K. Writes: "Why all of the boob pics? Are any of them you?"

Why the pics? I like them! They're aspirational to me at the moment I find them, and for the "theater in my mind" (not a real theater, just go with it for a second) I imagine that's what I'd look like while I'm fooling about. And they're sexy! So I project my sexiness into that sexiness and that sexiness into my sexiness. I also love the idea of RP'ing a Mystique-like behavior where I can appear as any persona I or we like. Or have a quantum technobabble machine that temporarily transmorphs you for an hour or two. It's all a part of acting out a slapstick role for me, and it's fun. Hopefully also fun for the RP partner as well!

If it pleases you for any of them to be me, by all means, go for it!


MPF writes: "Wow your profile is amazing, you're like the perfect woman!"

Well thank you! I've heard this a few times this week, and while it is flattering (bats eyes), lets all come back down to reality for a few moments. This anonymous profile of mine is a way for me to express ALL of my pie-sexual, slapstick-erotica, exhibitionist fun in one place. It's concentrated-me. You don't see the real life crap I (and everyone else) put up with every day. The *ahem* "constant banalities of everyday life" are hidden behind a persona of pure pie-faced joy!

In other words, this isn't complete me. This is the part of me that belongs on UMD! I'm very very glad you like what you see! But it's not a full picture. Yes, it's "real", but not representative of what a first date would be like (which, I think, is where these kind of incoming messages are going).


PMN chats: "Can I see what you look like? Then can you pie me while I am tied up to a tree?"

No. No, No, a thousand times: no. I'm anonymous (pseudonymous to get technical about it) because a)I get to express my pie-sexuality to the maximum in an environment under my control without fear for my well being; b) It's SAFER. Safety is a big deal. A very big deal. Being a woman on the intertubes is like being a mouse in a world full of cats. I honestly don't know how the wonderful WAM women of UMD do it. Significant Other is a Navy SEAL?

But if it makes you feel better, I look like a giant rhododendron wearing a nerdy hoodie and cargo pants. Yes, it's true. I'm a 1990s Doctor Who alien.