I was talking to a friend of mine yesterday about the idea of spontaneous/unplanned kink experiences: connecting with someone in the moment (like at a bar or over casual conversation), finding out you're both "into" the same kink, and then having a spontaneous session with one another.
Yes, both of us know that there are several safety considerations involved for anything like that.
That said, just curious if that's ever actually happened to anyone on here - and would love to hear about it if it has.
I had a partner who I had just tried to explain my like for wam. One day I was relaxing on the sofa and he randomly started smearing peanut butter and chocolate spread in my hair. It was a complete surprise but felt amazing
More of a missed opportunity than an unplanned/spontaneous experience
Back in college I had a retail job in the local mall. One particularly slow afternoon I was minding the store by myself. The store was devoid of customers when a guy in his early 30s walked in. He came right up to the counter where I was hanging out and said he was planning a large pie fight, and asked if I would be interested in being a part of it.
Even back then I had known for quite a while that I was into WAM, so this was like a dream scenario. However, something seemed a little sketchy about the guy, so I said no thanks. He asked me if I had any friends who might be interested, and I said no. He then quickly left the store and I never saw or heard anything about him again.
Since I turned him down so quickly I didn't get any further details, like if it was going to be filmed. It could've been something completely innocent and PG, or it could've been more. Maybe I dodged a bullet that day, but I occasionally fantasize about what could have been.
Many years ago when I was in my early 20s, I was struggling to come to terms with the fact that I was into this. I felt so in control of many parts of my life and didn't like that I couldn't handle this part of who I am.
I told my best friend, a straight guy, and he was textbook amazing in how he handled the situation (with kindness, respect and just like a friend should).
A couple of months later, we had gone for drinks just before Christmas and when two of our friends left the bar, he asked if I had managed to explore it. I said I hadn't. He said 'It's Christmas, shall we give it a go'? I didn't have a change of clothes - he offered some of his. So if we went.
I completely understood the boundaries, but he said years later that he had found it a fun experience. It made me feel 'normal'.
We are still best friends - I was best man at his wedding and am godfather to one of their lovely kids.
James-Likes-Mess said: Many years ago when I was in my early 20s, I was struggling to come to terms with the fact that I was into this. I felt so in control of many parts of my life and didn't like that I couldn't handle this part of who I am.
I told my best friend, a straight guy, and he was textbook amazing in how he handled the situation (with kindness, respect and just like a friend should).
A couple of months later, we had gone for drinks just before Christmas and when two of our friends left the bar, he asked if I had managed to explore it. I said I hadn't. He said 'It's Christmas, shall we give it a go'? I didn't have a change of clothes - he offered some of his. So if we went.
I completely understood the boundaries, but he said years later that he had found it a fun experience. It made me feel 'normal'.
We are still best friends - I was best man at his wedding and am godfather to one of their lovely kids.
One act of randomness completely changed my life.
What a beautiful story (and, I'm sure, experience) - and what a truly beautiful and incredible friend. Thank you, James, for sharing this.
Love you, too
