I've had a profile on UMD for awhile, and I've been a lurker for a lot longer than that.

I think, like a lot of people who have a fetish, I found it weird to be public about it, even among a community that clearly embraces it. And strangely enough, I was uncomfortable joining this community for the opposite reason that it's so hard to be open about it in the rest of the world.

When you log onto the UMD, your fetish is everywhere - there was almost a sensory overload, and you find yourself worried that what you're into and the way you express it might not be accepted among people who, for all outward appearances, have made it integral and central to their lives.

That's why, I think, when I post in the future, I'll be keeping the mess in video form; the photos (with rare exception)? Just me being who I am in the rest of the world.

And I don't mean to come across that I think EVERYBODY should do it that way, but I think in all things balance is important. And that's how I'm gonna maintain mine.

This is a great community, and I'm discovering it's a very welcoming one. But as important as it is to embrace the weird kinks that get us off or just provide us enjoyment, it's equally important to remember that there are people under those mounds of mess.

Because at the end of the day, there's no such thing as a community without people.