Came to my attention as I was filling shelves where I work, I wonder how people buy their bulk messy ingredients.

Are we secretive? do we buy online? or we just don't care whom sees what we buy.,

I always have some story made up in case the person at the register is wondering why I am buying 10 boxes of cake mix or nothing but a bunch of cool whip and syrup. So far no one has ever commented on it. But I do usually go shopping in the early morning when the cashiers probably don't give a fuck and just wish they were still in bed!

Checkout girl: "Having a party?"

Me: "Yeah, you could say that."

http://www.reactiongifs.com/r/excited-anna.gif

Every time I open a thread with one of your GIFs in it, my browser seizes up for 5 minutes.

I love the Princess Anna gif myself but my connection and PC are also not the average bear.

Walmart cashiers ask me almost every time to which I reply with one accentuated Word...."science!!!"

The last time I was at the store, it was almost like a story. The girl running the register looks over my items, then right at me and says:

"Oh my god, are you going to make a shaving cream pie and smash it in someone's face!? "

Yeah...

Ladies, gentlemen, reprobates, and others, I think we finally have the definitive answer to the "problem checkout question"! Respect to Trotterpm2!

Self checkout never asks questions like that

But does get fun when your half way through and the machine decides it can't tell whether you've scanned everything

But there are plenty of witty remarks you can make , such as...

- "Nah love, just stock pile'n for the zombie apocolypse",
- As totterpm2 said "For SCIENCE!!!",
- "Nah just confirming the mythbusters myth you can't explode a car with shaving foam, bastards at gellette shortchanged me by 5 cans",
- "I'm making a great big cake, wanna jump into it when it's done?",
- "Because Chuck Norris told me to",
- "Because 20L of custard in my leotard feels FUCKING AMAZING" or something like that
- "Because I feel like sacraficing food to the gunge gods",
- "Cuz baby Iiiiiiiiiiii'm craaaaaaaaaaaaaazzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzyyyyy" (in tune... of course :splat: )
- "I'm building a pie throwing trebachette! and I need pies LOTS OF PIES... By the way, I am looking for some test subjects/volunteers/assistants and you're pretty cute, care to join in?"

or there is the alternative of just smiling and giving them your number as you never know where it might lead

And I am sure some of the very smooth people here would have much better pickup lines/defuser lines than I do

(Disclaimer: I claim no responsbility for any ill-fate, being crash tackled by security, getting maced or otherwise ending up in the news as a result of any of the one liners or general advise in this post )