Bridezilla vs. Momzilla

When we last left Darcie, she, Beth and Debbie were helping Olivia teach her sister a wet and messy lesson about being a bridezilla

Sylvia threw her head back and groaned, Argh! but trudged right back to the slime machine and took her seat. Acting as Trent's proxy, Olivia took the rope from Debbie and slowly pulled it to tip the next bucket over. Thick chocolate poured from the bucket and rolled over Sylvia's head and down her body. Understanding that at this point defiance was no use, Sylvia leaned her head back and let the luscious chocolate roll over her face.

We were all fixed on watching Sylvia take her punishment and no one noticed the door to the banquet room open. What the hell are you two doing? said the party's newcomer, a rather plainly-dressed middle-aged woman. She wore a sweater over a polo shirt with a long denim skirt, knee socks and Birkenstocks a warm outfit for Texas in early-September. Her hair was gray and she wore it in a no-nonsense fashion, down and under a barrette, stopping at her shoulders. She wore no makeup, and at the risk of sounding cruel, she should have. She was probably my mother's age, but where Mom looks fifteen years younger, she looked ten years older. This had to be Nancy, Olivia and Sylvia's mother the militant feminist. Now I'd never met her and neither had Beth nor Debbie, but by the Ooooo! that fell over the guests who had been watching Sylvia get what was coming to her, most everyone else had and knew what her reaction would be. Olivia had warned us to think about the way she was when we first met her only ten times worse.

Mom, it was just a little game, Olivia began.

Little game? Nancy bellowed as she started for the front of the room where we were set up. You're making a fool of your sister! Is this what that little submissive tramp from Dallas taught you, how to humiliate yourself in front of people?

Well those were certainly fightin' words, but a glance at Jim who puckered out his lips and shook his head No lightly made me hold my tongue. I'm glad I did because what happened put her in her place a lot better than anything I could have said.

Olivia turned and started toward Nancy with a finger up. Mom! How dare you talk about my friend that way! Darcie is my age and has forgotten more about what it takes to have a happy marriage than you've ever known!

You know how I feel about the changes you've made in yourself, Nancy said. You were always the sensible one and now you're worse than her! She made that last comment pointing at the trashed Sylvia who came up out of the slime machine. Nancy started toward her with Olivia whirling around and keeping right up with her and they all ended up in front of the pie table.

Who the hell are you to say what's sensible and what's not? Sylvia asked. If you knew anything about what's sensible, Dad would still be here.

Olivia had told me how their father hadn't spoken to their mother in years. Like Olivia's wedding, he agreed to come to the rehearsal dinner and the ceremony to give Sylvia away but would not be seated with their mother there or at the reception.

Why are you bringing him up? Nancy demanded. Jim, Steven and Robert were all turning the cameras to get this from three different angles. It was your father's Neanderthal ways that broke us up!

It was hard not to laugh at Sylvia working herself up into a rage, dripping slime and chocolate everywhere. She was so mad she'd forgotten her appearance. No, Mom! Dad left because you were mean to him all the time! Olivia may be wilder than me now, but you know what? She and Jared get along now! And you know why that is? It's because she lets him do this to her!

Sylvia swept a pie from the table and swung it around by the edge of the plate. I thought sure it was going straight into Nancy's face but she came all the way around and caught Olivia completely off guard. The plain white Kool Whip plastered her unsuspecting sister and exploded up into her hair, onto the halter top of her mini-dress and over her mostly-bare cleavage. Poor Liv was stunned for a second, but she'd graduated from the Darcie Sutton School of Being a Good Sport and as soon as the shock wore off, about as long as it took for Sylvia to drop the plate from her face, her mouth fell open and a cackling, visceral laughter came out.

Nancy was temporarily stunned to silence. Sylvia continued to attack. You know what else? she yelled. Handing her plastered sister a pie, she said, I think I'll let Trent do it too!

Splat! Liv decked her sister's face with the plain white pie. Nancy stood there with her mouth gaping open. None of the other guests even uttered a sound. Even I was stunned. We were all mesmerized by the exchange.

Both women wiped their faces. Sylvia grabbed a pie in each hand and slipped one to Olivia with a sneering smile. How does it feel, Mom? How does it feel for the big feminist to have two daughters who want to be big goofballs for their men?

Splat! Sylvia and Olivia shoved the blue-tinted and pink-tinted pies into each other's faces simultaneously. Nancy was beginning to babble, I-I-ah-I watching them.

They shoved simultaneous pies into their faces again. I was beginning to wonder if they had something like this planned. Olivia told us to make way more pies than we needed even if Sylvia had spun Pie on every round.

Armed again, Olivia tormented their mother this time. Doesn't it just kill you knowing your daughters are willing to act like fools just to keep their men happy? Still holding her pie, Olivia spun around and wiggled her ass at her sister who promptly smashed a yellow-tinted pie into it and smeared it around. She and Sylvia whirled around at the same time and Olivia delivered her orange-tinted pie to the same target on Sylvia except Sylvia's lacey skirt was already riding up a little. Olivia pulled it and the little train up out of the way and smashed her pie into Sylvia's soaking wet, and not so opaque, white bikini panties. They both faced each other and laughed.

I've seen enough! their mother yelled, finally collecting her wits again. I'm not staying here any longer while you two act like a couple of circus clowns!

We're sorry to see you leave, Mom, Sylvia said, passing a purple-tinted pie to Olivia and keeping a green one for herself.

Olivia gave her a knowing glance and added, Right, Mom. You didn't even stay long enough to get your party favors. HERE!

If Nancy hadn't been such an uptight feminist, she might have seen a Three Stooges short and known that you never stand that close to two people wielding pie, especially if you're going to argue with them. From each side, Olivia and Sylvia slammed the pies they were holding into Nancy's face, sandwiching her entire head and making it vanish into a glob of purple and green-colored Kool Whip. Nancy was stunned once again, this time by the disbelief that her daughters would attack her this way. She didn't even have the wits to even throw up her hands and deflect the pies. She just stood there and got slammed like I would have. Although I'm betting it didn't give her the reaction it would have given me! Liv and Sylvia rubbed the pies around to get all of her gray hair good and gloppy and then dropped the plates. Nancy wobbled unsteadily.

Both sisters must have realized at the same time that they would never get another opportunity like this. Olivia pinned their mother's hands behind her back and started to drag her toward and slime machine. Sylvia grabbed the rope to advance the buckets and then the one to dump. Olivia maneuvered her mother in front of the seat and forced her to sit. Blinded by pie, Nancy was powerless to do otherwise.

Sylvia pulled the dump rope and just as Nancy found it in her to protest with, What the hell is going on? purple chunky Nick slime, full of oatmeal goodness impacted the top of her head and started to makes its way down. Olivia got her share of it too. It splattered into her face from the top of Nancy's head, but Olivia was too destroyed already to care. While Nancy screamed, Olivia laughed, stopping only to spit the slime out that was splattering into her open mouth.

Everyone else was laughing too. I know Ashley's Pete has an issue with people who aren't willing victims getting singled out, and usually I wouldn't take so much glee from it happening myself, but you have to admit that someone as controlling as Nancy obviously was, who wanted nothing more than to make sure Olivia and Sylvia were just like her, getting her messy comeuppance was hilarious.

When the purple slime stopped flowing, Olivia rushed around and plopped into her mother's lap and pinned her to the chair. Damn it! Get off me! Nancy screeched.

Sock it to me! Olivia said with her hands over her head and her face looking up to the buckets above. Even though she got the catch phrase wrong, (Everyone knows you say, I don't know, to get slimed. Sock it to me, is to get drenched!), Sylvia advanced the buckets again and dumped creamy yellow slime over the both of them.

Ahhhh! Glub, glub, Olivia said, first enjoying the slime rolling over her face and obscuring it and then reacting to it filling her open mouth.

Liv was in heaven, and while I don't know about Beth or Debbie, I really wanted to jump in there myself. However this was more therapeutic for Liv and Sylvia than anything else.

LET ME UP, YOU UNGRATEFUL BITCH! Nancy screamed. I think it shocked Olivia that her mother would talk to her that way. She started to get up, but Sylvia must have thought that shouldn't go unpunished. She rushed to the pie table and grabbed two white ones and then back to the slime machine.

Nancy was just standing up and trying to wipe her eyes when Sylvia brought both pies up and asked, Now is that any way to talk to your first-born daughter? and slammed another sandwich around Nancy's head. Sylvia dropped the plates and just stood there staring at her with her arms folded across her messy chest. Nancy made eye contact with her and everyone could tell she was seething with rage. Get out of my party, Sylvia commanded.

Nancy started to speak but closed her mouth and turned toward the door. Olivia picked up a pink-tinted pie and said, Here's something so you'll know I'm not so ungrateful, and hurled the pie at her. With accuracy that gave away the fact that she and Jared must get plenty of practice, the pie found its mark and plastered Nancy in her well-slimed ass. She didn't even flinch. Amidst the party guests' laugher, she walked out the emergency exit next to the loading door.

I think that about does it for the party, Sylvia said.

Don't forget your gift bags! Olivia added, garnering one last laughter outburst at her still being the gracious host in her totally trashed state.

Once everyone had said their goodbye's and left, I asked Sylvia, Aren't you worried that your mom won't come to the wedding now?

Oh, she's gonna be pissed for a good long time, but she won't miss the wedding, Sylvia replied. There's no way in hell she's going to let my dad be the only one of them there.

Just then, Jared brought Trent into the room. What the fuck happened here, World War Three? Jared asked.

No, sweetie, Olivia replied, planting a messy kiss on her one and only. We just let Mom know in no uncertain terms that we no longer share her outlook on life, men and how to hang onto them. What are you doing here?

Strippers and stag films get old after a while, Trent said. Jared said we'd probably enjoy ourselves more crashing this party since you were in charge of it and had invited your friends to help. He told me not to be surprised to find a scene like this one!

Sylvia turned to me, being earnest, but it was hard to take her seriously with her hair slicked down with pie and slime and not a thread of her bride's costume that wasn't smeared with some sweet glop. She said, I've needed to have it out with our mother for a long time and Olivia really needed to let her know that the way she brought us up wasn't going to be for her anymore either. I'd give you a hug if I weren't such a messy wreck!

I was about to say, Aw, go ahead, since I'd wanted to get messy ever since the feud broke out. But before I could do that, from behind me I heard, Don't let that stop you!

Splat! The lights went out thanks to that Damn Yankee covering my head in a messy pie sandwich. I screeched and then heard him laughing and I could envision him doubled over. Well, at least I got my wish. I wiped my eyes clear and turned to give him a comical scowl and growl. Then I noticed that Robert and Steven had used the moment to give Debbie and Beth the same treatment. Blue and orange pie dripped onto my pink satiny mini-dress and I turned back around to look at Sylvia who was looking at me in shock. I threw my arms open wide and said, I guess he's right!

We wrapped our arms around each other giggling and Beth, Debbie and I took turns hugging Sylvia and Liv until we were all totally wrecked. Now be truthful! Did any of you think when I described our smokin' hot dresses that any of us were going to come out of this story clean?

Now Debbie's not usually the instigator of mischief. That's usually my job, but once the hugging was done she pointed at the guys and asked, Now, are we just going to stand her and let them get away with trashing our hot little dresses?

And with that the mother of all pie fights took advantage of the fact that Olivia had us make so many pies. I don't know if she had something like this in mind, but I don't care because we had a blast! Girls plastered guys. Guys plastered girls. Girls plastered girls and we didn't stop until we'd run out and every square inch on every one of us was completely covered in gooey glop just the way I like it! I'd give a blow-by-blow, I want to tell you about what happened next.

The pies were gone and all five couples were on the floor, making out after wrestling with each other in the glop. Jim's cock was bulging through his slimy cargo shorts and I was getting to the point that I couldn't stand not wrapping my lips around it as he rubbed my messy bare back from my shoulders down to where my tattoo peeked out from under the dress.

Then I heard Beth's voice: Just to be clear, are we headed for one of those 'sworn to secrecy' moments?

If you don't know what she's talking about, read Darcie's Uniform Destruction where she and I ended up naked underneath Steven and Jim, (respectively of course) after a bra and panties match in cooking oil.

It's pretty obvious that our minds run the same way. I poked my tongue into my cheek for that universal sign that guys love and winked at Jim and then said, Sounds fine to me!

I'm in, Debbie announced.

I thought no one would ever ask, Olivia chimed in.

It's my party and I'll blow if I want to! Sylvia said.

Now some of you might wonder why what is about to happen happens after the take my medicine stories, but understand that was a different situation. Jim's here and everything I'm about to do is for him. He told me if he'd ever known that Pete was going to react the way he did about him punishing me, he would have just confronted me at home and we'd have done something there that would not have ended up on the pages here. Jim just wanted confirmation that he was my alpha male and was allowed to get away with whatever he wanted.

I mean seriously! What girl wouldn't love to have an outfit she'd just bought wrecked with water and pies and then have it ripped to shreds, forcing her to walk to the car naked the next day, but not before her body is violated several times? I polled Beth, Debbie, Olivia and even Ashley, (Pay attention, Pete!), and we all think that sounds like a perfect night on the town! Punishment my ass!

Anyway, except for Sylvia and Trent, we'd all seen each other naked just a couple of months ago at our little skinny dipping cast party for Olivia's video, so this was going to be among friends anyway.

There were five buckets left hanging in the slime machine so while we women locked all of the doors and each found a chair, the men each got one down. Each couple staked out a corner of the room. Trent and Sylvia pulled the partition out slightly to create another corner so all five couples had a little semi-private spot. We put the chairs down with the backs to the corners. We women had conspired together and made our guys all strip out of their gloppy clothes down to their underwear. We weren't the only ones conspiring together. After stripping down, the guys all pulled us up close into a passionate kiss. I felt Jim pulling the ties of my halter out of their bow and giggled as he pulled them and the front of my dress down to expose my tits. Then he pulled the top all the way down to my waist before yanking my skirt up to my waist, essentially leaving me in my g-string with a thick belt on. Beth, Debbie and Olivia all looked the same way when I glanced around and Trent had removed Sylvia's bride costume completely and was working on undoing her bra.

Wait! (Sound of needle scratching across record is inserted in the Books on CD version.) Didn't I say something about keeping our clothes on earlier? Well, what the hell!

Jim sat in the chair and I stooped down in front of him. I sort of puffed up my chest to offer my tits to him for a squeeze and he took full advantage before I pulled his erect cock out and gave it a couple of messy strokes and went right down on it, all the wa-a-a-ay down!

Oh, shit! That's just right! Jim murmured as I slid my lips, tongue and the roof of my mouth up and down the entire length of his shaft. Yes! I'm a deep throat now and proud of it! I bet Nancy never had a dick in her mouth in her entire life, let alone one shoved all the way back tickling her throat! Uptight bitches just don't know what they're missing!

My pussy needed attention. I tried shoving the g-string aside, but that wasn't good enough. Without taking Jim's dick out of my mouth, I rose up into a bent over standing position and pulled the g-string down my legs and kicked it off. Then I went back to my stooping position and kept hold of Jim with one hand and fingered myself with the other. Too bad Mr. Chubby was home in my nightstand drawer.

Great minds think alike because the room began to fill with the satisfied moans of men getting their brains blown out and women pleasuring themselves. I heard one of the guys grunting, and the sound of slime being poured over his lady's head as he shot his wad in her mouth. Well why did you think we gave them the buckets of slime?

Jim was doing his best to hold out, knowing that I would like to go over the top with him. I gave him a little moan to let him know I was ready and he relaxed. I picked up the pace and Jim picked up the bucket! I started to cum and just after I felt the first drops of creamy blue slime start to cover my naked body, I felt the first warm drops of Jim's jizz start to feed me. Have I ever mentioned that I just love giving him head? I've never done it in the car though. Next time we're on a long trip, just the two of us, watch out!

I finished myself. The slime bucket was empty and I sucked the last drop of man juice from Jim's member before letting him watch me swallow it. (Hey! I like swallowing. He may as well enjoy it too!) I lay my head in his lap, with his cock still protruding from his fly and nuzzled against my cheek while Jim ran his fingers through my thoroughly pie and slime-matted hair. We stayed that way until everyone was done.

Jared broke the tense silence cracking all of us up when he said, See, Trent? I told you we'd have more fun if we came here!

We got dressed again and rinsed the glop from our clothes by each couple taking a turn on the dunk tank letting the other four couples have a bucket of five balls to dunk them at extreme close range. (Try six inches back!) It didn't do a very good job because the water was a gray cloud by the time we were done so we all got hosed off outside behind the building. We drained the dunk tank and left it to be picked up, took down the slime machine and cleaned up our mess inside, (as usual requiring all of us to get another hose down). It was late and a little chilly getting hosed outside. Daytime in September was fine for swimming, but the evening air could bite a little when you're all wet. Of course the fact that four out of the five of us were in tight dresses that didn't accommodate a bra was not lost on the guys who made sure we got more than our fair share of water in the chilly night air. Oh well! Haven't I said before that boys will be boys? (Jim got a close up of my nipples sticking out that is most definitely NOT on You Tube and better never be!)

We all gave Sylvia and Olivia wet hugs and pulling the U-Haul behind us, Jim led the convoy of us, Beth and Steven and Robert and Debbie back to our motel. Lucky thing we were able to check in earlier since we were all wrecks now. We girls could have changed before leaving the club, but it just wouldn't have been right for us to be clean and dry with our sweet guys still all wet and pie-stained. Besides, if I hadn't left my destroyed dress on, what was Jim going to rip to shreds after I led him straight into the shower? I let him play with whatever he wanted and afterward, he swept me up and carried me to bed as soon as I had dried off with a towel.

I brought a skimpy nightgown, but didn't really need it. Not when Little Jim had fully recovered from his time down my throat and was more than ready for his regular swim in Sweetwater Lake. Besides it's more fun to be naked next to Jim in bed and play, What's he going to fondle next? He always surprises me!