I am ready to take the plunge and tell my wife of 13 years of my fascination and fetish. My question is how did your husband /S. O. /lover/boyfriend /side piece/ indentured servent/mail order husband break the news to you? I'd rather tell her instead of her finding me mid jerk while covered in batter.

Thanks in advance

Best of luck but really 13 years? That's a long time to keep something like that from someone. I told my gf before we were together a year.

Agreed with the previous poster, you've left it far too long. There's a natural point to open up about these things relatively early on in a relationship. Everyone eventually has conversations centered around "what's the wildest fantasy you have or thing you've done," that's when you bring it up. It's possible there will be some sore feelings over not telling her earlier.

That being said, after being in a relationship for 13 years... you should have a very good idea how she will react. When you break it down, it really isn't such a bad reveal. It's an innocuous, fun fetish that people can engage with on multiple levels.

Yeah I know it's very late in our relationship to bring it up but my wife is not really into sex... Like at all. We have sex maybe once every two years. It's pathetic I know. She just has no interest so I figured it I brought it up earlier she would be even more turned off. But now I think it is important she knows. You never know how one will react I guess. Can't hurt or really get any worse.

Maybe start by asking her about her preferences. Does she simply have a low sex drive or does she have a fetish of her own which means vanilla sex doesn't satisfy her? That will hopefully lead on to her asking you the same question, but your question should be sincere.

Jesus, I don't want to be a killjoy, but this is how my marriage ended. My ex hated sex and hided it for years. I loved WAM and hided it for years. It wasn't a very good combo and only lasted that long because of actual love for one another. If you're a sexual creature, and your partner is asexual, it can be a really rough ride.

What kind of things DOES she like? If you've been together 10+ years she must seem to at least tolerate sexual intimacy.

I told my now wife before we were married, but when we had been together for almost 5 years. When I did so I made almost every mistake in the book - gave it a big build up, accidently made her think I had some big dark secret, sounded super-embarrassed about my fetish etc etc. Despite all that we got past that and went on to wam together and have fun with it, though I don't think it's ever become a turn on for her too. However, that said I think her biggest issue by far with the whole thing was how long I had kept it from her, so be prepared for that to be an issue in your situation too. However, if you think carefully about how you tell her, and maintain good, open communication throughout any initial shock on her part, it's entirely possible that telling her could end positively (or at least no worse than your current situation). If you do decide to go ahead, good luck!

I am replying on behalf of my wife. She's very shy. I told her of my interests and my desires within the first 3 months of us dating. It started playfully enough, just a drizzle of chocolate sauce on her cleavage. It has since, through trial and error and learning that her in case less is more, evolved into the occasional pie sit. Mostly, we use just a few cups of packaged pudding and a can of spray whipped cream in a session. Those are about once a month now.

If my wife had sex with me only once every 2 years, I would be in some sort of counseling with her.

And i'm going to come off like an asshole here...if that didn't work I probably would have left her. I would never get married to not have sex/do sex things. I'm a sexual creature and whether its from sex, her doing something just for me, or just me taking care of myself...I would say I have an orgasm about 4-5 times per week. I have no idea if that is a lot for a guy or not. I just know I love cumming, lol (especially on my wife's face and pretty hair!)

I definitely told her VERY early in our relationship about my messy fetish among other ones.

Girls don't like when you keep secrets!

And honestly man if you aren't happy, consider your future.

In an act of shameless self promotion, I wrote a guide that may be helpful to broaching the subject.

One thing I've been successful with is asking them what their fantasies are. Is there something they've like to try but have never done it? Something they've always wanted to do? Any kinks? Conversations like this end up being reciprocal, so everyone has a chance to share. And, of course, you get an opportunity to make her really happy, too.

I discovered it on my own because I'm a strong independent woman who don't need no man to introduce me to kinks, lmao

I was going to mansplain this but you got there first

I also discovered this fantastic fetish alone Not every woman who loves WAM was introduced to it by a man !!

Jeez. Take it easy ladies. The guy's just asking a question, not trying to take away your voting rights.

I asked my girlfriend to pie my face one day out of nowhere. The idea excited her, and the rest is history.

Luckily i met my now wife on fetlife and since we started chatting she new i was into sploshing along with other fetishes but with previous partners i've always told them early on in a relationship because i want to know what sort of fetishes or turn ons they have. Luckily all previous relationships have indulged in my fetish as i've indulged in theirs and all that tried it enjoyed it. Must be my chosing of laid back girls.
Sorry to hear that your wife doesn't seem to enjoy getting intimate. Have you asked her what she actually likes in the bedroom? But not telling her for 13 years is not good infact its probably harming your relationship because you are keeping it a secret for so long.
Possibly the best thing you can say to your wife is that you still like to get sexual enjoyment even if its alone and ask if shes alright with that?

Hope this helps even if its a little.

Ok, so to perhaps rephrase the title. "Ladies who were introduced to WAM/sploshing by your male partner, how did he come out (of the pantry) to you?"