There's clearly a divide between UK and USA wammers , but the biggest discrepancy seems to be in quality of pies. While Lisa and Leon at Mostwam have made huge strides in narrowing the gap, the simple fact remains that most European pies are lackluster: thin, runny cream usually without crust or tin.

An American banana, coconut, or chocolate cream pie is easily worth ten UK pies and is roughly commensurate with three South American game show pies.

Mathematical ruminations anyone?

To be perfectly honest, I would say that this also depends on what is your opinion of a good pie...
IMHO, the best custard pies (from a WAM perspective) are made from a pre-made flan case (spongier than a pastry case, but able to be held in a hand without a foil tin), filled to the brim with ice cold custard (Ambrosia custard in cartons which have been in the freezer about 10 hours so that they are still liquid but about to solidify, is my favourite) and topped with a layer of fridge-chilled "squirty cream" to ensure that the custard is hidden as a "nice" gooey extra-cold surprise for the girl as you splat it on her... :devil:

Therefore by my standards the best pies can easily be made in the UK!!!

However everyone has their own opinion, and I can see that those who like marshmallow-fluff pies will likely be disappointed in the UK...

The impression that I get is most british pies seem to be more along the lines of "flans". At least that's what I think their called.

If an American were to mimic what this style, I would image putting whipped cream on top of a pancake. That's not an exact duplication, mind you, but more like a reasonable facsimile.

As hard as a duplication of the american pie, since, as an american, I can't say what the British have available, I can't say how easily it would be to acquire the items used to make them, so it may be possible that the american, ubiquitous graham cracker crust is more of a boutique item in the UK, which comes with a boutique price.

I'd like to say that when it comes to graham cracker items, non-Americans are less familiar with the things you can do them than Americans are. I think I saw an episode of an Australian cooking channel on YouTube, and they made a s'more. They explained what a s'more was to those unfamiliar with it, while I would expect an american cooking channel, designed for an american audience, would expect the audience to know, because that's like explaining George Washington and the Cherry Tree.

Please note that this only based on my impression. I haven't done a systematic survey of British peoples and their familiarity with various american foods.

I think we need to organize a shipment of Coolwhip to our friends in the U.K. so they can try it. In return they can send us some women who like being pied, since there seem to be more of them across the pond.

Yes but you are keeping the recipe secret from us.

This all depends on what someone wants from a pie, and how they plan to use it. The closest to the American pies done by a UK producer is probably the stuff the Moomins use, but that is a closely guarded secret. TBH the thing I'm most curious about is whether it tastes as nice as it looks, as it looks as if it should be delicious!

We used to use custard flans here, flan bases filled with custard and then topped with squirty cream, though following both our girls' feedback and requests from custom purchasers we've now ditched the flan bases and gone to just using paper bowls instead. The paper bowls are just the right size to fit a model's face and hold half a can of runny custard each plus the squirty cream, which results in a nice satisfying splatter as they land, plus lots of nice gloopy mess to flow and drip all over the recipients clothes afterwards. We used these in our recent "schoolgirl pie fight" with Maude and Rosemary pieing the hell out of each other, and it seemed to work very well.

Link to thread for that scene:
https://umd.net/forums/schoolgirl-pie-fight-maude-and-rosemary

Example of the pies in action (there were 50 in total in this scene, they got 25 each):