Both the "comedy WAM" and "surprise WAM" threads below got me thinking about what turns me on about a messy situation. And I realised that, for me, an important part of it is that there is a slow deliberateness to it.

One of the sexiest things I've ever stumbled upon was when, many years ago, I was out walking and paused on a bridge. It was a rather chilly, grey day, but a small party in open canoes were milling around on the water below discussing something with someone on the bank. A girl on the edge of the group was clearly bored by the discussion and, unobserved by the rest of the group, she very slowly and deliberately tipped her canoe until the water, which must have been cold, began to trickle in over the edge. She sat there for about a minute as the level rose, flooding over her shoes and socks, soaking her waterproof trousers and rising up the bottom half of her coat. Eventually she was noticed by someone else in the group, whereupon she began to cry out and pretend it was an accident, but it very clearly hadn't been.

For me, that slow, deliberate "WAMming" was far sexier than if she'd unexpectedly capsized, or been suddenly pushed over by someone else. But, then, I don't find "slapstick WAM" does it for me. How do other people like their WAM, fast or slow?

This, I mean why is the WAM happening? If it's a random or surprised thing, than the shock of a fast sliming or whatever does more for me.

If it's romantic or sexual, than I prefer a slow build up.

Slow.

Then fast.

I always tell my producers to have lots of dialogue between each pie. Its slow and deliberate and absolutely not a free-for-all. That way:

- each pie hit matters
-it makes the video longer
-it makes the pies last longer