Part Four.

"So you see, I need you to arrange the flowers for the tables" Aunt Mimi said, perched on the end of the chaise lounge. I sat opposite, trying to look interested.

"And you will need supervise the delivery of the wine and beer for the adults. We have the cordial for the young ones coming tomorrow. The food for the children is coming on the morning of," she chirped away, picking invisible lint off her blue summer dress. Her curly black hair bobbed as she counted off her checklist on her fingers, "Flowers, alcohol, cordial, food, the Punch and Judy tent is arriving tomorrow, the hay bales for seating coming Friday. Farmer Gibson will be bringing them on his tractor trailer"

She bolted upright. "Gosh, we've not thought about the canapes! Fiona was supposed to be supplying them but since her mother went into hospital. Oh damn and bother! Just when I thought we had everything under control!"

"It'll be fine Aunt Mimi, it will be fine. People don't expect"

"Well, I expect!" She snapped.

"I'll ask Mrs Baker if she'd oblige. The ones she did for Miss Fairweather's wedding were scrumptious" I placated

"Oh, would you, how kind!" She trilled, then leaned forward conspiratorially, her voice lower, "and none of their kind, remember".
She slid her eyes sideways towards the scullery, where she had passed Klaus on the way in, elbow deep in potato peelings, his contribution to preparing some of the food for the fair.

Holding my tongue, "Perish the thought Aunt Mimi"

"It's bad enough they are here at all let alone them being at the fair" she said sniffily, wiping more invisible not existent dirt from her dress

"Keep your voice down, do" I chided. The walls were thin. Klaus could hear every word no doubt.

"I shall do no such thing" she spat back, raising her voice louder, "It's about time we sent the rats back to the lair!"

She paused, indignantly staring at the door to the scullery, daring Klaus to enter. When he chose not to reply, she slumped a little lower in her seat, "Oh Eric! Why defend them? The trouble they bring, the things they did to those poor people"
She trailed off, shaking her head, staying silent for a few seconds.

Instantly, brighter, "I hear Mrs Galbraith is bringing her daughter Audrey to the fair. You two would make a lovely couple"

I nodded, forcing a smile, "oh really?" The manufactured interest well practised, off pat. One became adept at feigning curiosity.

"Oh yes, you must meet her, she's a devil on the hockey pitch, and a whizz in the kitchen so I hear. She takes very much after her mother. She will be very much in demand."

Mimi winked at me coquettishly and I returned it with a smile, "well I shall have to be sure to make an impression" I said confidently.

"Jolly good! Well I must dash, I promised Captain Bannister we would go through the parlour games he needed to arrange"

She practically jumped to her feet and left the parlour and went through into the scullery. Without even acknowledging Klaus she swung open the scullery door and turned in the doorway to face me, "And remember her name is Audrey. Be sure to put on your best suit"

"I will, I will" I confirmed, ushering out into the sunlight, "well goodbye Aunt Mimi"

I closed the door and leant my back against it, letting out a long sigh

Klaus looked up from his peelings, "In Germany we would say she is as annoying as the fly around the cows ass!"

I roared with laughter, "how succinct"


***********

The week passed quickly, I worked at the bank until four, then rushed back to the estate to carry on the preparations.
Klaus and I were hoisting the temporary bandstand roof over its circular base. It stood a few feet above ground level, with ivy wrapped columns supporting the conical roof. We both glistened with sweat as we heaved and pushed, pulled and fastened the fabric roof over the performance area. Finally secured in place we sat on the side steps, under the roofs shade, dabbing foreheads with handkerchiefs when we saw Aunt Mimi crossing the lawn. The smile of satisfaction faded as she saw Klaus, sat to my left, sun browned legs in sports shorts stretched out before him.
Her eyes flicked from me to Klaus and back again, the content smile becoming a hard line of scorn.

"I told you Eric, certain people" she slid her gaze to Klaus and back to me, "are not welcome at the fair"

I bristled, "Yes Aunt Mimi, you have repeatedly said this"

"Then, in that case, what is he doing here?" She emphasised the 'he' and shot a look at Klaus, so scornful, it caused Klaus to drop his gaze to the floor. He reminded silent, but I could feel him rippling.

"The fair doesn't start until Saturday, he was merely helping me set the bandstand up" I said evenly. My heart raced and I yearned to yell at the insufferable woman. Keeping it in I managed a smile, "we should be thanking him for his help"

"Thank him indeed" she scoffed, then laughed mockingly, "these people do not require our thanks, they should be thanking us for not treating them as they did the poor people they tried to exterminate!"

I felt Klaus move, a small shift of his leg the first tremor before the dam was likely to burst.

Aunt Mimi blundered on, emboldened as she warmed to her tirade, "We showed their kind how much better a nation we are, more compassionate, more humble, more magnanimous, yet they still feel they can do as they please and enter places I have expressly told them they were not welcome!"

Fearing that Klaus would be unable to hold his tongue, I jumped to my feet, "Aunt Mimi, we should really show Klaus how tolerant we are as a nation. Come, let's walk and inspect the table settings" I said, reaching for her elbow trying to guide her away from the bandstand.
She pulled her arm away before I could guide her away. Her face flashed a brief anger, like a spark igniting, "I shall do no such thing! Please tell our guest, ", she sneered that word, "is longer required, the bandstand looks perfectly acceptable . We no longer need him"

The smile was thin, never reaching the rest of her, "in fact we won't need their kind here at all, I shall tell the same to the commander tomorrow at the fair. Perhaps we can get them moved to another town before they return to the continent"

I fought the urge to scream at her again. Her bloody mindedness could ruin my carefully nurtured and disguised existence with a man that had transformed my feelings in a few short months. Aware that I was in love with a man, forbidden by his sex and his nationality I was trapped, unable to fight or to reason an argument. I sighed defeatedly, "I'm sure the commander will be very interested in your point of view" was the best I could muster. I turned back to Klaus. We both knew what this could mean.

*************

Klaus seemed quiet that night, the steady drip of bile from Aunt and the community as a whole had started to wear him down. We sat chewing our pork chop mostly in silence. My attempts to strike up a conversation were met with terse answers. Even the sure fire conversation starters, Chopin, Straus, Stravinsky failed to ignite anything other than brief conversation before it withered and died.

Washing the dishes in the sink, I turned to Klaus's, handing him a plate.

"Do you think your Aunt was serious when she said she'd speak to the commander" he asked drying the tableware with a cloth.

"Oh I'm sure she's serious" I replied placing cutlery on the side of sink, where Klaus's picked up each utensil, drying carefully, "I think she overestimates her sway somewhat though".

"Her sway?" Klaus said, "I don't understand"

His vocabulary had come on in spades during his time with me, his appetite for words, close but not exceeding his appetite for me. Some phrases still puzzled him though. I took a second to order my thoughts.

"Yes, imagine your Generals being approached by, oh let me think, a watch maker, who thought his advice would be welcomed by them. The watchmaker would tell them how to run the war, and expect his words to carry weight"

"I see" said Klaus, "I understand, although I think I would have preferred to listen to a watchmaker over my leaders, the last few years"

He smiled at his joke, as did I. I patted his shoulder affectionately as he finished the last couple of cups, and we settled down for an evening in front of the radio.

The following day, the eve of the fair, I rushed back from the bank, changed into old dirty clothes and headed back to the estate, to put the final touches to the preparations. I left Klaus back at the lodge, I couldn't face another argument with Aunt Mimi. It meant more work for me without Klaus to lend his skills, but needs must.
The flagpoles were up, bunting strung between each, the paper decorations rustling in the wind, flapping energetically. In the centre of the lawn stood the bandstand, festooned by flowers. At the far end, the Punch and Judy tent, deckchairs in front of it, ready and waiting for the excited audience. Beyond that the summerhouse, on the lake side, gaily decorated in bunting, the tables inside bursting with flowers, ready to accept the food for the children's party for after the Punch and Judy show.

Aunt Mimi was on the bandstand, checking off notes on a clipboard, flourishing off each point with a satisfied tick.

"Eric, I have a few things for you to do. We are mostly finished, but I have prepared a small list of jobs you can do this afternoon". She flicked through the papers on her clip board and handed me a sheet of paper ripped from a notebook. Several jobs were listed and I ran my eye down them as she twittered on, "tomorrow I want you to keep an eye out for the Maloney brothers. The scoundrels will be up to no good and I need you to make sure they are kept on a tight leash should they attend"

I was half listening as I mentally ordered her list of jobs and the best order to complete them.

"Since they lost their parents to those frightful Germans, they have gone right off the rails. Poor things, one can hardly blame them, of course but we don't want them ruining the day with their shenanigans"

Making sure I was nodding in the right places, she flowed on, relentless, "And don't forget Audrey will be attending, I do wish you'd make an effort to woo her, Eric. She'd be such a catch"

Inwardly I cringed, but outwardly I created a demeanour that I hoped conveyed agreement.

"Oh and talking of the Maloneys being unwanted guests, I spoke to the commander earlier"

Suddenly I was alert, the mention of the commander and her threats to encourage the POWs to be moved on, sharpening my attention.

"It appears I need not encourage the relocation of our, our" she struggled for wording, " barbarous guests, as plans are already afoot to move them to Salisbury"

She brightened, a smile of glee lighting up her entire face, "They shall be out of our hair shortly. How splendid!"

Thrusting the list of my jobs into my pocket, my heart sinking low in my chest, I turned away from my Aunt, "well I can't stand here all day chatting" I said as brightly as I could, "these jobs won't do themselves" and set off for the summerhouse where I needed to nail up the bunting that Aunt Mimi had noticed had fallen. My heart hammered in my chest as I left her, my mind reeling.


That evening it was my turn to be sullen over dinner. Klaus had prepared a stew with a rabbit he had snared and we sat in silence, both pretending to listen to the World Service broadcast as we mopped up the gravy with hunks of bread.

"You quiet tonight" Klaus eventually said, finishing off the last piece of bread. He licked specks of gravy from his fingers.

"Aunt Mimi ran me ragged this afternoon" I said, adding, "which means she had me doing a lot of jobs. No time to rest" I explained, aware by now I often had to explain some phrases.

Picking up the dirty plates, Klaus headed to the sink, "She certainly likes to get what she wants"

Silently, I could only agree, and joined him at the sink to wash the dishes.


*****************

The next day, the day of the fair, Aunt Mimi was driving me to distraction, barking final orders to the gardeners, the cleaners, the catering staff, and myself. I saw her berating old Ned, the grounds man, admonishing him on this and that. He kept his eyes down, concentrating on his tasks. A train of catering staff flitted from the kitchens to the summerhouse laden with the food for the children's party. Jelly, trifles, cakes, trays of sandwiches and canapés marched in convoy across the grass. Aunt Mimi stood guard, nodding shallowly as each member of the kitchen staff filtered by, tray after tray of food. Despite our differences I had to marvel at how she had managed this during rationing. Day to day there was barely enough to survive but suddenly all was bountiful. The wry smile of self congratulation spread across her face.

Once everything was set, we were all relieved from our duties and sent home to freshen up for the start of the fair at twelve prompt. I trudged back to the lodge, heavy hearted and downcast at the prospect of my days with Klaus bring numbered. I hadn't the heart to tell him the previous evening, I felt it better to not bring it up in conversation. I still clung to the hope, no matter how slim, that Aunt Mimi had embellished the commanders words and Klaus was safe for now. As such I would not tell him until something was set in stone. I would carry this weight, heavy around my shoulders, at least until I had to share the news.
I tried to imagine life without him as I wandered back, each step closer to him yet also closer to the moment he would be resettled in Salisbury or God knows where. In the few short months he had become a part of me, as close and important as any family member. I corrected myself, as I rounded the bend in the path, that led to the lodge, he was more important. I had never felt like this before, that alien feeling so unusual and elusive until tasted, and then unable to envision a life without it. This was what the books meant by love. All the words in the world could not pay justice to how it raised one's heart, making it sing and soar, and then crushing blackness when the threat emerged to take it away.

Klaus was stood at the chopping block, one foot raised on the tree stump, the axe handle resting in his hands with the axe head on the ground beneath, chopped pieces of wood scattered around him, as he talked to two young youths, one taller than the other but similar in hair and build. I guessed brothers, the Maloney brothers, as I hurriedly paced over to them. Klaus's mouth seemed set in a fixed attempt at a placating smile, entirely false as he stood still. I could see the youths, animated, fingers stabbing in the Germans direction as they bobbed their heads, wide mouthed, shouting and laughing. It was obvious the confrontation had not just started.

"Dirty German filth!" The elder cried, pointing a stubby finger towards Klaus, "go home, we don't want you here!"

"You should all be hung!" The younger piped up, his voice raised in a pre pubescent shrill.

The older one joined in, "From gallows this high" he shouted, raising one hand, palm flat to a height above his own shoulder, in a mock German salute.

Not sure what the relevance was of the raised hand the younger one joined in with his brothers mocking laugh, raising his own hand high, even if he did look puzzled at what he was doing. It seemed cruel, even if he had no idea what he was referencing. Klaus stood still, his face frozen in shock, the smile he had attempted to diffuse the situation useless yet still adorning his face. Confusion and fear swept the rest of him. Like all of us ex soldiers we had seen countless horrific sights, the trauma of war deeply ingrained, but faced by two peacocking youths, Klaus was immobile.

I quickened my pace further and the two youths spun around, surprised at the appearance of another adult. They took to their heels, dashing up and over the wall. The older boy picked up a stone and launched it towards Klaus.

"Bastard" he cried as the stone left his fist. I saw it whizz towards Klaus, tumbling in flight. It hit him on his temple, just above his eye, and Klaus's hand instinctively went to his head. His hand came away, sticky, red. Still, he made no response, no cry or shout as they scurried away.

"Good shot!" The smaller boy enthused, scampering behind his older brother.

I yelled, no idea if they were words, probably just a guttural roar of rage and started after them.

"Don't!" Klaus shouted, stopping me in my tracks. The chase aborted before it had truly begun I went to Klaus's side, fishing a handkerchief from my pocket to dab away the blood.

"It's fine," said Klaus quietly, "it's only a small cut". He eyed the retreating children, laughing, mocking him

"It is not damn well fine" I said angrily, my stabbing words at odds with my gentle wiping away of the blood.

"I've had enough of them, enough of Aunt Mimi, enough of people treating you like you are scum," my anger rising now, words chopped, spilling from me like the missiles from the guns I once loaded, "and I will NOT take this anymore"

It was my turn to spin on my heels and I marched away, back towards the fair. Klaus ran to catch up, trying to tug at my blazer, "where are you going?" He asked. I knocked his hand away, determinedly striding on. Klaus kept up, "Eric calm down! What are you going to do?"

"Something I should have done earlier" I said defiantly

"I come with you"

"No Klaus go back, you don't want to get into more trouble"

"Eric, where you go I go"

I marched on, towards the fair, my hands balled into fists.

***********

When I got to the bandstand the area was deserted. Now that all the jobs were complete all staff were either preparing to attend the fair or take some well deserved time off. Klaus was keeping up with me, still holding the handkerchief to his forehead. Blood has soaked through and a small trickle had run down the side of his face, like a single red tear.

Striding over to the bandstand I ripped the flowers roughly from its edge and threw them into the band area at is centre, petals fluttering down like confetti. I tugged at a gay string of bunting at its roof, pulling it down. The momentum dislodged the next tethering further along and that detached from his moorings with a snap. I yanked again, harder and the next securing hook popped. More bunting fell around me. Klaus stood, frozen, witness to my anger as it seeped out. I threw it to the ground and turned. The Punch and Judy tent stood at the far side of the lawn, and I marched over. I heaved my weight against the side and it lifted up, raising at an angle before gravity took over and it fell with a crash. I heard fabric rip and wood crack as it fell. I stood panting slowly, my hands on hips.
I saw the summerhouse on the lakeside. I strode over, Klaus at my heels and flung the door open. It banged hard against the wall, and I walked in, Klaus behind me.
Three rows of tables lay in front of where I stood, with more tables laden with food all along the back wall. Many trays had tea towels covering them, but I could see the layout, savoury sandwiches and canapes towards the left, the sweet items, trifles, cakes, sauces on the right. Between them pitchers of cordial already pre prepared.

Making my way between the rows of tables, laid with plates and cutlery, folded napkins tented at each placement I reached the table holding the sandwiches. I gripped the edge of the table top and heaved it up violently. Sandwiches flew, bread separating from fillings, some splattering against the wall, making a languid journey down, most landing in a heaving mess as I upended the table. I had let out a cry as I hefted it over and felt an enormous satisfaction as it tumbled to the floor. I kicked it aside and moved right. I picked up a pitcher of cordial in each hand and flung it against the wall. The Bakelite pitchers cracked on impact and fans of coloured cordial arced up the wall, creating a wild splattered pattern. I grabbed two more and they followed the first. My blazer was wet, I could feel it running down inside my sleeves as the cordial splashed back.

"That's enough now", Klaus shouted over my violence. He came to me and I pushed him away, reaching for two more plastic pitchers. I rained them down on the floor, violently, the liquid bouncing back up, covering my trousers and splashing Klaus who had retreated. He came towards me again, and I relented, entering his outstretched arms. We stood silent, embracing, my anger part sated by the violence. We turned to walk away, Klaus's footing slid from under him on the slippery floor and he pulled me down with him, landing, splashing in the pool of cordial.

"If this were France, and this was mud," he said splashing his hand through the cordial, "it would be like old times!"

I could see the flash of merriment in him now, an echo of the day in France,

you are hard!..

what was once a rifle is now a pistol.

..bird

cloud


I laughed, and Klaus joined me, his head back, roaring. If he was standing, one hand would surely be on his knee and he'd be bent over, laughing.

I pulled him to me and he pushed me back, and we fell, my back sopping wet, hard against the floor, shirt sticking. We rolled over, my roll gaining momentum, me on top straddling him. The room filled with our laughs. I was back in France, the war, the world, my life of frustration back in England a distant distraction as I discovered my feelings towards men. Klaus was back in his childlike state, despite the cut eye and the aging and distress of war, it had all dissolved in an instant, and he was twenty again, playing, losing himself.

We twisted and wrestled, legs wrapping around each other, bucking, wriggling, losing then gaining control. Rolling, fighting we hit the table leg and it buckled in, the cheap metal legs folding under the force of two men. Trifles and cakes slid onto us, one landing on my back, another flopping onto the back of my head. A huge, multi layered cake fell onto Klaus, his hair flattened by the weight of sponge, jam, and butter cream.

I picked up handfuls, driving it into Klaus's chest, coating his shirt, moving upwards, covering his face, rubbing it into his hair. He retaliated, bucking me off him. He scrambled on hands and knees, sliding around in the mess, pulling off the remaining jellies, cakes and trifles from the adjoining table that had not collapsed, throwing them in my direction. I dodged many, hit by many more. He seemed lost in the stupidity and surreality of what we were doing. I couldn't see as he was clothed, but I was positive he would be soft. As before, these events were not sexual, just a release of tensions built. We both needed that now, so on we fought, two old foes, trading guns and bullets for less harmful ammunition. Instead of screams from the battlefield, yelps of laughter and joy.

We lay panting, tired, and messy. In France we had washed and relaxed, drying in the sun. Today, we had to get out. Quickly. We left through the back of the summerhouse and dived fully clothed into the lake. The mess floating out around us as we splashed and swam back along the lake, past the mooring where he launched the boat, a few weeks before, and beyond, towards the lodge. We staggered out of the water and dripped our way back to the lodge.