Hi everyone, It's been a while since I caught up with many of you... life has been very busy, in mostly good ways.
I've struggled with the idea of talking about my fetish with a partner for a long time. I've had this kink since as long as I can remember, and I'm middle aged now. I was married for nearly a decade, and my ex-wife wasn't too keen on the idea, and we weren't really all that compatible in general. Post-divorce, I dated a bit, but casually, not long enough for "the talk," if you will.
I've had some irl sessions with members here and they were amazing. I've always wanted to be able to find the right person to be able to enjoy WAM with regularly, but I realize that the odds of randomly finding a wammer as a partner are unlikely. Like many here say, it's not about finding the person who is already into it, it's about finding the person who you are most comfortable being open about it with.
More recently, I'd been nervous about bringing it up with people I dated, not so much because of the expected response, but because a couple of really bad dating experiences (I have a restraining order against one GF for stalking, and another threatened to have her friends come rough me up) led me to worry that this info about me could be used maliciously. It's a big worry, I think many here can relate.
A little more than a year ago, I started dating someone, and it was apparent very early on that our love was real. I've never felt such a connection with a partner on so many different levels. Among other things, our sex life has been incredible, both of us sharing new experiences and finding extreme pleasure in doing so. But still, bringing up the WAM thing had me nervous.
I'd like to say that I manned up and laid it all out there in one night, but no, it took me a lot of nerve still to say anything at all. But finally, one night, a few months ago, while we were having some pillow talk, I brought it up. It was kind of like me saying:
"so, there's something I wanted to talk to you about..."
"oh yeah?"
"yeah, you know how you'd mentioned wanting to try using whipped cream sometime?"
"yeah?"
"Well, I'm kind of like 'really' into that..."
And we talked a little bit more about it... she somewhat got the idea. "Like we'd have to lay something out?" "...yeah, pretty much."
But we didn't go into a lot of detail. I kind of just left it at that. All credit is due to her, as she brought it up many times. I could tell it wasn't a fetish that she innately had, but that her love for me made it something that she wanted to try. She really is a hell of a woman.
To give her an idea of what we'd be doing, I played her some videos... Shout out to Messy M&M for making some really hot coed content.
Finally, after some planning, we made it happen. It was 2 weeks ago now, and it was really amazing. We didn't really hold back for a first session. She put on some lingerie and let me take photos of her mixing up the pie cream and then posing with pies. We had 6 cool whip and frosting pies, some marshmallow fluff, and chocolate and vanilla batter. She let me pie her all over and she pied me back. Sex in the mess was nice but slippery. We had plenty more fun after we'd showered off and cleaned up.
Probably the most hilarious part of the night was us dragging the inflatable pool into the front yard and hosing it down. It was dark at least, lol. Or maybe it was the squirrels the next day eating pie crust in the yard...
She had a good time, and we're going to continue to do it when time allows. I told her about this site, but I'm not sure if she's visited yet. We do have pics from the session... perhaps sometime we will discuss sharing with the community.
It feels really good to be able to open up to someone about something so private and intimate. I honestly thought for most of my life that this was something that simply wouldn't happen.
Very nice read and thank you for sharing. This is honestly one of my favorite types of things to read here on UMD. I had a conversation very similar to yours with my wife about a year and a half back, and it was mostly thanks to reading damn near every post in Messy Minds and every thread here having to do with "spouse". I had a post up detailing the conversation but had to delete it for reasons.
Few really understand how totally daunting it is to have a conversation with your SO that ultimately is "Hey, you know sex is cool and all, but you know what would really get me going? Throwing whipped cream pies in your face repeatedly and maybe dumping a big bucket of green slime over your head". They may not even be able to conceive of how this is possibly sexual. And even then, how will they respond? Willing ? Or just be like LOL NAH you're weird. It's a big moment to us to spill something like that. And the totally broad spectrum of possible reactions the SO could have is scary, so props to you.
Like I said I had a similar conversation with my wife late 2022. She is very practical and basically gave me the "Well I already think you're weird so if that's what you want to do let's try it." I got a pie session out of the talk. 8 pudding cool whip and frosting pies. We played a game and plastered each other with them. It was AMAZING and fun. She was great, and genuinely gave me everything I had hoped for. Months later when I brought it up again, hoping for a slime session, she told me she really didn't like having that shit all over her and in her hair. She was willing to mess me up though, provided she stay clean. I accepted. She dressed up hot and destroyed me with 8 pies and 3 buckets of slime. And she was an amazing distributor of mess. Teasing and fun, not rushing things. Again amazing. Not sure what the future holds for us in the respect of future sessions, or if I'll ever get to mess her again. But damn it feels so nice to not have to hide it anymore.
If anyone else is reading this unsure if you should have "the talk" with your SO, you totally should. Honestly the only thing worse than getting rejected is straight up not knowing.
Always so great to read when someone has introduced their partner to wam and it's gone well. Heartwarming and inspiring - really pleased for you Caution.
Completely echo what MasterGoat says - if you're thinking about opening up to your partner then go ahead and do it. I'd honestly say the best bit about having told my wife about wam isn't getting messy together (though that is amazing on the rare occasions it happens), it's simply not having to hide an important part of myself from the person I love.
This is amazing to read. Unfortunately, the relationship with whom I had the most compatibility in this regard ended. We're doing well these days, but to each his own, and as expected, she didn't continue with this kink. I always discuss the topic with my partners because for me this is not a shame in the sense of being a harmless
I'm so happy for you! Congrats on finding a partner you are happy with and can share your deepest desires with, you truly deserve to have this experience She sounds like a lovely woman and a lot of fun, I hope she really enjoys WAM and becomes one of us! And I hope this continues to be fun for you both and this relationship is a lasting one