Recently buying supplies, have been questioned

1) Delivery driver. That's alot of whipped cream. What are you going to do with all that?

2) Shop Till Assistant. I take it you love Angel Delight?

What's the funniest experience you've had?

I've always tended to break stuff down into smaller shops in an attempt to avoid questions. I also tend to vary the stuff that I'm buying to avoid buying lots of one particular item which has the added benefit of trying different stuff out. I know that wouldn't work for lots of people though particularly if your having to get specific stuff for a shoot.

I live in the Midwest so everyone is too nice to say anything lol, and I use self checkout.

That said, last time I was grabbing 12 double cool whips at Walmart, a guy was talking about his sweet tooth, pointed at me and said "looks like you have a sweet tooth too!" "Yeah, for sure I do!"

People at the bakery I go to probably wonder I buy a bunch of expensive pies every other month.

I had answers ready and just laughed it off. Cos its fresh cream you can't really stock up. Didn't take into account the nosey delivery driver though. My partner has started to buy pie crusts in 1s and 2s now though

I'm a chicken. Self checkout only for me. I swear though it's like I feel eyes on me as I scan and bag 6-8 cool whips or whatever. Even if they are mixed in with my other groceries. And even though I know in my rational mind nobody fucking cares.

Me too. One time I put 10 tubs of whipped cream into a bag in the trolley and looked over my shoulder as I scanned them in case I saw someone I knew

Posted this back in 2014

Something very interesting just happened to me. I have never been to CA and here I am on my first trip and I'm at a grocery store in Larkspur. I buy a ton of pie supplies when the cashier says to me ". Oh it's the pie guy again. You want plastic like last time". My response was sure but made me think. Who is the pie guy in Marin county buying all the pie supplies at this store???

I bought 6 cans of whipped cream from work at one point. One of my mates there said, "Oh, yeah? Who is she?" I just said I go through a lot as I put it on my coffee.

Walmart has the order online. If they question, I just tell them its a fundraiser, or a student stage production.

Used to be self checkout at Walmart but now you can order online, I just order it from Walmart.

Absolutely, and in person too. Say for a kids class fundraiser, or a film project. Art or good causes and people just say aww. I went out with
model from here supply shopping in person once and she just straight up told the person it was a sex thing and then explained. The person was amazingly positive in response and into it, but I wanted to turtle so hard.
I personally just gradually stockpile over time and have a back up supply fridge.

I just tell the clerk exactly what I'm doing if they make a comment.

That is so funny. Might use that next time

I usual just buy 1 or 2 cartons on my weekly shop and slowly build it up.

However, in saying that a family member came round once, we were chatting and I went and made a coffee, they followed me in to the kitchen, and while was making the coffee, said ' why have you got about 20 cartons of custard in your cupboard? '

My reply was the worst ever when I said ' well you know, armageddon, you never know'

We just laughed, but it was a bit awkward.

I still stock up each week though

We buy the usual suspects every week during out 'main shop'. This gets added to the stock in the garage.
2x extra boxes of porridge and some jam etc doesn't stand out in a £140 shop.

Plus, maybe the occasional self checkout top-up

Also induces the messy events. I use everything we have in one go, so the longer it is between messes, the more she has to take.
It's great when I have been stocking up extra without her knowing and she goes out to the garage to get it

What's your defaults?

Tesco or Sainsburys smooth porridge. £2.20 and its just about the cheapest way to fill a bucket with thick goo.
Basics range jam - £0.39p
750G jar of smooth peanut butter
Black treacle
Basics chocolate spread

If you fancy savoury, then there is always the cheap (£0.19p) baked beans and spaghetti, but cook them first.... they then go soft and mushy.

If you have not tried black treacle and smooth peanut butter.... it's amazing. Over a short time, it turns into a caramel type consistency.

Have you tried Angel Delight? Not sure how to mix it for pie filling

I've been asked why I was buying 30+ pies. I deadpan responded "I make erotic cake art. These are for a photo shoot" The 50-something cashier looked a bit incredulous so I handed her one of my lenticular business cards and said "look it up". The model who was in line with me held out her phone and said "wanna see some of our other work". It was met with delight and she said she'd check us out for sure.

I had one model who loved to make the shelf stockers blush.. when asked "is there anything I can help you with" while we were picking out frosting she would always ask "yeah which of these would look best smeared all over me if I was completely nude?" We usually got some honest opinions but delivered with sheer confusion on their countenance and usually some reddened cheeks.

I had one cashier say it looked like we had a REALLY interesting party planned. I said she wouldn't believe me if I told her. "Try me. I've seen a lot in my day". Showed her some photos. She gave me her number and we'll probably be shooting before too long.

Having zero embarrassment about what I do and being an extreme extrovert has made meeting fresh folks folks to shoot with and marketing my artwork a pretty remarkably easy endeavor.

I actually met one of my very dear friends that way kinda. She's the one who made the r2d2 cake for me. She is an AMAZING cake maker. A model and I were at the store she worked at and one of her colleagues was taking care of us. She asked the model what she wanted written on the cake. Without missing a beat she says "write I buttsex please"

The lady shouted to the woman who became my friend "hey Candace. Some of YOUR people are here.. can you help them?" - it was the start of a beautiful friendship. Any of the more ornate cakes in my shoots have been her doing, including cactus cake with edible sand used for Larzstord's first messy shoot.

If the shop assistant is paying enough attention that they notice your shop is remarkably unusual, and they ask, you may as well just directly tell them, in my view. They asked, after all. Sure it's a bit weird, but there's nothing *wrong* with it. Honestly, it's a laugh!

It's 2024, come on, the only kind of cringe we should have is the moment right before the bucket gets poured!

We have bought like 40 or 50 pie crusts at once at the store during the day lol.
Matti used to be so scared someone would find out their messy secret, but now we're open and it's pretty exciting to see if you can meet someone to get messy with "in the wild"
If they can tell what your up to with all the messy food and pies, they're prolly thinking about it on their own!

when buying quite a lot of goldpaint the girl at the counter asked why i needed so much; most people only buy one or 2...
Explained it was for photo's like the on on my profilepicture.

1 week later she was model for it herself

Tried the self checkout and was selected for a re-scan.

Loaded with whipped cream, ice cream, and frozen gateaux I said "family get together, so I get to pig out on all the stuff I usually don't get to eat and pump other people's kids full of sugar!"

If you're shy- don't sweat it. (Sadly) most retail staff are not paid enough to give a toss so they rarely bat an eyelid at what you're buying. As long as you're not an active annoyance (dropping stuff on the floor, acting inappropriately etc) your "odd" purchase won't be noticed because people buy weird stuff/combinations on the regular.

Also if you are a bloke buying woman's clothing for yourself, just write down your size on a scrap of paper and look a little lost as you browse the display. 'Confused man buying for his partner' is very easy to pull off, and is a pretty regular occurrence in any lingerie shop.
The story I remember being told is that one guy who insisted several times that the bra and skirt was for his sister. Doubling down very hard before anyone even asks makes you very memorable- please don't do that. Play it cool folks.

(Ebay) seller asked if I was getting married since I'd brought her old dress; I said it was for a photoshoot (or a stage production can't remember) and promised it'll go on to a good home after that.
I really didn't have the heart to tell her it would be a messy shoot and her fabulous and rather expensive dress probably wouldn't survive.
(Really big floofy 80s style dress- it looks amazing!)