Mainly I like wet clothes, but for everyone who has asked if I do messy, this is a true account of something I once did. And never did again. A mistake?
Enjoy, and do try it at home!


Once when I moved to a new flat I used a spare room that was still unfinished, builders stuff around, to indulge in a little fantasy. I put on beige retro high waisted panties, then a suspender belt and black stockings and high heeled black suede boots. I applied a little foundation, tiny amount of blusher, lipstick and eye-shadow, clip-on ear rings and pearl necklace. It took a while as I kept showing off in front of a tall mirror, enjoying my then long hair loose and beautifully conditioned and brushed and getting myself very turned on.
Feeling a little underdressed, I slipped on a tight-fitting lilac lycra dress, very sexy, made with a division so that it crossed the bosom, fixed at the waist and divided down one thigh. It had long sleeves and hugged my body very tightly, finished about 3" above the knee and I loved the swishing feeling of the hem on my legs. I wanted to dress this way all the time.

I had mixed a large quantity of very thick custard and had quite lot of whipped cream and some cardboard plates which I put on a table. I placed a chair in front of the mirror and sat down to admire the reflection of me at my sexiest, crossing and uncrossing my legs and blowing kisses.
I picked up a plate of the custard, teasing myself with it (You wouldn't dare throw that pie at me - my hair, my best clothes...!). I wished someone would just tie me to the chair and humiliate me. I spent some time wondering whether to go through with it - afraid of the consequences, of the clean up, and afraid of discovery. But I was overwhelmed by feelings of uncontrollable excitement in the pit of my stomach and my mouth was dry with fast breaths and anticipation, but I took the pie and splatted it hard into my face. Maybe harder than I intended. It was in my nose, had filled up one ear and I could not see.
When I cleared my eyes enough to see the mirror I was thrilled. My hair had a long streak of yellow stuck in one side and the front of my dress was speckled with the stuff and a couple of globs had hit my lap. Lovely! The person in the mirror no longer resembled me much with the thick goo hiding my features. This illusion prompted me to lift up my legs exposing the tops of the strange creature's stockings. I wondered what it would be like to mess up those stockings so I took a small amount in my hand and rubbed it slowly from the knee up to the lacy top. I liked it!
I gabbed some more and massaged quite a bit of custard into my legs from knee to stocking top. The black suede boots took an unintended hit. (Shame!) Then I stood up, the skirt sticking to my legs. The effect was wonderful in the mirror, and equally wonderful inside my panties.
I became very aware of the areas that had escaped so far and took another pie and pushed it into my "tits" (actually I had no bra as I thought of myself as a man in a sexy dress, not a man pretending to be a girl, but more about that somewhere else). As I expected quite a bit of the stuff oozed down inside the dress and a cold sticky feeling developed near my navel. I rubbed inside the top of the dress. I wanted more. For good measure the creature in the mirror wacked another one into my face, coating my hair.
Studying my reflection showed me that the back was looking relatively unscathed. I'll have a sit down on the chair and think.
HEY! who left a pie on the chair? OMG who would DO such a thing?
The seat of the dress was smeared with custard but the mess hadn't yet penetrated to my undies. I was messed on my face, hair, tits, tum and thighs. I was aware of a sexual sequence, of foreplay leading to delicious messing under my skirt. I took some whipped cream and spread it with both hands around my neck. This was very enjoyable so I applied more and more, the cream running down the inside of my dress, dripping up my sleeve and coating my long hair.
Next I lowered myself onto my knees and sat down on my heels. I noticed that those lovely suede boots were increasingly getting messed up (boo!). Building work debris stuck to the messy clothes. I spread my legs and looked in the mirror at the sexy messed-up creature.
I spoke to the creature, "You shameful, fucked-up slut! This is where you take a pie in the panties!"
I lifted the skirt and regarded the panties and suspenders. They were still fairly clean, maybe a couple of tell tale stains and a big silky bulge. Oh to bend backwards and have someone to push a pie onto this bulge! A pie was applied and the cool mess felt soaking through the thin material was heavenly. I placed a pie on the floor and lowered my bum onto it. In a frenzy I sat on the chair and poured the remainder of the custard into the front of my panties and squirmed until every crevice concealed by the silky panties was filled with sweet, sticky liquid.
I poured the rest of the whipped cream onto the top of my head and sat rubbing myself all over, spreading the goo over every part, in and outside the boots (what the fuck...). I wondered if I should try doing something normal, watching tv or something while like this. But I enjoyed drinking a beer and being turned on ready to burst I finished the session appropriately.
I say finished - I then ran a bath and got in, without removing the poor boots, and enjoyed that almost as much.
Two baths, actually.