"Where are you from?"
-Pieland, Slapstickonia, USA. Like it says on my profile!

"What do you do?"
-Mainly make silly and risky comments while someone is holding a pie. Generally this is right after whatever I was wearing is now on the floor.

"What's your major?"
-I have a degree in animal behavior. with a focus on sloths.

"How are you doing?"
- I'm doing fine!

"Would you tie me to a Canadian Red Maple Tree with yellow elastic bands wearing a marching band outfit and white socks and then pie me?"
-Sure. How about Thursday at 1pm?