(originally posted on the Splosh! board a few years ago, in response to a question about the history of the WAM scene)

WAM/sploshing is one of the worlds oldest pastimes, dating back further even than the human race itself. The wacky dinosaurs we know today only from documentaries like The Flintstones were notorious for tormenting each other with messy pranks with many a hapless triceratops finding itself being pelted by pterodactyl eggs dropped from above. Sadly, when the dinos' WAM tastes became so extreme that they took to experimenting with tarpits as their substance of choice it spelled doom for the species.
Meanwhile mammals were continuing to evolve, yielding the sub-species Homo-erectus, Homo-sapiens and Homo-splosheus, the latters cave paintings being distinctive by the recurring legend Ug dont know.

Eventually humans developed civilisations and with them more elaborate means of getting wet and messy. Queen Cleopatra of Egypt famously bathed in milk, with the famous exchange, Your majesty, would you like it pasteurised, as pasteurised is best?/Bathsheeba, Ill be appy if it comes up to me chest! (which tickled old Bathsheeba). The Greeks on the other hand were far too stuck up about the whole thing, which led their premier WAM model Helena (the face that took a thousand pis) to defect to their rivals the Trojans, where she succeeded in temporarily distracting them from their main industry of sending dodgy e-mails.

Then came Christianity and the subsequent witch hunting craze which goes down as the nuttiest excuse ever for dumping ladies in muddy ponds (dont get me started on where they took BDSM).

Following the cultural revolution that was the renaissance, WAM found a home in the world of art. Elizabeth Siddal joined the gallery of historys great wetlook models by posing fully dressed in a bath of water for Millais Ophelia, but the duos follow-up painting, Titania In A Bath Of Custard, was sadly lost to posterity.