does not always revolve around you, and as such you will pay the price. Commence punishment!" The judge included a slamming of his gavel as he shouted the final line.

No sooner has the gavel slammed down, than the terrified looking Alice began to plummet down from her high point above the rest of the studio. Screaming as she fell, she tucked her free hanging feet underneath the seat in a pointless attempt to keep them dry for a millisecond longer. They were soon very wet with ketchup however, as she reached the bottom of her journey, the fall slowing as she did so. The fall did not slow enough however, to prevent Alice's total submersion in the ketchup tank, her splashdown resulting in a wave of ketchup rising from the tank and splashing back down into it. The chair held its position for a couple of seconds before raising slowly, revealing the red humanoid blob that used to be Alice. She was in a state of shock, mouth wide open and spitting out the ketchup which she had inhaled due to her screaming on the way into the tank. Every part of her was soaked in the ketchup, from her dainty bare feet which were desperately kicking trying to get as much of the ketchup off as possible, right the way up her bare legs to her now completely soaked underpants, rising up her body, the t-shirt offering no protection whatsoever, all the way to her now completely red face, her features completely indiscernible. She was desperate to try and remove the ketchup from her face and now red soaked mid-back length hair, however the restraints on her arms were steadfast. In her opinion this was the most humiliating, embarrassing and just generally worst thing that had ever happened to her. And there were still four tanks to go.

Alice was so preoccupied in her own tomatoey world, that she hadn't noticed she had reached the top of the column again, and that she was now above a tank of barbecue sauce. She soon found out however, as she plummeted downwards once again, involuntarily screaming as she did, receiving another mouthful of sauce as she once again sunk beneath the mire in the tank, getting another soaking. She raised up out of the sauce once more, this time rather than a red humanoid blob, a brown humanoid blob emerged, dripping barbecue sauce down into the tank as it was wheeled away, being replaced by the extremely pungent garlic mayo. Even in Alice's current state of mind, which was almost like an out of body experience to her, she could smell the garlic mayo she was about the become well acquainted with. She scrunched up her barbecue sauce slathered face as she felt herself reach the top of the column again, and as she expected she began to plummet downwards towards the garlic mayo. This time however, she slowed halfway down the column and began to slowly rise again. This caused Alice to relax, thinking perhaps the machine was malfunctioning and that she would get some respite. This was foolish on her part however, as no sooner had she done this, than she began to drop again, crashing through the surface of the stinky white mixture. She was once again held under the surface for a couple of seconds, however given the unpleasant aroma around her it felt more like 2 hours to Alice. As she was eventually raised up she began coughing, desperately trying to rid herself of the stench of the garlic mayo, an impossible task given how much of it had already entered her nose. As this was happening, Alice hadn't noticed the stagehands removing this tank and replacing it with the cheese sauce tank in a much more rapid fashion than the previous tanks. The audience assumed this was just to rid everyone of the smell, however it quickly became apparent this was not why. As Alice was being raised up, still in her sauce based hell, wet, cold, uncomfortable and now extremely foul smelling, she reached halfway on the column and to her shock began plummeting downwards again. She barely had time to think about how unfair it was that the show was not only dropping her in disgusting substances, but also playing mind games and dropping her when she least expected it, before she was once again submerged in a sauce, this time cheese. As she was raised up for a fourth time, she noted that this sauce had a different texture. Whereas the others dripped from her and were more wet, the cheese sauce seemed to stick to her and would fall off in larger strings rather than drips. Whether she preferred this or not she did not know, nor care at this point. She was utterly ruined both physically and mentally, and wanted nothing more than for this horrendous experience to be over.

Kelly watching on had conflicting emotions. Whilst she did feel bad for her daughter, who was clearly hating every minute of the experience and was being humiliated in front of the entire viewing public, she also knew that there was every chance it could have been her up there, and whilst she perhaps may have handled it better than her daughter, she knew it would still have been an extremely unpleasant experience.

Alice knew there was only one tank left, but also knew if was by far the worst. The stagehands had already wheeled in the 'Chip shop special' filled to the brim with baked beans, curry sauce, gravy and mushy peas, in an orange, yellow, brown and green amalgamation of sloppiness. Alice felt herself reach the top and expected the drop but nothing came. She waited a few more seconds, still expecting the drop and not wanting to fall for the previous tricks. She continued this until eventually she slightly relaxed her face, the moment the producer operating the machine was clearly waiting for, as she was plunged downwards once again, this time into a thick morass of nastiness. Whereas being inside the other tanks had been horrible for Alice, particularly the garlic mayo tank, this one was unbearable. Not only was she contending with the revolting stench of all four horrible ingredients being mixed together, but the texture was unlike any of the others. This tank was far thicker than the others, and began to not only soak her through, but also stick to her skin. As well as this, the beans and peas had begun invading every nook and cranny of the destroyed young woman, invading her toes, her hair and most unwantedly from Alice's perspective, her underwear. She began to slowly rise up out of the tank, a quivering wreck covered in the variety of coloured sauces matching the tank below her. Now feeling more uncomfortable than ever due to the beans and mushy peas, she did at least take some solace in the fact that it was now over. The producers had one more cruel trick however, as when she reached the halfway point of the column, it dropped once again, plunging her into the depths of yet more misery. This time they even held her under for five seconds, prolonging her agony before finally raising her up to just above the surface of the tank. She sat there, beans, peas, gravy and curry sauce running down her ruined hair and face, invading her underwear and dripping down her legs back into the tank below, still blowing its pungent aroma into the young woman's nostrils. She was utterly defeated.
The judge and Kelly walked over to where the dejected looking Alice was uncomfortably sat. The judge then began to speak;

"Well, that was really something, a quite spectacular punishment for Alice. Lets see what she has to say about it. Alice, do you feel justice was done today?"

Alice didn't even speak to respond to the judge, merely giving a meek shake of her head.

"Alice clearly doesn't think justice has been done," said the judge. "But what about you Kelly" he continued, turning to face Alice's mum.

"Well, whilst the punishment may have been a little on the harsh side, I think Alice will come out of this a better person, and certainly deserved some punishment for trying to blame everything on me." Kelly responded.

"Very diplomatic" said the judge. "That is all we have time for on today's show, but make sure to join us next time where we will have two more people vying to convince our jury that it is the other who is deserving of punishment. And remember, on this occasion, if you can't take the grime, DON'T WASTE COURT TIME!