I saw the post on UMD about 'S.L.O.S.H. Presents Messing about an Underworld' on 5 April and within about 30secs of reading the post, I knew I had to buy a ticket. Ticket was bought without any problems and now I had the wait for the event.

Having been to Underworld previously I knew where the location was and it was still relatively easy to find. On my arrival I was greeted by several members of staff who were all very friendly and welcoming. After being allocated my number for the draw of the events, I did think 'I am not a number, I am a free man!' but I was glad I did have a number as I got called up! I was instructed to look after my ball, more about that later! I got changed into my red and black PVC outfit and waited until we were let into the main room.

On being let into the main room I took my seat not entirely sure what would be happening as I had never been to one of these events before. However, once it got started it felt like a crossover from the TV game shows I have watched and a burlesque show. Various messy games were held and the compare's did the segue between the games well. Contestants for the games were chosen by pulling a numbered ball out of a bucket. I am therefore glad that I looked after my ball from the reception to the final signing area. My numbered ball was 44 and it got picked for the game of statutes. I made my way to the centre of the stage, where comment was made by the compare about my PVC being a bin bag, whilst this was done in a jovial manner, I knew I would have to get a dig back in. One other person were chosen and we were then asked to leave the stage.

On leaving the stage, we were asked by the 'stage monkeys' to strip down to our underwear. For the other person with me they were already in their trunks, so it wasn't a problem. However, being in a PVC playsuit, I wasn't wearing any! This caused a quick run back to the changing area to get my case and return to the staging area to quickly change into my trunks. Now, something dear reader you should be aware of wearing a PVC playsuit is fun and in my opinion looks good. The downside is getting in and out of it which normally takes time. There is a wraparound zip that goes from the collar around the crotch and up the back to just above the bottom. I think some of you may already be ahead of me at this point. Needless to say I have to be careful of the zip, particularly when I swing low so to speak. So gentleman of the audience if you heard a shriek from back stage it was me getting my bits caught in the zip! After changing into my trunks, I was ready to return to the stage.

On the call back, the compare was surprised that I had lost my PVC and stated 'where has it gone? In the bin' to which I replied 'what like your jokes!' Like I said I knew I would get a dig in! At this stage I was both slightly nervous and excited as I wasn't sure what was going to happen next. Two other audience members were chosen and the game we had to play was 'Statutes' This involved me striking a pose and the other person covering me in shaving foam to look like a statue! We were up against another team of two. My team partner, who I can't remember his name but I know he was from Germany, did an excellent job of covering me from head to foot in the foam, goaded on by the compare. Some of you will have seen me moving when the foam was applied, as this is because I have very sensitive skin which makes the touching sensation fun. At the end of the game I could hardly see being covered in so much fun. It went to an audience vote and the other team got a few cheers, but when it came to mine we got the biggest cheer. I just want to say 'Thank You' to all those that did, as that rush of support was like a huge energy wave passing through me. I couldn't see how covered the other team was, but my teams 'prize' was to enter the gunge tank! At this stage ever since I had seen 'Noel's House Party' I had wanted to go in a gunge tank. My German friend entered the tank first and I, in my messy state, entered second and sat on his lap. The gunge was then released and even though I knew it was running I didn't feel it at first and couldn't work out why, until I realised it had to get through the mountain of shaving foam first. When it did hit me it felt, sticky, gooey and wonderful! Check that off the bucket list. After the tank had dumped is load we left the tank careful and were escorted off stage to the clean-up area.

I ended up in the pool attempting to get clean and whilst I manged to do my front the rear of me was more difficult and need the assistance of the 'clean up monkey.' As previously stated I have very sensitive skin and the 'clean up monkey' was very a very 'cheeky monkey' and did cause me to shriek! However it was all good clean fun!

On my return from getting clean it was the interval and I retook my seat ready for the second half f the show. More games ensued and I was laughing watching all the contestants get messy and the confusion of the hosts when the games got confused.

Overall I had a brilliant night and whilst I do not go looking for attention, I do like it when I get it, so being on the stage did bring out my exhibitionist streak. I would like to thank the organisers and the stage crew monkeys and the hosts for putting together an absolutely awesome night. I am writing this blog the next day and I am still buzzing from it and it will not be a night I will forget.