Does anyone have any update on how Jessie is doing these days? Was just thinking about her and didn't see any update. Hope she is getting better and stronger.
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Hi, It's MJD Thanks for asking about Jess. If you go into the Off Topic forum all my detailed updates on her are there. She has a long long recovery ahead but whereas over the last 110 days she has changed her mindset hugely and is determined to get better now. There are two aspects to her illness. Physical and mental. Physically her body ....and hence her life were in danger because of the eating disorders (she has both anorexia and bulimia...the most dangerous combo as when one is prevented the ither kicks in) were causing either low body weight,or a lack of potassium from bingeing then purgeing which in turn puts her at very high risk of a heart attack plus her organs are pretty mauled. Mentally it's very very hatd to explain to a non mentally ill person about the mental side but I'll try. It's nothing to do with food. It's all about self hate,and believing she is worthless,a useless ugly fat cuntbag (her words) and never being 'good enough' which hoes all the way back to childhood. The fact she has survived this long is a miracle. Me or you looking at her and thinking ...er....she's beautiful,slim,cute,loads of fun means absolutely NOTHING to the mentally ill person. So as a result of all this help is needed but the person has to make a decision themselves to get well and accept the help. So after battling like fuck with the hosp/doctors/mental health and Jessie herself through Oct/Nov and Dec we've had realisation around Christmas from those parties what needed to happen. So 30th Dec the brave blondie went into a supervised mental health ward to keep her safe and free from outside distraction....very scary for her but she took it on the chin and as she started to reduce the being sick etc and was given meds by the staff she has shown improvement. Two days ago she moved to a better ward two days ago,with her own room but now has supervised eating and a 'shadow' So she has now eaten little meals....at the right times and not been allowed to throw them up. This is a terrifying situation for a bulimic to have the food still inside them. However she has been very brave and has realised this really is worth it and she is trying her best....it's epic in fact. She is allowed little trips out in the afternoon and today we had an amazingly nice few hours in a quiet pub. The next step is she is getting an assessmemt for an actual eating disorder unit place which would be 3 momths inpatient then a year of outpatient treatment. They have to 'earn' the right to treatment by putting effort in to gelp themselves and she is proving herself now over and over again. She's changing as a person....much more solution orientated and everyday her brain,memory etc gets a bit better as her physical balance is getting restored. So I can deffo say huge progress has been made. For me I have to balance encouragement with understanding setbacks,recognise progress without going too far. It's very upsetting and frustrating for her when people casually say over and over again : Are you better yet? You are 'looking' much better. When are you getting messy again? Glad to see you are well again...because they have just watched an old video This is an illness she has had since she was 7! 27 years of this shit so it's going to take a good while to unravel. Lots of positive times/little victories plus utter sadness and physical and emotional pain for her.... I hope I've explained that as simply as poss
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That was a very good explanation. Plus, it's the first time that I know of that you used the "A" & "B" words. I picked up on that probably being the situation when you started talking about "Eating Disorders".
I know what you mean about Jessie's body image. To us she looks beautiful, and she's always been slender as far as I remember. But to her, the mirror lies. In her head she's fat.
I'm just glad that things are finally getting in place for her to get the type of care that she needs.
God bless Jessie! And best of luck to her!
And to you, also, for being there for her and helping her fight with "the establishment" to get what she needs!
Norman
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